Objections to Sexual Identity, Part 2

Review of the Series: Male and Female Identity, Roles, and Functions

0:03 This Adult Sunday School class was held on August 14, 1988, at the Trinity Baptist Church in Montville, New Jersey.

0:13 Particularly for the sake of our visitors, so that they will not be totally at a loss as to what we are presently studying in this adult class, let me seek to bring into focus in a few minutes the heart of what we have discovered together from the Scriptures over the course of our 17 previous lessons. We are dealing with the very broad and general theme of crucial issues facing the people of God, and we set the field of concern for this theme by a careful, inductive study of Romans 12, 1 and 2 that took us a number of weeks, the heart of that directive being that out of gratitude for God's grace, we as the Lord's people are to present ourselves a living sacrifice unto God and to the people of God. And are to seek to live out in our experience the good, acceptable, and perfect will of God, and the only way we can do that is by a constant spiritual and mental exercise of non-conformity to the patterns of the world's thought, and constant conformity to the patterns of the thought of God as revealed in Scripture. Then we took up the first of these crucial areas.

1:33 And we have, for a number of weeks, been examining this area together from the Scriptures. And that area is male and female identity, roles, and functions. The first major issues that we established from the Scriptures were these. Number one, the areas of essential equality between males and females.

1:57 And there we rooted around primarily in Genesis chapter 1. Then we considered...

2:03 We considered, secondly, aspects of creative distinctiveness. And there we rooted around primarily in Genesis chapter 2. And we saw that in the very texture of the creation account, God has woven threads which clearly set out maleness and femaleness in very concrete ways. And then, thirdly, we considered the reality of redemptive equality, in Galatians 3.28, in terms of standing and position and privilege in Christ, there is neither male nor female. Now, with those foundational issues conditioning all that follows, and in no way contradicting them or overturning them, we established the truth of male headship and female subordination as a general biblical principle, by a careful study of 1 Corinthians 11, and verse 3. And that is the verse that clearly tells us that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of Christ is God, and the head of the woman is the man.

3:19 And here is a divinely established hierarchy, and it is a theological matter. It is not cultural. It is certainly not the projection of the evil and selfishness, or the outage desires of men to dominate women. It is the plan and purpose of God that this hierarchy should be established.

3:42 And then we went into three major areas in which we see this hierarchy fleshed out in particulars. We went into the area of the home, or the domestic sphere, and we looked at the pivotal passages, Ephesians 5, Colossians 3, 1 Peter 3, and then in the realm of the church, 1 Timothy, 2, 1 Corinthians 14, and then some secondary passages, and then in what we call general appearance and bearing and demeanor. And there our pivotal passage was 1 Corinthians 11, verses 5 and following. So whatever the hair covering, and short hair, long hair, whatever those things mean, it is clear that they have significance in terms of men and women manifesting in their appearance and demeanor and bearing, that they are carrying with joy and with dignity their distinctive sexual identity. Now, I gave you in about seven minutes the fruit of about 13 or 14 hours of study together. Now, last Lord's Day we began to examine the major objections to this Biblical teaching and their Biblical refutation. You see, we have established the general principle of male headship and female subordination.

The Necessity of Refuting Objections to Biblical Teaching

5:07 We have seen its application in the home, in the church, in general appearance and bearing. And before we descend into more particulars, what is distinctive masculinity and femininity in spirit, in attitude, in dress? We must clear away the objections that, no doubt, many of you have been subjected to. Someone confessed to me just this past week.

5:34 It wasn't until this series that they ever had some of their most fundamental concepts of some of these things challenged head on. So we need to deal with the objections so that if any of this is sticking in our throats, because our throats have been constricted through the world's influence, we want to get them open so we can swallow down everything we've seen from the Word of God before applying it in further particulars. And so we began last week to consider the major objections to this Biblical teaching and their Biblical refutation. And I asked the class this question.

6:15 And I'm going to get a signal from Bill if I haven't yet. I don't have this on. I've gone back to this thing. Some of you know my feelings about this, and it's a standing joke.

