The Woman of Proverbs 31 (#3)

Introduction and Review of the Series

0:04 The following sermon was delivered on Sunday morning, September 8, 2002, at the Trinity Baptist Church in Montville, New Jersey.

0:19 I urge you to turn with me to Proverbs chapter 31.

0:26 Proverbs chapter 31.

0:30 I read in your hearing Proverbs 31, verse 1, and then dropping down to verse 10, and reading through to the end of the chapter. The words of King Lemuel, the oracle which his mother taught him. A worthy woman who can find, for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he shall have no lack of gain.

1:02 She does in good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax and works willingly. With her hands she is like the merchant ships. She brings her bread from afar.

1:18 She rises also while it is yet night, and gives food to her household, and their task or their portion to her maidens. She considers a field and buys it. With the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. She girds her loins with strength and makes strong her arms.

1:39 She perceives that her merchandise. is profitable. Her lamp does not go out by night. She lays her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.

1:51 She stretches out her hand to the poor. Yes, she reaches forth her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She makes for herself carpets or cushions of tapestry.

2:12 Her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and delivers sashes unto the merchant. Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.

2:34 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the law of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her man. She looks well to the ways of her man. of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises her, saying, Many daughters have done worthily, but you excel them all. Grace is deceitful, and beauty is vain. But a woman that fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her words praise her in the gates. Now let us again pray and ask the enabling grace of the Holy

3:24 Spirit for both preacher and listener alike. Our Father, we have come time after time prior to the ministry of the Word, acknowledging our present and utter dependence. Upon the ministry of your Holy Spirit, if we are rightly to understand your Word, if your servant is rightly and effectively to expound and apply and illustrate that Word, and we need the work of your Spirit in the deep chambers of our hearts, if we are to receive that Word in faith and obedience, give us then all that we need by the ministry of your Word. For blessed Spirit, we plead, believing that our Lord Jesus died to secure just such present, powerful, effective workings of the Spirit in our midst this day, and therefore in the confidence that having spared not your Son, that you will with him freely give us all things, we leave these petitions with you. Amen. Now when I introduced our study in Proverbs,

4:46 31, 10-31, last Lord's Day, I stated that that study would be the last message in the series entitled, In Praise and Defense of Marriage, Motherhood, and Homemaking. However, as I went back and reflected upon the passage, as I often do, having preached any given portion of the Word, it became clear to me that there was a major strand of truth in the passage that I did not address. A strand which, if not identified and expounded, would leave the exposition of the passage inexcusably inadequate, and our series of studies culpably incomplete. And I don't like to leave things inexcusably inadequate or culpably incomplete. Those two dives are not pleasant to live with. And so to get them off my back, I have determined to return to the passage this morning, and in a few moments I'll identify those particular aspects of the passage which I have not expounded or applied. But before I do,

Foundational Virtue and Fundamental Orientation

6:02 I want to take just a few minutes to review with you what we have seen in this passage. When we came in our series of studies, the subject of praise and defense of marriage, motherhood, and homemaking, considering those realities in the light of the biblical doctrines of creation, fall, and redemption, I stated that in a very real sense this chapter gives us the most complete picture of a thoroughly redeemed wife, mother, and homemaker to be found in any one portion of the Word of God. And so we turned to it, and I gave you what I call some introductory concerns. We considered who the human author was.

6:46 This man called King Lemuel, we know nothing for certain about him except that he was an instrument in the hands of the Spirit of God to give us a portion of the Holy Scriptures. He was obviously a prince slated to come to the throne when, and this was our second introductory observation, the source and form of this passage, when his mother taught him about what he should look for in his future wife. And most likely she taught it to him in the form in which the Spirit of God has given it to us, that is, an alphabetical acrostic, where each verse, beginning with verse 10, begins with a letter of the Hebrew alphabet, follows right on for the 22 verses. But then the most crucial introductory issue I laid before you was what I call the vital principle of interpretation and application. As so often is true in Scripture, Lemuel's mother did not teach him about the virtues of a godly, worthy wife in terms of those virtues in abstraction. She did not name them in terms of diligence and sensitivity and compassion, but rather she described those virtues clothed in the actions of this woman.

8:09 And those actions are clothed in a social, cultural perfection. economic setting that are peculiar to that woman, also in a setting peculiar to her native gifts, to her physical strength, and a host of other variables. Therefore, the task of the interpreter and the task of the wise Christian in applying what the text says is not to seek to reproduce in the external particulars what these things meant in this virtuous woman, but understanding the core virtues to dress them up in the cultural, social, economic setting of your own particular calling, consistent with your own endowments of strength, financial, etc., etc. And that is absolutely crucial if we are rightly to understand. And rightly to apply the passage. And then we considered together as our first major

9:14 heading, having cleared away those introductory concerns, the foundational virtue of this woman. We have to wait for it to be identified all the way to the end of the passage there in verse 30b, a woman that fears the Lord. And the root virtue out of which all the other virtues grew was that this woman was a woman of the Lord. And this woman was a woman of the Lord. And this woman was a woman of the Lord. And this woman was a woman of the Lord.

