Communication Among the People of God

In this part of the sermon: Martin briefly recaps the three prior studies: God as the model verbal communicator (Genesis), the Golden Rule applied to the speaking mouth, and the Golden Rule applied to the…

The opening chapters of Genesis are cited as the model for all godly communication — God himself speaks, and his speech is the paradigm for what true verbal communication looks like.

We do have not a few tonight who have not been with us for the previous studies and particularly for their sakes. Let me take just several minutes to give a brief synopsis of what we've covered. In our initial study, I set before you what I called a broad overview of the biblical doctrine of verbal communication and focusing our attention particularly in the opening chapters of Genesis, we saw that God himself is the model of what true godly communication is. God is the great verbal communicator.

3:13 - 3:51 Read in full sermon

In this part of the sermon: Martin briefly recaps the three prior studies: God as the model verbal communicator (Genesis), the Golden Rule applied to the speaking mouth, and the Golden Rule applied to the…

Previous studies applied Matthew 7:12 first to the speaking mouth and then to the hearing ear, structuring the series around the two components of every verbal exchange.

And then in the last two studies, we have taken a look at the Bible and we have taken a look at the Bible and we have taken a look at the Bible and we have taken a look at the Bible and we have taken our Lord's words in Matthew 7, 12, commonly called the Golden Rule. As you would that others do unto you, even so do ye also unto them, for this is the law and the prophets. And having briefly expounded the text, we have applied it to this matter of verbal communication, particularly as communication is made up essentially of a speaking mouth and of a hearing ear. And so we applied the Golden Rule...

3:52 - 4:33 Read in full sermon

The point: Ask what would happen in any congregation where every person united to Jesus Christ made conscience of James 4:11 — do not speak one against another. Load your conscience with that command.

Commentator R.C.H. Lenski is cited for the idiom that best captures James 4:11 in current speech: running down a brother or sister in the ears of another believer.

Here we are commanded in the plainest words, do not speak one against another. And as Lenski has suggested, probably the best idiom by which to reflect this in current Americanese is, don't run one another down. To speak against one another is to run down one brother or sister in the ears of another brother or sister. And the great motivation that James sets before us in buttressing this command is, when you engage in running down a brother or a sister by speaking evil of them,

13:22 - 14:06 Read in full sermon

The point: Ask what would happen in any congregation where every person united to Jesus Christ made conscience of James 4:11 — do not speak one against another. Load your conscience with that command.

To speak against a fellow believer is likened to usurping God's throne — leaving one's place as a creature and setting oneself up as the judge of God's servant. The master-servant relationship (each servant stands or falls before his own master) provides the frame.

you have left your place as a creature and you've usurped the prerogatives of God. You've ceased to be a lawkeeper and you now have become a judge of the law. You have, as it were, in principle pushed God off his throne, and set yourself up as that person's judge. That's the terrible arrogance of running down a fellow believer, usurping the rights of the God, the God who is the master before whom each servant stands or falls.

14:06 - 14:41 Read in full sermon

The point: Ask what would happen in any congregation where every person united to Jesus Christ made conscience of James 4:11 — do not speak one against another. Load your conscience with that command.

Martin notes that there is at least a wicked rationality when slander is used to elevate oneself, but often there is no explanation at all — pure heart-corruption finding a channel in the tongue, with nothing constructive achieved and no better light gained by the speaker.

Now how easy it is to speak against one another. What is there in our remaining sin that acts in such a perverse way that we hardly need to think, and before we know it, we are magnifying the faults of our brothers and sisters in the ears of another brother or sister. No good comes from it, there is nothing constructive that comes from it, and many times we are not even put in a better light because of it. It's understandable, albeit perverse, when we speak evil of another in order to make what we say or do about the other the very platform upon which we raise ourselves.

14:41 - 15:25 Read in full sermon

The point: Lying does not require outright falsehood; deliberately selecting partial truths to convey a wrong impression violates Colossians 3:9. Examine your communication for this subtle form of deception.

When truth falls from a society, the glue holding communication together as meaningful exchange is gone. Every liar assumes others lie like himself, creating mutual suspicion and the collapse of trust — each man looks a man in the eye and says 'this is a fair price' knowing it isn't.