6:25 But we're going to try it out anyway. I will be obedient. I'm a man under authority when I'm in touch with sound equipment. All right.

6:33 Are we coming through now, Bill? I'm sorry. I've just got out of the habit of clicking that thing off. All right.

6:38 I asked the class, why did I have to take up this aspect of our study, the major objections to this Biblical teaching and their Biblical refutation? And the class rightly answered that it is my duty as an elder to do so. According to Titus chapter 1 and verse 2, verse 9, elders are not only to exhort in the sound doctrine, but they are to convict. They are to shut the mouths of gainsayers.

7:06 And then another person brought up Acts 20, 28 and following, and rightly so, where Paul, charging the elders, says, you are to be watchful because there are wolves from without and perverse men from within who will seek to undermine the health and the well-being of the flock of Christ. So then, under the control of God, under the restraint of the Word of God, we took up the first two objections last week and their Biblical refutation. And can someone just tell me what the first objection was, what we called it? The objection of what?

Refutation of the Evolutionary and Inferiority Arguments (Recap)

7:44 What did we, how did we identify it? Yes. Of the evolutionary argument. The evolutionary argument that basically states that man somewhere, somehow, at some time, began, as some kind, or another little spark of life, and over millions of years, ever moving onward and upward to something better, the whole concept, the reality of male and femaleness, somehow got into the evolutionary stream of things.

8:14 And for a while, when man had to be the hunter and the wife had to stay in the cave and nurse her little cave babies, you had distinct roles. A strong, aggressive, protecting, providing male, and the more docile, protected, domesticated female. But we've outgrown that. We've come a long way, baby, you see.

8:35 That's the whole thrust that's behind that. It assumes the evolutionary concept, and then we saw that the basic answer is the beauty and the dignity, the wonderful simplicity of the creation record, which indicates that from the very beginning, no human being knew any existence except as a male or a female. God said, let us make man in our image, and after our likeness, in the image of God created he him, male and female created he them. And that is our fundamental answer to the evolutionary argument.

9:15 And then we took up and concluded with the inferiority argument. The argument that says, if there is a position of subordination for the woman and of headship for the man, this automatically means that the woman is inferior. And we saw from the word of God that distinct roles does not mean one is inferior to the other, but mysteriously, gloriously, wonderfully different, distinct. Not inferior any more than we can say the squirrel is inferior to the bird because he cannot fly, or the bird is inferior to the squirrel because he cannot fly or swim. And then we use the silly illustration, you remember, of the bass, and of the squirrel that got envious of the bass and ended up being drowned in his envy. Well, now we come to the third major objection, from without. We're dealing now with objections that come from the world without.

Introduction to the Religious Repression Argument

10:25 Then we shall take up the objections that come from within the church or within the professing church of Christ. And this third argument is probably one of the most subtle, one of the most anti-Christian, and one of the most frequently repeated and oft-projected arguments. It's what I'm calling the religious repression argument. We've looked at the evolutionary argument and its biblical answer.

10:56 Secondly, we've looked at the inferiority argument and its answer. Now we're going to look at the religious repression argument and its answer. Now let's identify the substance of this argument. What is it?

11:15 Well, it goes something like this. All subordination is of its very nature oppressive and repressive. A woman in a position that is antithetical, contrary to her highest fulfillment, highest expression of womanhood or terminology, her personhood. The Bible is to be blamed fundamentally for all of this repression and oppression.

11:54 For you see, it is the Bible written by men which is exclusively massed in gender and in concept. The light of that is found in the fact that men who wrote the Bible describe God as being in three persons, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, and they don't even have a distinctively feminine person in the Trinity. Now you see how sexist is this biblical doctrine of God. God is not Father-Mother, but He is Father.

12:39 Christ is not Son-Daughter, but He is Son. And the Holy Spirit is never referred to as She, but always with the masculine pronoun He. So what could be more sexist than to have to be a revelation of God and it oozes and drips with male prominence. It is a kind of pervasive religious male.