9:38 This woman was a God-fearing woman. And in the Old Testament, that phrase is simply synonymous with possessing and acting out true and vital godliness. It has its roots in the saving knowledge of Jehovah, the God of the covenant, and its fruit in living all of life before the eye of God in the light of the revealed will of God as found in the Word of God. And the root virtue of this woman was her fear of God.

10:13 Then we considered, secondly, the fundamental orientation or focus of this woman worthy of praise as a wife, a mother, and a homemaker. And that fundamental orientation was not found in her labors outside the home. She was not driven to these many labors which we have seen cannot. In any way be understood as locked within her four walls. There were many hours and much energy expended outside her four walls. But there was a simple, fundamental orientation and focus to all of them, and we saw it from the text. It was her husband and her household and the needy. These were the focus of all of her endeavors.

Dominant Virtues of the Praiseworthy Woman

11:07 Her labors outside the home did not terminate upon herself, finding self-fulfillment and stroking self-esteem and expressing self-actualization or all this other feministic and psychological nonsense. All of her labors outside the home were oriented to doing her husband good and not evil and looking well to the ways of her household. Then thirdly, and this was our study last week, we looked at the dominant virtues of this praiseworthy wife, mother, and homemaker. And I'm simply going to state them. If I whet your appetite, you can get the tape or the CD and listen to the full statement. She possessed the virtue of a godly stability and trustworthiness of character, verses 11 and 12. She possessed the virtue of a godly attitude to hard work. And to enterprising labor, the whole passage. She possessed the virtue of an ability to

12:14 organize and to structure both her time and her tasks so as to fulfill them efficiently to the glory of God. She possessed the virtue of a godly perspective regarding money and things. Again, almost the whole passage. She possessed the virtue of a compassionate and generous heart for the poor.

12:37 And for the needy, verse 20. She possessed the virtue of a wise and gracious heart, verse 26. And she possessed the virtue of a godly perspective concerning the relationship between internal grace and outward appearance and beauty. There we identified those seven major virtues that are cloaked in all the particularities and peculiarities of a woman's life. And she possessed the virtue of a godly perspective regarding money and things. Again, almost the full statement. She possessed the virtue of a godly perspective regarding money and things. Again, almost the pluralities of that social, economic, cultural setting consistent with the individual endowments of grace and strength given to that woman.

The Question of Praise and Affirmation

13:19 Now, we return to the passage this morning to take up several verses which we did not have time to expound. Though they were quoted in reference to identifying her fundamental orientation, they were not expounded in terms of their primary significance. Though they were quoted in reference to identifying her fundamental orientation, they were not expounded in terms of their primary significance. Have you guessed what those verses are? I hope you have.

13:41 We're talking about the verses that answer the question, Who in the world cares if a woman gives herself to being this kind of a woman? Who in the world will recognize it and think there's anything special about it except the Lord? Who will in any way come forward and say, I thank God that you're that kind of a woman? Well, that's the question.

14:09 That's the question that's answered in the texts that I did not expound. And so we're going to consider this morning these verses. Verse 28. Her children rise up and call her blessed.

14:23 Her husband also, and he praises her, saying, Many daughters have done worthily, but you excel them all. Verse 31. Give her of the fruit of her hands and let her works praise her in the gates. I'm going to handle these texts under this question.

14:43 Who is obligated to praise and affirm the worth of this praiseworthy wife, mother, and homemaker? Who among us today, sitting in this place, from the youngest to the oldest, who among us, who in society, who in the church, who in the world, who is obligated to praise and affirm the worth of the praise, worthy woman of Proverbs 31? Well, we're going to take up our subject under two headings. We're going to consider, first of all, the present source of praise and affirmation of the worth of this virtuous woman.

15:25 And then, secondly, the future source of praise and affirmation of the worth of this virtuous woman. First of all, then, the present source of praise and affirmation of the worth of this virtuous wife, mother, and homemaker. According to the passage before us, her praise is to come in this life from three obvious, well-defined sources. And the organizing principle, it seems to me, is these three are those who benefit most from her dedication to her God-given role and its manifold, respectful, responsibilities. And since they benefit most, they are to be most forward in praising her and affirming her worth with their lips, with their actions, and doing it not at her funeral in a eulogy. But while she's still alive and she ain't completely deep and can still hear the praise that comes from these three sources. Number one, her children.