When truth falls from a society, the glue that holds communication together as a meaningful exchange is gone. Each man who is a liar doesn't trust what the other man says because he assumes he is like himself. And he will lie for advantage so he assumes this man will lie. He will look a man straight in the eye and say this is a fair price when he knows it isn't, but he knows the other guy will do it to him.

19:03 - 19:30 Read in full sermon

The point: Lying does not require outright falsehood; deliberately selecting partial truths to convey a wrong impression violates Colossians 3:9. Examine your communication for this subtle form of deception.

Christ's teaching against oath-taking is cited to illustrate the new humanity's standard: your word should need no reinforcement because it is known to be truth.

This is what Jesus meant when he said you shouldn't have to take an oath and swear that what you say is true by the temple and by heaven and by the angels. Let your yes be a no. Let your no be a no. Would you like to come over to my house for supper?

20:02 - 20:19 Read in full sermon

In this part of the sermon: Lying is the mark of the old man; believers have put him off. Martin carefully defines the sin (deliberate false representation of reality), distinguishes it from lawful…

A vivid scenario: someone invites you to supper and you don't want to go — the family has unruly children and you'd leave pulling your hair out. The temptation is to manufacture a polite excuse. Martin insists: say no honestly, and if pressed for reasons, ask if they really want to know before you tell them.

No. Not oh yes, but, and then you lie and think up some reason, quotation marks, because you're afraid you'll hurt the person if you say no, I really wouldn't like to spend an evening in your home. You've got a bunch of little unruly brats and I think I'd leave the home after three hours pulling my hair out. Now when you say no, you may not have to tell them all the reasons.

20:19 - 20:41 Read in full sermon

The point: God makes no distinction between little white lies and great lies. Once someone discovers you have lied even in a small thing, all trust is shattered. Refuse every form of deliberate deception.

Before delivering a hard truth to someone who asks for it, make sure they are genuinely inviting the full answer — 'make sure they're telling you to aim the gun and pull the trigger before you do it.'

I mean make sure they're telling you to aim the gun and pull the trigger before you do it.

21:28 - 21:33 Read in full sermon

The point: God makes no distinction between little white lies and great lies. Once someone discovers you have lied even in a small thing, all trust is shattered. Refuse every form of deliberate deception.

In a society saturated with lying, the church ought to be an oasis — a refreshing place where every yes is yes and every no is no, free from the distrust that pervades the world because of lying as a way of life.

Once you discover that someone has lied to you, it shatters all trust and communication utterly breaks. And what an oasis the new humanity should be in a society full of distrust. Because of lying as a way of life. What a reality.

21:48 - 22:08 Read in full sermon

Driving home: Our speech either affirms the reality of what God in Christ has made us or denies it.

Martin notes the striking realism of Scripture: Paul addresses these warnings about abusive and obscene speech to those he has just described as chosen in Christ, redeemed, sealed with the Spirit, crucified and raised with Christ — evidence that such sins are genuine dangers for true believers.

He was writing to the saints. He was writing to those there at Ephesus whom he describes as chosen in Christ, redeemed and accepted in the Beloved, sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise. In Colossians, he's writing in that very chapter to those who have been crucified with Christ, who have been raised with Him, are seated with Him, and yet to such people he needs to say, put away all abusive, obscene, corrupting, and unbecoming speech. Thank God for the realism of the Word of God.

25:12 - 25:47 Read in full sermon

Driving home: Our speech either affirms the reality of what God in Christ has made us or denies it.

From pastoral observation, when Christian men gather, the greatest temptation is speech that borders on the obscene — speech not befitting those who are conscious that every word is spoken in God's ears.

May I suggest that it's been my pastoral observation, though you can't make hard, fast categories, that when men get together, perhaps their greatest temptation, even Christian men, is to drift into speech that at least borders on the obscene and often is unbecoming speech. It is not speech that is convenient, speech that reflects a conscious awareness that every word I speak is spoken in the ears of God. So that even when I'm with a group of my friends, and they are all men, and when it might be proper in that context to use speech

25:47 - 26:31 Read in full sermon

The point: Pursue the happiness of the congregation that takes these three negative injunctions seriously — not speaking against, not lying, and not making each other's ears receptacles of corrupt speech.