13:07 Furthermore, it is the religion of the Bible which teaches this concept of hierarchical structure, that the woman is to be the keeper at home and submissive to the man, that the man is to be the leader, the loving leader and head of his wife and of his family. It is this teaching of the Bible that is the great outlet of all the repression and the oppression that has come to women. And therefore, if we have any compassion upon women, any concern for the personhood of women, surely we will want nothing to do with the religion of the Bible that is so purely sexist, written by men, dominated with male concepts of the deity, dominated with concepts of the marriage relationship in which the man calls the shots, the woman is made his doormat, let's be done with every last vestige of it. Now that, in essence, and that is not caricature, that in essence is the religious repression argument. Now how many of you have heard or read anything that at least looks like that, first cousin or twin sister or anything? All right, so you see, for those of you that can't see the hands, about three quarters of the hands went up immediately,

Prong 1: Admit the Reality of Distortion

14:36 so I'm not creating a straw dummy or a straw man. Now, what is our refutation of that argument? And here you're going to work as a class. I have four prongs to the refutation of this argument.

14:52 The first one may seem rather strange, but I believe it's vital that we recognize it, and to find our way to it, I'm going to ask you as a class the question, and for the sake of our visitors, it's our practice that we ask that only our members, and you who are members of a sister church with us, are welcome to raise a hand, and I'll acknowledge you by name, and then you will make your contribution. My question is this. Do you think there is any substance or validity to this religious repression argument at all? Yes or no, and then be prepared to support your answer.

15:34 Not necessarily from scripture, but from your own observation and conviction. Is there any substance or validity to this religious repression argument that it is the Bible that is pervasively sexist? It is the Bible's teaching on male and female relationships in the home and in the church and general appearance and bearing that has resulted in the oppression of women, the demeaning of women? Is there any substance whatsoever to the argument?

16:06 Yes or no? All right, Jerry. All right, so in terms then of what the Bible actually says, you would say there's no real substance to the argument, if I hear you rightly. Okay?

16:32 Someone want to agree with him or disagree with him? All right, Phil. Where people rest instruction in finding the way the doctrine is interpreted in different churches and different religions, it can be imposed on women that they're less important than men or they're not. But their purpose in life is not as dignified as a man.

17:00 All right, so what you're saying then is that though the Bible itself is not repressive, there are some who interpret it and work it out in practice in such a way that indeed it is repressive. Is that what you're saying, Phil? I don't want to put words in your mouth. Is that what you're saying?

17:19 Okay, now if that's so. See, that's why I like to call on our members. I know how when they're saying something, what they're saying, when you've spent hours usually over the course of years in various counseling relationships, you understand your sheep. All right, now, then what you are saying, Phil, is that there is some substance to this argument.

17:42 Well, if I understood the question correctly, you said is there any problem in the Bible itself. No, there's not. No, my question was this. Do you think there's any substance or validity to the charge?

17:53 The charge is made, and its religion is the cause of repression and oppression of women. Is there any substance to that charge? Now, you've said, okay, so no substance in women that went around in the presence of men with no makeup on, made it very evident with their dowdy clothes and everything else they were to be not looked upon except pitied that they looked like they were dressed for their own funeral and drawn in and fearful. Have you ever seen women like that? I've seen them. It's a horrible thing.

18:49 Have you ever been in a home where a man never said, honey, what do you think about this? Just said, whoop! The poor wife is right in the middle of cooking a meal or cleaning up the...

19:03 No consideration. He just pulled rank, told everyone. You ever been in a home like that? Now, suppose you're one of these people who's heard the religious repression, oppression argument and you see something like that.

19:15 What immediately is triggered? You say, huh, these people say they believe the Bible and live by the Bible? This guy was so utterly insensitive in his wife's situation. Or they come into a church where all the women are dressed like a funeral about to happen and pasty-faced and clothes that are dowdy and out of style, nothing that is attracted in the color course, no ordination, as though God were a god, drabness.

19:42 The Garden of Eden must have been painted with military olive green. God must have spray-painted the whole garden. Otherwise, you know, Adam and Eve just might have, ooh, look at that beautiful flower and see things of beauty. That's of the devil, attractiveness.