Present Source of Praise: Her Children

16:38 Number two, her husband. Number three, the community of God's people. First of all, then, her children. Verse 28.

16:46 After describing all of the various virtues in their concrete manifestation,

16:56 we read in the words of King Lemuel, which words are an oracle, an authoritative word from God, her children rise up and call her blessed. Now, her children are described as doing two things. They are distinct, but intimately connected. Children, you see what they are?

17:20 You can circle the verbs in your Bible. Her children rise up and call. They do two things. One is physical, one is verbal.

17:32 That's what the text says. Her children rise up and call her blessed or bless her. They rise, they rise up. Now, what in the world does that mean?

17:44 That means you can't thank your mom while you're sitting at the table and say, Mom, that was a good meal. Thanks for being a good cook.

17:52 Now, the words they rise up can have one of two or perhaps a combination of significance. It could mean that they are pictured as making a distinct effort to step forward from others in order to say what they have to say. For example, in Jeremiah 26 and verse 17, we have a parallel phrase, a parallel phrase, Jeremiah chapter 26. Jeremiah has been accused of being seditious and there are certain ones that want to kill him. They want to see him dead. And so his life is in jeopardy and we read in verse 10, when the princes of Judah heard these things, they came up from the king's house to the house of the Lord. They sat at the entry of the new gate of the Lord's house and then they seek to sort this thing out and see whether or not indeed Jeremiah is worthy of being put to death. And now look carefully at verse 16.

18:47 I'm sorry, verse, yeah, 16 and 17. Then said the princes and all the people unto the priest and to the prophets, this man is not worthy of death, for he has spoken to us in the name of the Lord our God. Here's our phrase. Then rose up certain of the elders of the land and spoke unto all the assembly.

19:08 They rose up. They separated themselves. Some of the group came forward so that their very physical actions indicated we have something important to say on Jeremiah's behalf. That could be the significance of our text. The children are prepared to step out from the ranks of the ingrates and make it known we have got something to say about our mama. That could be the significance. On the other hand, it could be the rising up that we see in 1 Kings, chapter 2. 1 Kings, chapter 2. Remember what we're trying to do.

19:47 Simply ascertain the significance of what it means for children rise up. Since the text says that's part of what they do in recognizing the worth of this godly wife, mother, and homemaker, we want to know precisely what does it mean. Well, here in 1 Kings, chapter 2, we find Solomon, verse 19, Bathsheba therefore went unto King Solomon, to speak unto him for Adonijah. Now what did the king do? He's the king, sitting on a throne.

20:20 He's the chief chiefs in the land. He's the king. But now his mother comes into the room. What does he do? And the king rose up to meet her and bowed himself unto her and sat down on his throne and caused the throne to be set for the king's mother and she sat on his right hand. What did the king do? He rose up. His physical actions spoke to all of the tremendous respect and honor that he had in his heart toward his mother. He did not sit on his royal throne and form his arms and say, lovely to see you, mom. He rose up, the king, as an act, external, visual, physical act to demonstrate the disposition of honor to his mother that was in his heart. So we don't know whether the rising up of Proverbs 31 is this matter of an aggressive stepping forward or an expression of honor. But whatever it is, this much is clear.

21:28 They do rise up, whether it's one or the other or a combination of both. And this generation needs to know and hear me carefully, children, such things are not the antiquated antics of old stuffed shirts from another generation. The external, visible, physical symbols of respect and honor are the symbols of a civilized as opposed to a pagan society. Furthermore, they are the cherished manifestations of a vital and practical godliness that still exists among the people of God. Children who truly appreciate, and honor their praiseworthy moms will unashamedly demonstrate this in the way they posture themselves in the presence of their mothers. Even if you're mocked out by others,

22:35 you will rise up, rising up, stepping forward, taking the posture that indicates in all of its nuances, your respect and your honor for such a worthy woman. Then the second thing they do is they call her blessed, or they bless her. Either translation fits the structure and the significance of the original. This part of the verse moves from the physical posture to their words. And when the children take the initiative to speak to her in an evident posture of honor and respect, they call her, usher. That is, they call her, blessed one. They recognize that she has been graced by God to be what she is, and to do what she does. They unreservedly praise and honor her with their lips. They see that

23:38 what she is and does is the fruit of God's grace and therefore, they are glad, not only to assume the various postures of honor and respect and aggressiveness in stepping forward to speak on her behalf, but they speak of her in terms of her being a blessed woman. A woman who is what she is and does what she does because of the favor of God that rests upon her and resides in her. Now let me say a word of application to all the sons and daughters of any age who have living virtuous mothers. Speaking to all the sons and daughters of any age who have living virtuous mothers. This description is a divine prescription. It is a divine mandate as to your duty and mine. You are to make it evident to all by your body language, posture, and words that you respect and honor your praiseworthy mother. You are to cultivate