Martin notes that recent years had shocked him with the coarseness of women's language in the world, while observing that among Christian women the characteristic temptation is abusive and corrupting speech that has no wholesome influence.

The past couple of years have utterly shocked me to hear the language coming out of women. But amongst Christian women, the temptation perhaps is more in the direction of abusive and corrupting speech, speech that has no wholesome influence. When people imbibe it, it does not feed them and edify, but has a corrupting and negative effect upon them. Well, the Word of God is clear.

27:05 - 27:36 Read in full sermon

The point: Pursue the happiness of the congregation that takes these three negative injunctions seriously — not speaking against, not lying, and not making each other's ears receptacles of corrupt speech.

If God has made believers new men in Christ, a tongue that was once dishonest, corrupt, and abusive ought now to be a new tongue — the speech of the new humanity, not the old.

Has He made us new men? Well, what's a new man without a new tongue? And a tongue that was once dishonest and spoke corrupt things and obscene things, a tongue that once was marked by railing and abusive speech, if that's the tongue of a new man, it ought to be a new tongue. It puts away all such speech.

28:05 - 28:29 Read in full sermon

The point: Your tongue in Spirit-directed use can be the conveyor of Christ's grace to another believer. This is a means of grace that every member, not just the pastor, is responsible to deploy.

Based on Ephesians 4:29, Martin coins a striking phrase: the tongue is a means of grace. It can convey the grace of Christ to another believer just as surely as the public preaching of the word.

Isn't that an amazing thing? There's a means of grace between your two cheeks. It's your tongue. And your tongue can be the conveyor of grace to another.

32:56 - 33:09 Read in full sermon

The point: Your tongue in Spirit-directed use can be the conveyor of Christ's grace to another believer. This is a means of grace that every member, not just the pastor, is responsible to deploy.

As a young Christian, Martin took Ephesians 4:29 so literally that at a college dining hall with two thousand students he would only speak to pass food unless the conversation was explicitly about God, Christ, the Bible, or Christian experience — sitting silent like a monk.

I really did. And I became like a monk. I would sit at the table. I can remember it.

34:40 - 34:47 Read in full sermon

In this part of the sermon: The word of Christ dwelling richly should leak out in informal interaction, enabling all believers — not just pastors — to teach and admonish one another. Martin illustrates from…

God later showed Martin that he could build up a weary, burdened brother through innocent, calculated humor — injecting laughter with a deliberate view to building up, not tearing down. The merry heart of Proverbs 17:22 is invoked as the scriptural basis.

I was just dead in earnest to please my Savior and I was a bit ignorant. And then God taught me a little more of His ways and I realized that I can build up a brother who's weighed down with a host of burdens by injecting into him to the perspective of his present heaviness a little innocent humor. But you see, I inject the humor with a view to building it up. It's not idle humor.

35:24 - 35:51 Read in full sermon

In this part of the sermon: Exhortation is not primarily negative rebuke but positive drawing-alongside to motivate action. Martin works through 1 Thessalonians 4:18, 5:11, and 5:14, illustrating from a…

From a prior exposition of Hebrews 3:13, Martin corrected the popular misconception that exhortation primarily means admonition or rebuke. The fundamental meaning is positive: to draw alongside and motivate to action. In some passages it is actually translated 'encourage' or 'comfort.'

And in a sense this may be a subdivision of building up one another, but I'm not too concerned about technical divisions. I want to get the main text before you. Some of you will remember when I had the occasion to expound Hebrews 3 that I pointed out that when I read Hebrews 3 I pointed out that when we are told in verse 13 to exhort one another daily, that most of us have a misconception of exhortation. We think of it in terms of admonition or rebuke.

36:57 - 37:27 Read in full sermon

The point: It is not enough to avoid the negative sins of speech. Are you actively doing the positives? Ask yourself: what brother or sister have you encouraged verbally in the last week?