19:59 You been around people like that? I have. I've seen whole churches where all the women reflected a repression and the development of their aesthetics in their appearance. And that was done in the name of apostasy, like a funeral about to happen.

20:30 You see, there is some substance to the argument. It still is indicated that people have and misapplied and distorted the teaching of the word of God. When we meet someone who brings up this argument, the first thing you ought to do is to admit of the biblical teaching. Say to this person, look, not everyone who claims to believe and follow the Bible follows it accurately or with balance.

21:09 And it is no different with the biblical teaching of male headship and female subordination than with the great doctrine of justification by faith apart from the works of the law. What do some people do with that glorious doctrine that I am saved by the doing of another? They say, well, then my doing means nothing. I can live like the devil and still go to heaven.

21:34 Now, what they have done is taking a biblical doctrine and they have distorted it. And we need to admit that some have distorted that doctrine and say, let us do evil that grace may abound. Don't ever feel that you need to force facts to fit what ought to be when the facts indicate what ought to be is not always what is found in reality. So admit to someone who may be making this objection to you the reality of the distortion of the biblical teaching because Titus 1.16 says there will always be those who profess to know God but by their works and there will be those who profess to embrace the biblical teaching of man's headship a headship to be reflective of the tender, sensitive, considerate, self-giving love of Christ to the church. But all they know of headship is the headship of an angry, cruel, sour drillmaster who boots the guys in the butt at 4.30 in the morning and says, feet on the floor! That's the way they run their wives, run their children, run their homes

23:02 and it's a stench in God's nostrils because it's all been done in the name of biblical headship. So let's admit the saints of God are not perfect in any area and you do no good to the cause of truth trying to defend it where you cannot capture the conscience of the one you're discussing the matter with. So disarm the thing and say yes, no doubt, no doubt there are some in the past and perhaps altogether too many in the day who do the biblical teaching. So that's the first part of your answer.

Prong 2: Challenge the Assertion and Demand Proof from Scripture

23:36 Admit the reality of the distortion of the biblical teaching. Now, the second, let me try to pull this one out of you. They have asserted that the Bible and the religion of the Bible exists that it automatically demeans women, subjugates women, oppresses and represses women and the Bible is full of such teaching. That's the allegation.

24:07 What should our answer to them be? If we admit that some do distort, then what should be the next thing we do? There's a little phrase, a little clause I use all the time here. He who asserts must what?

24:23 Must prove. All right. So what should you do then, Bart? Handle your Bible exactly and say, well, I don't claim to know my Bible perfectly but I've been a Christian for three years, four years.

24:37 Some of us can say by the grace of God 38 years. I've studied this Bible almost every day of my life, many times, hours on end. And you know, if it's so full of this, surely you should have no trouble showing me at least a few passages. Would you mind showing me some?

24:59 When people said, oh, I can't believe the Bible is full of contradictions. I said, well, if it's full, that means everywhere you turn you'll find some. I've been studying it for X number of years, never found the one. Will you show me one?

25:10 I just handed my Bible to them. Oh, well, I just . Well, you press the issue. Lovingly, sweetly, I smile, gently, but press the issue.

25:25 Say, all right, read my Bible that way. If it is sexist in that sense and oppressive, show me from the Word of God. Well, I . What they mean is I've heard somebody else say it who heard someone else say it who served one else say it who's supposed to know.

25:47 And then, therefore, they take it upon sheer authority of word of mouth. And they really haven't studied their Bibles for the most part. Now, we're going to deal with those who object from within who have studied their Bibles. They know every single passage that we've gone over and others.

26:02 And they've carefully examined them. And they spend their lives trying to prove the passage doesn't really mean what it obviously says and what the church understood it to mean for almost 2,000 years. So they know the passages those within. But we're talking about those without.

26:16 And we're talking about those without. And the great text that applies to them are the words of Jesus in Mark 12 and verse 24. Do you remember when they came and they thought they really had the Lord Jesus back to begin the walk? They figured we really got Him now.