24:48 the inexpensive habit of opening your mouth and telling your mom. You are thankful that she is blessed of God, so blessed of God that she has stuck her fingers in her ears to all of the cacophonous and continuous bombardment of the world's philosophy that a woman is a fool who buries her life in her husband, in her home, and in her house. And you see a woman who has dared to stand against all of that pressure. And you are under a solemn obligation and have the unspeakable prejudice of rising up and saying, she is what she is, and she does what she does because she is blessed of God. And I am determined, no matter how much my siblings may be silent, no matter how much my peers may mock the idea, by the grace of God, I will do what God says I ought to do to give that present temporal reward to my mother for the virtuous woman she has become and is by the grace of God. Now, is it a big deal if you don't do this? Yeah, it is. I want you to

26:10 turn back to Proverbs 30 and I want you to look at verse 11. There is a generation, that curse their father and bless not their mother.

26:31 The old catechism is right when it says, what is sin? Sin is any transgression of or lack of conformity unto the law of God. Sins of commission, when we step over the boundaries of God's law. Sins of omission, when we do not fill up the boundaries. Look at the parallelism here. There is a generation that curse their father. Now, if you heard somebody cursing his father, what would you say? You'd say he's an ungodly wretch.

27:02 God pronounces some horrible things upon such people. Look at verse 17. The eye that mocks at his father and despises to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley will pick it out and the young eagle shall eat it. What gross language.

27:17 God says, you speak disrespectfully to your mother and father. I'll so judge you you won't have a decent burial. You'll lie on the open ground and when birds come, birds of prey, these birds, the first thing they do to make sure the carcass is dead is they pick at the eye. And God says you'll have buzzards picking your eyeballs out. That scares me with this. And I want you to see what is parallel to that in verse 11. There is a generation that curse their father and in the same tent are those who are mute about blessing their mother.

27:57 It's wickedness. Pull back the blessing your virtuous mother deserves. I'm not overstating my case. That's Bible, folks.

28:12 God puts you in tragically wicked company if you are mute about speaking with these lips and affirming by your body language that you honor your virtuous mother.

Present Source of Praise: Her Husband

28:30 Now I give a word to the fathers among us. Part of Ephesians 6.4 nurturing our children is that by precept and example we rise up and bless our wives and the mother of our children so that while our sons and daughters may be too young to understand how they are to bless them, they see the example in us and furthermore, we teach them that it is their duty and long before it flows out spontaneously, we make them do it so that when grace has taken hold of them and they get old enough to really appreciate how blessed their mothers were of God to be virtuous wives and mothers and homemakers and they will spontaneously desire to do it, a channel has been cut in their psyches and in their souls by the meticulous training you as a husband and father have given by example and precept. As long as you're under my roof, you're going to rise up and you're going to bless your mother. Get that look off your face. It's a look of dishonor. You rise

29:40 up. That means you take body language that speaks of honor. You don't roll your eyes when your mother speaks. You don't give a sigh of exasperation when your mother speaks. I don't understand a father who will tolerate his wife and mother of his children being disrespected by his children. It's utterly, utterly inexcusable. You fathers, you have a keen eye and look to see, are my children rising up? Is their posture, are the little physical actions demonstrating they honor that woman who is my wife and their mother? Do I see my sons quick to open the door for her? Do I see my sons quick to run to the stove when there's a pot of boiling water and say, no, no, mom, let me take care of that? Do I see my sons quick by their physical posture and actions honoring their virtuous mother? If not, changes are going to be made. That's your

30:41 responsibility, dad. Nurture them. You must nurture them. You must train them to obey this text.

30:50 The children shall rise up and shall call her blessed. But then there's a second present source of praise and affirmation of this worthy, virtuous wife, mother and homemaker, and that's her husband. Look at the text.

31:09 Children rise up and call her blessed. If you have a good translation, you'll see you've got in italics the word her husband also, and he praises her in italics saying, the stripped down literal rendering of the Hebrew is, her children rise up and call her blessed or bless her. Her husband, and he praises her. Well, her husband what? You see, it harks back to what the children do. They rise up and they bless her. He also rises up and he praises her. He rises up. That's the first thing he does.

31:52 As with the children, there is a physical evidence of the disposition of respect, a stepping forward, or a manifestation of respect in all the little symbols of that respect. So this husband does the same. He is the one anxious to show by his posture and his external symbols how much he honors her. He still walks around the table to pull back the chair to seat her at the table.

32:27 Oh, you say, Pastor, cut off.

32:32 What do you have to do to do that? You've got to rise up, don't you? You've got to get up from your comfortable chair and say, my comfort for a moment takes second place to the honor of my wife.