Drawing on Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress character Mr. Ready to Halt, Martin warns against approaching the faint-hearted with harsh words — they are not lazy but weak. The call is to draw alongside and encourage, not clobber.

And find those who are like bunions, Mr. Ready to Halt. And don't come and clobber them and say, why in the world are you always dragging behind? They are faint-hearted.

39:58 - 40:09 Read in full sermon

The point: It is not enough to avoid the negative sins of speech. Are you actively doing the positives? Ask yourself: what brother or sister have you encouraged verbally in the last week?

At the Mobile U.S. Indoor Championships, Martin observed coaches and friends on the side of the track shouting, waving, and prodding runners on the final lap — not tripping them. He contrasts this with how Christians so often trip one another with injudicious words instead of cheering them on.

Encourage them. Draw alongside and encourage them. Someone took my wife and me into the first indoor track meet I've ever seen. Took us into the Mobile U.S. Indoor Championships

40:10 - 40:22 Read in full sermon

The point: Identify the discouraged and disheartened in your congregation. Draw near to them and encourage them verbally. The duty is not discharged merely by abstaining from evil speech.

The Servant's gift in Isaiah 50:4 — knowing how to sustain with words him that is weary — is applied to all believers. Martin asks who can measure in gold the worth of a well-timed word that caused a sagging brother to throw his shoulders back and fix his eyes again on Jesus.

Verse 4 of Isaiah 15. The Lord Jehovah has given me the tongue of them that are taught that I may know how to sustain with words him that is weary.

41:37 - 41:51 Read in full sermon

The point: Covet the gift described in Isaiah 50:4 — knowing how to sustain with words him that is weary. Cry to God to make you like the Servant, skilled in the timely, restorative word.

A word fitly spoken to a weary believer — one whose hands are hanging down and knees are feeble — is what causes him to suck in fresh air of confidence, lift his eyes off the mud of his sin, fix them on Jesus, and once again run with patience the race set before him.

Who can measure the worth of a word spoken in that state of weariness that caused you to throw your shoulders back, suck in some fresh air of confidence in the grace of God, got your eyes off off the dust and the mud of your own sin and fixed upon Jesus and before long you were once again back in the track running with patience the race that was set before you.

42:26 - 42:53 Read in full sermon

The point: Faithful open rebuke is better than hidden love. If you love a brother enough to wound him with a clear, gracious, biblical word, you are serving his soul better than the flatterers who kiss him into continued sin.

Martin reads both verses aloud: better is open rebuke than love that is hidden; faithful are the wounds of a friend but the kisses of an enemy are profuse — setting up the call not to betray brothers with Judas-kisses of flattery.

blesses us with instruction that is calculated to make us mature in Christ then surely this is one of the concrete expressions that ought increasingly to be manifested in our life together and then those critical texts in Proverbs I couldn't pass over this point without reading them in your hearing Proverbs 27 in verse 5 better is open rebuke than love that is hidden better is open rebuke than love that is hidden verse 6 faithful are the wounds of a friend but the kisses of an enemy are profuse oh let's not

48:50 - 49:35 Read in full sermon

The point: Faithful open rebuke is better than hidden love. If you love a brother enough to wound him with a clear, gracious, biblical word, you are serving his soul better than the flatterers who kiss him into continued sin.

Flattering a brother who is in sin and refusing to rebuke him is likened to Judas's kiss — an outward show of affection that in reality betrays the person into continued paths of fixed behavior contrary to the word of God.

kiss one another with Judas like kisses of betrayal betraying one another into paths of fear fixed behavior contrary to the word of God let's love one another enough to wound each other with gracious but clear and biblically flavored recruit better is open rebuke than secret love faithful are the wounds of a friend but you say pastor I've done it sometimes and I've been cut off and I've been turned off yeah I know what that is I know what it is to see people's faces and hearts turn away from me because I love them enough to be faithful to their souls any parent

49:35 - 50:19 Read in full sermon

The point: Faithful open rebuke is better than hidden love. If you love a brother enough to wound him with a clear, gracious, biblical word, you are serving his soul better than the flatterers who kiss him into continued sin.