26:34 And so they nailed Him with that question about that poor woman that went through seven husbands. And I always chuckled when they said after the seven she died. And I thought well, why might she having to live through the experience of being married to seven different men? It might have been that she died after the third one.

26:55 But it says she finally died. Then they thought now we got the zinger. Verse 23. If there's such a thing as a resurrection of the body in the resurrection whose wife shall she be of them for the seven had her to wife.

27:09 And I can just see the smirk on their face. We got Him. We really got Him now. And what did the Lord do?

27:15 The Lord answered and said it is for this cause that you err that you do not know He said you're ignorant of the Bible. So after you've handed your object to your Bible or you've said if you don't have a Bible handy well really I've studied my Bible for a number of years. I go to a church where it's expounded many times verse by verse chapter by chapter and I do not see especially this is powerful if you are a woman I do not see that this book has made me a repressed and an oppressed woman. I'm treated with dignity by my husband by the men of the church my friend I really believe your problem is you've never really studied the Bible and like Jesus said to those objectors in His day you err not knowing the scriptures. So you must point out the necessity for them to prove their assertion from the Bible. They are making an accusation the Bible is the great perpetrator of this repressive oppressive doctrine. The Bible is a view of women and it's filled with it.

Prong 3: Demonstrate the Facts from Scripture

28:30 You challenge them to bring forth proof and if they cannot then you must lovingly do what Jesus did charge them with ignorance and challenge them to begin to study the word of God for itself and not allow others to prejudice their minds against it while their minds are ignorant of its context. Then following what would be the third line of our response to this repression oppression religion argument. Admit the reality of the distortion challenge the assertion and demand proof from the Bible now turning to the more positive what would be our third strand of response. All right Doug? The Holy Spirit movement controversy man with the Holy Spirit. All right Doug's point was that men wrote the scriptures but they were not men writing unaided by the direct ministry of the Holy Spirit and showed that behind the words of these men was the ministry of the Spirit

29:58 but in that very act what are we doing? We are now assuming what role Doug? The role of the what? Nothing mysterious.

30:07 Anyone? Barely enough. I've got Doug on the spot. Yes Kelly?

30:14 We're assuming the role of the teacher aren't we? Is there a verse that clearly states that an ordinary Christian certainly not one who just came out of the spiritual womb three days ago but given the fact that enough time has passed to be basically exposed to the heart and the broad issue of the Christian faith that every ordinary Christian has a duty to be an apologist for the Christian faith. That is every ordinary Christian has a duty to be prepared to answer objections to the Christian faith. Is there any verse in the Bible that says this is the duty not just of elders who must be able to convict the gainsayers but of ordinary Christians?

30:59 Can anyone think of a verse which lays that duty upon all believers? Tyrone? Now you've got it. 1 Peter 3 and verse 15.

31:09 Let's look at it. 1 Peter 3 and verse 15. In this context Peter is not right to be an apologist for the Christian faith but to be an apologist for the Christian faith. He's not writing to elders.

31:22 He's not writing to deacons. He's not writing to fellow apostles. He's writing to all of the brethren. Look at verse 8.

31:33 1 Peter 3 8. Finally be all like man minded compassionate loving as brethren. So now he's addressing the brotherhood of all believers males and females. And he goes on to say in this exhortation one in which he recognizes that the believers were suffering for righteousness sake.

31:58 Verse 13. Who is he that will harm you if you be zealous of that which is good? But even if you should suffer for righteousness sake blessed are you and do not fear their fear neither be troubled. But sanctify in your hearts Christ as Lord.