32:47 Why was it done in a bygone generation?

32:55 Because it became an acceptable symbol in our civilized society that had great impress from biblical perspectives that it was a very convenient, lovely expression of honor. You're coming up to a door, no dear. I don't know how many times many of you will bear witness to this. We've got women in this place. Don't expect men to open the door for them. I have to scold them and say, hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, this gentleman here, don't you put your hand on that door. Allow me.

33:31 That's shameful. I shouldn't have to do it in this place. Shouldn't have to take the coat of women down in this foyer while the husbands stand around having fellowship. It's disgraceful, men.

33:45 You're to rise up and in every way that's not ridiculous, seize upon the opportunity to show by your physical actions you honor this virtuous and noble wife and mother and homemaker. As I've had occasion to tell many of you, most of us will live and die and never rescue our wives from a burning building. I've been married 46 years. I haven't once caught my wife when she was thrown off a parapet like Superman caught her.

34:18 I haven't once rescued her from a burning building or put myself under a car that fell on her and got an adrenaline rush and was strongly sick. No, no. Live and die and probably never have to do it is the accumulation of all the little symbols that tell her she's a woman of worth. Yes, dear.

34:40 Thank you, dear.

34:43 Rise up. Open the door. Put on the coat. Walk around and open the car door for her. All of those little things are the symbols. I honor this woman. You don't honor her. You've got a problem with me.

34:58 And I've got a problem with you.

35:01 These things are caught, men. Perhaps the reason your sons don't manifest them, they ain't catching them from you.

35:11 He rises up, but now he does something the children don't do. They bless her or they call her blessed, but he praises her. Her husband also and he praises her. One of the three or four major Hebrew words used for the praise of God.

35:32 He hallels her. That's what he does. He praises her. And how does he do it?

35:40 Well, he gives an example. Look at verse 29. Her husband also and he praises her. Notice.

35:46 Many daughters have done worthily. And the Hebrew word there is the same one found in verse 10. A worthy woman who can find he says many daughters. Apparently there were more than one or two of them. He says many daughters have done worthily. There have been many who have done worthily, but you excel them all. Now let me ask you a question. Do you believe that sitting down with a mathematical mind this man really believed that of all the women who have ever breathed and lived and walked and died that there was no one who had the same combination of gifts and graces and diligence and virtue as his wife?

36:35 Hmm? Do you think he really believed when he says you excel them all? Well, if there's a contest in which we take all of the graces, all of the virtues, how they are manifested, you will come up at the top of the heap in every single category. Now, thinking like a mathematician and thinking clinically and thinking like a lawyer, do you think he would have come up to that conclusion and stated it?

37:02 I doubt it. This is the sanctified hyperbole of a loving, appreciative husband. Sanctified hyperbole. And notice he says it to her face, not about her and behind her back to others.

37:21 Her husband praises her, and here's a sample of how he praises her. He says, sweetheart, many daughters have done worthily. You do the best. You're the number one. He tells it to her. Now he knows when he does, she goes, dear, you know that that, but she loves to hear it. She loves to hear it. She knows perhaps in her own church women that have more virtues in a lot of areas than she does.

37:55 And she will deflect this kind of sanctified hyperbole, but down underneath she loves it. And it becomes part of the motive for which she presses on to become more and more what she ought to be. He praises her. He praises her to her faithfulness.

38:14 He indulges in sanctified domestic hyperbole. Now, by way of application, let me say this. A woman who fears God and out of her fear of God, which remember, causes her to live so that her greatest delight is the smile and the favor of God. Her greatest dread is the frown of God. She lives before the face of God. She's a woman who lives quorum Dei. She lives before the face of God. But nonetheless, as a God-fearing woman, out of, second only to knowing the approbation of God, and giving herself to a role of wife and mother and homemaker, there's a sense in which she doesn't care what the world thinks about her. She doesn't care what

39:00 the neighbors think about her. But she desperately longs to know that the man into whose life she has buried herself appreciates her. Now, let me ask you ladies, am I speaking the truth? Yes or no?

39:19 Hmm? Isn't that what you want? You want to know that this one whom I'm seeking to do good all the days of his life, he appreciates my efforts. He not only points out and helps me where I fall and, as my prophet, brings the word of God to bear upon me when I speak like a fool and when I act like a knave and a witch, and he lovingly rebukes me and rebukes me proves me, does all of that. But this much I know that he praises me to my face. And he even uses language I know is not true mathematically in an illegal court, but I sure love to hear it. I sure love to hear it. And I say to you men, I know many of you have had no models in your fathers.

40:09 So what? Are you determined to break the cycle or pass it on to another generation of being a mute man who won't praise your wife? Raising mute sons who will never praise their mothers or their wives. Somebody has got to rear back on his high legs and say, this is going to end with my generation by the grace of God.