Every parent experiences the child turning against them in the very pursuit of the child's well-being. That is where love is tested — whether you are willing to endure personal rejection for the benefit of the one you love. Solomon understood this and wrote Proverbs 28:23 accordingly.

will experience it at one time or another with his own children rare is the parent who brings the child from the wound to maturity without at one point having the child turn against him in the very pursuit of that child's well-being that's where love is put to the test where you're willing for personal rejection for the benefit of the one you love and Solomon understood this so he said to him he said in 28 in verse 23 he that rebukes a man shall afterward doesn't say immediately shall afterward find more favor than he that flatters with the tongue you see a person

50:19 - 51:04 Read in full sermon

The point: Be willing to bear personal rejection in the act of faithful rebuke. Love for your brother's soul means you are willing to endure the temporary turning away, knowing that afterward you will find more favor than the one w…

A man enmeshed in sin and in a backslidden state will surround himself with flatterers telling his conscience 'you're alright.' When someone finally comes, puts a hand on his shoulder, and shows him the scripture that addresses his sin, he may turn against that person — but it may well be the turning point of his restoration.

who is enmeshed in sin and in a backslidden state the last thing in the world that David wants in that condition is a Nathan to nail him with his sin and if he can he'll suck to himself and gather around him flatterers who tell him in his ears what he's trying to tell the ears of his own conscience you're alright you're alright you're alright you're alright you're alright you're alright you're alright you're alright and when all the false prophets of false friends are chattering that in his ears and someone comes along and puts a hand on his shoulder and says now my brother my sister you know ...

51:04 - 51:49 Read in full sermon

The point: After the sermon ends, go alone with God and pray these passages into your conscience. Do not be satisfied with a temporary disturbance that fades. Pray until the commands thunder at you when you are tempted.

Martin describes what it means to pray the word into the conscience: going over the passages alone with God until the commands thunder at you when you are tempted to disobey. Without this exercise, there is a temporary disturbance that quickly fades back into old patterns.

write those words upon my heart God make them a matter of conscience so that as I live before your eye if I'm tempted to do those things those words will thunder at me do you know what it is to pray the word into your conscience as I'm describing do you if not you won't grow as a Christian there'll be a little temporary disturbance and then you go right back to the same patterns and I can't do that for you I can try to preach the word explain it illustrate it apply it urge you but my friend you must exercise yourself unto godliness it would be lovely if I could have my exercise done by proxy

54:03 - 54:47 Read in full sermon

The point: Take immediate practical steps: identify the people with whom you are most tempted to speak evil, contact them as soon as possible, confess your sin, and if the relationship leaves you perpetually vulnerable, create appr…

Likened to physical exercise: you cannot press a button and have someone else run 20 miles a week for you. To keep the cardiovascular system in shape you must put on your running shoes and pound the pavement yourself. Conscience cannot be conditioned by proxy — each believer must pray the word into their own heart.

push a button and have somebody else go out and run the 20 miles a week for me so I can keep in half decent shape it would be lovely but I can't do it if I'm going to keep my cardiovascular system in shape I've got to put my running shoes on and I've got to put my running togs on and I've got to go out and pound the pavement you can't do it by proxy you can't condition your conscience by proxy you must pray the word into your own conscience I urge you to do it secondly immediately take some practical steps to start obeying these injunctions in ways you hitherto have never done David said I mad...

54:47 - 55:32 Read in full sermon

The point: Remember Psalm 15: there is a direct relationship between what you do with your tongue throughout the week and what you will know of God's presence when you gather with his people. Speech holiness is not peripheral — it …

Martin closes with Psalm 15, showing that the entire ethical description of the one who dwells on God's holy hill includes 'he that slanders not with his tongue.' There is a direct relationship between speech throughout the week and the experience of God's presence in corporate worship.

the part of a match in a dry forest behold how great a forest fire is kindled by a little match and then dear people of God let this final word sink into your hearts if you expect to really enter in to realize communion with Christ when you gather with his people in the special presence of his church I direct your attention to Psalm 15 for here in this church this psalm the whole question of what kind of person will enjoy the privilege of realized communion with God in the place that he is appointed to meet with his people notice how that person is described Lord

59:56 - 60:39 Read in full sermon