32:17 That is continually set apart Christ in your heart in his own rightful place as your absolute sovereign and as your sovereign the great pattern and example you are to follow the one whose word is to be law in your life. In that sense we sanctify Christ is Lord. We don't have the rightful place in our hearts that belongs to him. That is what it means to sanctify in our hearts Christ as Lord. Now notice what should accompany that. Being ready always to give answer to every man that asks you a reason concerning his rightful place in our hearts which means in this context men determined to take their place of God assigned headship in the manner mandated by God in the home in the church in general appearance

33:45 and bearing that's the word and law doesn't make wimps and tyrants it makes godly assertive men of steel and the velvet. That's what his word makes. Women it means you take your rightful place of subordination to male headship in general but then particularly in the home in the church concerning that aspect of your experience of your walk as a believer. So that this text does indeed lay upon every believer the duty of being an apologist for the Christian faith. In the context the specific thing being addressed is the biblical response. Why is it? You can be joyful in the midst of opposition and persecution when you didn't do anything wrong and the Christian says because the best is yet to come for me and it's even going to be better my reward will be greater in

35:14 heaven for the suffering of my sin. And if you are not willing to act well by way of application you see in this area in a context where the whole climate of society says well it's the religion of the bible that represses and oppresses women. You can be able to show commensurate with your own distinct personality and gifts these fundamental issues that we've hammered away week after week with our bibles open on our laps and that's why I've not chosen the straight lecture method. I wanted you to exegete the passages with your own bibles open so you could see what's going on with your bibles and what should you do? Go back over your notes in the class and start out by saying do you know that when God created male and female

36:44 he created them in the world then if you do that you can completely do that with your own mind and your own mind to the world and to the universe and to the down with them and open up Genesis 1 and say, no. How can you say the Bible is full of the repression and oppression of women when on its opening pages it dignifies womanhood and puts her on this equal plane with man as made in the image of God, accountable to God with all the stuff necessary to replace the earth and subdue it along with the man that God had made? You ought to get excited. I get the goosebumps just talking about the dignity of man in creation. Do you get excited about it? Are you able to sit down with someone?

37:53 You ought to. You'll like it. You'll get blessed in the doing of it. Then take them to chapter 2 as we did together and say, but now look, God takes the zoom lens on precisely how he made the male and female. From Genesis chapter 1 we only know that he made the male and female with these specific areas of equality. Now then, here's the zoom lens to show some distinctive differences in maleness and femaleness. When you read the opening parts of the chapter where God made the man out of the dust of the earth and God put the man in a garden and God gave the man a task and then God said, it's not good for the man to be alone. I will make a help. I will make a help. I will make a help. I will make a help. I will make a

38:44 helper answering to him. And then you show this person, now, is it repressive that God should lovingly provide a helper answering to man's need? How can that be repressive? Because, you see, if you look at it from this standpoint, it's a real ego-slaying thing for men. God's saying, hey man, with your big broad shoulders and with your hoxie-toxie brain and with your strong hands. You're in this garden. You don't have what it takes. By yourself. That's pretty humbling.

39:22 How can that be called repressive and oppressive when the very rationale for woman is the incompleteness of man? If anything, that puts men down. You see, women could rise up and have a put-down men movement by the perversion of that passage. You see, any passage can be perverted. Now, here's the glory of the woman. What was she made? As someone said, it wasn't Adam and Steve. But it was Adam and Eve. And it was Adam and Eve. And it was Adam and Eve. And it was Adam and Eve.

39:46 He said, I will make a helper answering to his need. He didn't make another man. He made a woman. And he made her out of the man, brought her to the man, to answer to the needs of the man. And he lovingly received her and said, this is now bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh. And you take that passage and you read it to them and show that here are the first strong hints. There are certain suggestions of distinctiveness of role and function embedded in the creation account. But there's nothing oppressive, nothing demeaning, nothing that puts women down. Say, now look, how can the Bible be full of such a doctrine when the first two

40:35 chapters are just the opposite? And the whole creation account ends with the description of man and woman in total nakedness of body, nakedness of soul, nakedness of body, nakedness of soul before God and one another in the bliss of Eden. How can anyone say the Bible is the mother and the father of all repression and oppression of women? Then take them to a passage like Proverbs 31, where there is a celebration of the nobility of womanhood.

41:07 Take them to portions in the Gospels where Jesus treats women with dignity, where a woman taken in adultery is not demeaned. And Paul, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very first, the very most rotten slut, but where our Lord forgives her and says, neither do I condemn you, go, sin no more. Where he talks with a woman with a checkered past and he knew her woman, knew that whole past, he didn't demean her as a woman, much less even as an immoral woman.