40:37 It'll stick in the throat of some of you. You're so unaccustomed to doing it the first time you do it, you'll feel like you're swallowing your tonsils if you haven't had them removed.

40:51 I'm having trouble getting this out. But what I want to say is that, well, it's not exactly...

41:01 Come on, get out. I think you're the greatest. You say, hey, that didn't kill me. That didn't kill me.

41:11 I think maybe I could do that another time. And another time. The text says that this is part of the reward she receives in this life. Her husband also praises her saying, many daughters have done worthily, but you excelled them all.

Present Source of Praise: The Community of God's People

41:34 Now not only are her children and her husband the source of her present praise and affirmation of her worth, but thirdly, her present source, children, husband, the community of the people of God. Look at verse 31. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates. Now what are those words mean? Two things are laid out as imperatives. The generic duty prescribed, give her of the fruit of her hands. We might paraphrase, give her the reward her labor has earned. Give back to her some of the results of her arduous labor with her hands, and give it back to her in any way appropriate to what good she's done for you. Now that could have

42:27 a hundred applications. But Lemuel is saying that all who have benefited from her virtuous labors, husband, children, the needy in the community, and a woman like that doesn't categorize and say, I've done some good to my husband today, good to my children, good to a few needy people. She is a constant stream of beneficence and benevolence and kindness of word and deed. And so he calls upon the whole community of God's people, give her of the fruit of her hands.

43:06 Give her back in kind the benefits you've received from her. A New Testament parallel would be Galatians 6.6 Let him who is taught in the word communicate to him who teaches in every good thing. Or 1 Corinthians 9. You shall not muzzle the ox when he treads out the corn. In other words, the animal that is treading out the corn should be able to dip his mouth in and eat some of the corn. Give her of the fruit of her hands. Her works of benevolence and kindness have enriched you.

43:36 Let some of that come back to her in appropriate expressions of appreciation. That's the generic duty prescribed, but now look at the specific duty enjoined in the last part of the verse. Give her of the fruit of her hands and let her works praise her in the gates. Now what's this mean?

43:58 As we saw in opening up verse 23, her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. The city gates, the town gates were the place where the elders would gather. And there they would deliberate about the affairs of the city or the town. There they would wrestle with issues and make their decisions.

44:18 It was to the city gates that you would gather the people to make pronouncements with respect to city or town policy or some of the judgments of the elders. So what Lemuel is saying is not only generically, give her of the fruit of her hands whoever in the whole community, starting with husband and children and needy people and neighbors who have received the benefit of her virtuous hands, give back to her in kind what she's given to you in all the appropriate ways. But in addition to that, let her works praise her in the gates. Among the people of the community that they see in her her virtues and her worth and there let her be praised. Here we come back again you see to this matter of legitimate praise and honor being given. Now for us, that community is not Montville, it's not Lincoln Park, it's not any community in which you live. The community to which we belong.

45:34 Where these virtues are known and loved and appreciated is the church. And it's we who gather as the people of God who constitute the community at the gates. And it is in that setting that virtuous women are to be affirmed and praised and appreciation is to be expressed with respect to their great worth. Now remember, I began the whole series with two qualifying principles.

46:11 Remember what they were? According to the scriptures there is legitimate dignity, nobility and usefulness for women outside the realm of marriage, mothering and home making. And I haven't forgotten that qualifying principle. And secondly, some women choose or are providentially shut up to a life of singleness in which they can do great service for the kingdom of God and others.

46:43 And I haven't forgotten that. So you who are not wives and mothers and home makers don't think I've forgotten you. I haven't. You've been much in my mind through the whole series.

46:57 But since we are dealing with women and home maker I'm calling upon this community, this assembly at the gates to labor at having more and more a climate in which our godly wives and mothers and home makers who give themselves to those roles and responsibilities against all the prevailing pressure and tide of society they will all feel like queens when they step in this community. They'll feel queenly. They'll know that in this place they need never drop their heads when people say, what do you do for a living? I thank God I am a wife. And furthermore I am a mother and I am a home maker and I wouldn't trade places with the prime minister of England when it was Maggie Thatcher. That's what I'm talking about. Let her works praise her in the gates in the community where her values and commitments are known and understood and appreciated.

Future Source of Praise: The Lord Christ

48:14 Well, that's the present source of her praise. Three sources. Her children, her husband and the community of the people of God. But now very briefly I want you to note with me our second major heading the future source of this praise and affirmation of the worth of this praise.