41:40 He lovingly, subtly, gently drew her out until she was asking about this water that one need not come and draw up his afterığın. from Jacob's well. And she ends up, you remember, being the instrument of the conversion of multitudes from her own hometown. Take her to those passages. Take her to the passages in the epistles of Paul where he speaks of women as his fellow workers in the gospel, where he's so concerned about two leading women in a church that forever women who would never have been known are known by every generation of Christians around the world, Iodius and Syntyche. Someone said Syntyche was too soon touchy. That's it. And there was a problem of a little friction there. But Iodius and Syntyche, look how he's, as

42:37 it were, ennobled womanhood by saying, even two women with a little friction grieves me. I beseech Iodius and Syntyche to be of the same mind in the Lord. Here an apostle assumes the posture of a holy beggar. I beseech. He doesn't say, I command. I beseech. I, an apostle, plead with these two women. Work out the little birds of friction between you. You see, a man is taking a position of nobility, beseeching these women. And the epistles are full of it. Be aware of those passages. Show them those passages. And then show them the glorious position of women in these specific passages. In the Ephesians 5 passage, where her submission is in the context of the submission of the church to Christ, who is the head and savior of the body. 1 Peter 3, where the submission of the wife is in the context of the husband giving honor unto her as the weaker vessel. Not oppressing her because she's weaker. Not demeaning her, but giving her honor as

43:49 the weaker. Recognizing her distinctiveness and giving her honor as a result of it. So the third part of our answer is to demonstrate the facts from Scripture, if they're willing to listen to you. All right? Now then, where we can, what should be the fourth and final part of our argument? But alas, not every Christian wife can use this fourth strand, but every Christian wife who has a Christian husband ought to be able to. And every woman in a well-ordered, biblically balanced church ought to be able to use this fourth strand of the argument. What do you think it is? Have I given you enough hints?

Prong 4: Validate the Facts from Personal Experience (Home)

44:34 We've admitted the reality of the distortion of the biblical teaching. We've challenged the assertion and demanded proof from the Bible and shown that there is no proof. They err not knowing the Scriptures. Then we seek to demonstrate, to be a good apologist of what the Bible actually teaches. But then, when and where we can?

44:54 And ideally, we all ought to be able to do this if we have a Christian husband and if we're in a well-ordered biblical church. And what is that? The fourth strand of our answer. All right? Tom? Okay. I used one different word. You said demonstrate. My heading is validate the facts from your own experience. Validate the facts from your own experience. Now, you men listen to me, because this is going to be very searching for you. If you're after clear faith in Christ, or if you're after little trouble, and you're going to know from a mastermind, I'll tell you why you that if you think about this.

45:33 Perfect. I was trying to this chapter. So. And finally, my dear neighbor friend, I want you to know that in my home, I make, no, I'm not at all embarrassed to say, I gladly own my husband as my head.

46:16 He, quote, wears the pants in this household. Oh, yes, I may have some slacks on because I've been doing outside work. But in terms of wearing the pants, he wears them. And there's only one pair of pants in that sense in this household.

46:31 And I'm glad that he has to wear them. Frankly, I'm glad that burden doesn't rest with me. I'm glad it rests with him and his headship far from being repressive and oppressive and grievous and demeaning. I find to be the very means through which I have come to appreciate the glory and the dignity and the wonder of being a woman.

46:57 And say it in such a way with such conviction of reality of experience. Experience that your face glows when you say it.

47:05 Now, let me ask you, husbands, do you dare to go home and ask your wife if she could use that fourth argument? If she could validate these facts from her own experience? I challenge you to go home this afternoon and say to your wife, honey, with judgment day honesty, lay it on me.

47:27 Hey, man, you man enough to do that? You say, pastor, I feel a little uncomfortable. Well, I want you to. We're not here to just ban the idea.

47:35 You know what your duty is, man. You're to love your wife as Christ loved the church.