48:36 I believe it's bound up in verse 30b. Grace is deceitful and beauty is vain but a woman and there the generic word is used Asha it can mean wife but it's the word translated generically woman throughout the Old Testament there is a more distinct word for wife that is used several times in the Hebrew Bible but it's generic in most of the translations even the most modern ones believing that it is to be understood more generically but a woman that fears the Lord she shall be praised. Now no doubt in the context the primary reference is to the present praise that comes from husband from children and from the community of God's people. However, the promise is surely not exhausted by that present source of praise and from the analogy of scripture we know that whatever praise is now granted legitimately for this virtuous wife and mother from children and husband and the community of God's people it is but a little down payment of the praise that truly counts that will be meted out in the last day from the God before whose face such a woman has lived. And I want you to see a passage that in my judgment nails this down without

50:04 question. It's in Colossians chapter 3. Colossians chapter 3 in what the scholarly New Testament commentaries call a litany of house rules New Testament house rules we have the apostle giving direction to wives to husbands, to children, to fathers then in verse 22 the apostle focuses upon slaves bond slaves people who are the property of their masters those who would be called upon to do what we would call the most demeaning of tasks my tasks are done because I'm the property of my master. Now what does he say to the servants? Servants obey in all things then that are your masters according to the flesh not with eye service as men pleasers but in singleness of heart. Now here we come fearing the Lord. Slaves

51:16 you must carry out your tasks as a slave quorum Dei before the face of God in the fear of God that is with your primary concern being the smile of God your primary dread being the frown of God it's not the smile of your earthly master that counts most it's not the frown of your earthly master that counts most it's the smile or the frown of your heavenly master do your task fearing the Lord and in that context this is what is to animate and motivate you verse 23 whatsoever you do work heartily as unto the Lord you see the fear of God doing it to know the smile of God not unto men knowing knowing that from the Lord you shall receive the reward of the inheritance you serve not your earthly master but you serve the Lord see what that would do to a slave who knows that his master owns him the master owns him I have no significance in terms of my personal identity I am property like he owns his cow and he owns his ox and he owns his

52:44 pigs he owns but he isn't my own ultimate owner somebody bought me with his precious blood he established me as his bomb slave when he threw over me the canopy of his pardoning grace and mercy wooed and won my heart to own him as my savior and my Lord and put his fear within my heart a promise of the new covenant I will put my fear in their heart so that they may not depart from me and now my great passion is to know his smile in all I do my great dread is to elicit his proud and I know in all that I do though the orders of my Lord are mediated through my master I do what my master tells me but I do it as unto my true master and I know this when I do a day of recompense is coming and my true master is going to say to me the slave well done good and faithful servant and Paul says that's what's to get down inside the spiritual gut of slaves that will make them do their work in such a way that people say hey boy what you doing I'm serving my master and he's not a very pleasant character don't you talk about my master well I see him he goes

54:12 about with a sour look on his face when he barks out his orders he's harsh he's you say your master's what are you talking about I'll tell you what I'm talking about you don't see my true master he's in heaven and he got there by way of a virgin's womb and a bloody cross and an open tomb and he purchased redemption for me and he has saved me by his grace and washed me in his blood and when you see me singing and going about the task of my rather unreasonable and often nasty earthly ruler what I am and what I do is because of my reference point of my true master in heaven who one day is going to say to me no matter what my earthly master might say he's going to say to me well done good and faithful servant that's what keeps me going now my dear wives and mothers and homemakers that's what you've got to fashion your soul to be thankful for any measure of that present praise and affirmation of your worth that comes from your kids and your husband and from the community of God's people but I've got news for you there'll be times when that's pretty swim pickings and if the only thing that fuels you is what you're getting from your kids your husband

55:40 and God's people you're going to be very unstable and there'll be times when you'll be full of resentment and say nobody appreciates me you're going to sing the old camp song nobody loves me everybody hates me I'm going out and eat worms fat ones skinny ones and all the rest that's where you'll feel that when your husband fails in his duty to speak to you to your face the sanctified domestic hyperbole when your kids are delinquent and when God's people just take for granted that you're just going to go on because you've always been going on what'll get you to get up the next morning and come to your tasks as wife mother and homemaker with a fresh sense of zeal and expectancy and joy I serve the Lord Christ and one day he's going to recompense me for all of my labors and if I can hear his well done it'll more than make up for all the times my kids have not risen up and called me blessed and all the times when my dear husband has failed to praise me and all the times when the covenant community has just forgotten and been delinquent all of that will pass in a moment when I see his face and I hear his words well done now you wives and mothers and homemakers

57:08 that's got to get right down in here by prayer and meditation and constant reflection and remembrance and you see the beauty of the Christian life is if that's what keeps you going then I speak a word to you who are widows widows by death widows by divorce you who are of marriageable age who are single you see this says the same thing to you God's providence has shut you up to a sphere of labor that is not that of wife of mother and of homemaker but whatever that sphere is Christ blood bought claims over you are exactly the same as they are over the woman sitting next to you who is wife and mother and homemaker you are called upon to live in the fear of Christ and living in the fear of Christ means that in your sphere that takes up the hours of your day though not directly related to your husband your children and your home it has as much nobility and dignity before God as those of that wife and mother and homemaker and when you discharge them in the fear of Christ and you remember these words from the Lord himself I shall receive the

58:37 recompense of the reward then you won't have a situation as I found in some circles where widows and single women of marriageable age are reckoned as second class citizens because they aren't wives and mothers and homemakers and may God grant that that will never never be true in this place because it's utterly unbiblical and every woman fulfilling her God given calling having embraced her identity as a woman who has prayed out and pleads to be immunized from all of the nonsense of feminism that in the so called interest of liberating a woman take her into the path of bondage by making her something other than what God intended a woman may be and should be when you embrace from the heart your identity as a woman yes if you don't have the canopy of a husbands protection and you don't have the natural conduit for your maternal instincts with children and what goes with that in home yes you're more vulnerable at places yes God knows that and not only are you more vulnerable you're more frustrated at times yes God knows all about it but you live before the face of God and you'll receive the recompense of the reward from the Lord Christ

Application to the Unconverted and Concluding Exhortation

60:07 and I close by saying a word to those of you sitting among us this morning who do not live before the face of God you know what the crowning mark of every unconverted man woman boy or girl is according to Romans 3 18 Paul's been proving chapter after chapter verse after verse getting inside people's consciences reasoning with demonstrating that all have sinned and come short of the glory of God and when he gives the distillation of passages out of the prophets and the Psalms describing what sinners are in the concreteness of their mouths and their feet and their hands it's an ugly description then he puts as the capstone in Romans 3 18 these words and there is no fear of God before their eyes you know why you live the way you live it's because there's no fear of God before your eyes you do not live with your great passion being I live before the face of God you'd like to scrub out every remembrance of the face of God because you know this face is against you in your sin and in your impenitence and in your unbelief well my unconverted friend if you've come to no other conclusion as a result of what you've heard today I hope you've come to this persuasion if I ever become a Christian I'm going to have to take God seriously in every part of my life and that brings us around full circle to where I began this series as some of you can remember

61:36 back 18 messages ago I said I was compelled to bring it for two reasons and the second one was this because the goal of God in the gospel demanded it and I took you right to Titus 2 after Paul gives detailed instruction about these very issues and what the younger women are doing training the older women in training the younger women he says the whole purpose of all of this is because the grace of God has appeared bringing salvation to all men teaching us that denying ungodliness and worldly lusts we should live soberly righteously and godly in this present evil age looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and savior Jesus Christ who gave himself for us that he might redeem us from all iniquity purify to himself a peculiar people zealous of good works the cross of Christ is central to all that we've considered Christ died that we might have virtuous wives and mothers and homemakers with a virtue defined not by the world but by the spirit of Christ in the word of holy scripture and my friend if you're not a Christian and you're contemplating well what's it mean to become a Christian you don't become a Christian by becoming a good wife and homemaker mother no no no become a Christian by coming in the nakedness of your sinfulness

63:05 to a savior who died that sinners might be righteously pardoned might be powerfully transformed by his grace into a life that is well pleasing to him regardless of what your role in life may be all that we've considered today and in the previous studies grows out of the tap roots of the cross of Christ and I want to take us there as we conclude the series Jesus died to have this kind of wife and mother and homemaker in this place in your home that's what he died for among many other things that's what he died for may God grant that drawing upon his grace we will internalize the things we have learned and that God will help you men and you boys and girls Jesus died that your wife and mother might be praised by you while she's still alive if you don't praise her in that sense you are frustrating some dimension of the death of Christ I hope that will loose your tongue that will put it in its redemptive context I must not frustrate as Paul says the grace of God but I must by my tongue loosened by my bodily postures demonstrating honor

64:31 and praise rise up call her blessed praise her and let her works be the monument of all that God has made her for our good and for his glory let's pray our father we are so thankful that we have the scriptures as a lamp to our feet and our light to our pathway and as we have considered this portion of your word this morning we ask that your holy spirit would come upon us giving us grace rightly to understand and quickly to obey we pray that even this day sitting around some of the tables of our homes there would be some fruit of repentance some fruit of new obedience may there be wives and mothers and homemakers who show up here tonight with a fresh glow upon their faces because they have received something of the fruit of their hands even this day Lord deliver us from delayed obedience which we know is disobedience help us to say with the psalmist I made haste and delayed not to keep your precepts help us father as children and men that we will not delay to obey what we have learned from the word this morning seal your word then to all of our hearts and to your name be the praise and honor

65:58 through Jesus Christ