47:44 And you're to take seriously getting on with that job and finding out wherein she believes you are not reflecting that sensitive, sacrificial, self-giving, considerate love of Christ to the church. I'll challenge you to spend a profitable Lord's Day afternoon saying to your wife, dear, with judgment day honesty, answer me. Could you use problem number four in the argument? Argument against the religious, oppressive, repressionist argument.

48:13 Could you say to the neighbor, not perfectly, but fundamentally and basically, could you say, dear, living with my husband, I've learned this position is not demeaning. It is not repressive. It is not oppressive. It's been the very framework within which I've come to begin to appreciate the dignity, the glory, the wonder of my identity.

48:38 As a woman, I'm going to switch, because you was. You ready to go home this afternoon and say to your husband, honey, with judgment day honesty, answer me. Has my loving, trustful submission to your headship made you feel that that headship is an awesome responsibility and a sacred trust that makes you jealous that you would not abuse it? That you would not?

49:17 Ignore it, that you would not refuse it? Does my trustful, loving submission make you feel both the burden and the glory of your manhood? I challenge you women to ask your husband that.

49:34 And if you've been a Christian for longer than a couple of years and been in a church where the Bible is taught and you can't have an affirmative answer either way, something's bad wrong. Somewhere you're not obeying the Bible. And somewhere you're being a hearer of the word and not a doer. And it's about time you stopped it.

Prong 4: Validate the Facts from Personal Experience (Church)

49:58 And then, of course, the closing element of this in the last couple of minutes is in our church life. You see, what is the church but the company of the new humanity? Where what is to be true individually in the home is, as it were, augmented and multiplied and manifested in the light of the church. As in the home, there is male headship.

50:21 Female headship, female subordination. So in the church. But if it is not repressive and oppressive in the home, neither should it be in the church.

50:31 So every single Christian woman in this church ought to be able to say to her neighbor when she's finishing up her cup of coffee and finishing up the fourth line of her answer to her objection. And I can tell you, in our church, you come for one week and it will be plain to you that it is dominated by male leadership. There will be no women standing up leading the service. There will be no women standing up and preaching.

50:59 There will be no women standing up and giving formal leadership. Yet, we feel that we are privileged women to have men who treat us with dignity. If we have a question about policy, we're not intimidated. We feel free to go to our leaders, elders and deacons or other men in the church who are mature and older and experienced.

51:24 We feel free to ask a question. We feel free to take one of our elders aside and say, Pastor, I just didn't understand the way you made that particular point in that passage. It just didn't carry my judgment. Could we talk about that?

51:39 We're not told, you're a woman, shut up. You're a woman, what voice do you have? We're treated with dignity. We're treated with nobility.

51:46 We are made to feel single women, married women, older women, younger women, attractive women, not so attractive women. We are made to feel. That we are indeed their sisters in Christ. And we sense that the men have embraced that God has elevated us to an equal status of spiritual privilege.

52:07 We don't feel demeaned. We feel liberated in Christ to be what God made us to be as women.

Practical Manifestations of Dignity and Conclusion

52:15 Now, I hope you women can say that in terms of your relationship to your leaders in this church, in relationship to men in general. That's why I'd like to see a little more. A little more of the symbols of that dignity and that honor to be shown women. God help us if it gets out of style in Trinity Church if a man sees a woman heading to the door to take a few quicker steps to get ahead of her and open the door for her.

52:43 God have mercy on us if it gets out of style to do those little symbols of courtesy. When you see a woman struggling to get her coat on, to drop what you're doing, take a few quick steps over. Take a coat rack and say, let me help you. To make her feel her dignity as a woman.

53:03 The whole climate in this place should ooze with the sense that the men are treating their sisters with all the dignity befitting those indwelt by the Holy Spirit, washed in the blood of Christ and placed in this body of Christ in the will and purpose of God. Well, I said this is probably the most crucial argument from without. And I was going...

53:28 I'm going to spend more time on it with you than any other. And I hope you now feel well-armed to be a good polemicist if anyone raises this third argument from without that the Bible and the religion of the Bible is that which has, excuse me, fostered repression and oppression upon women, therefore have nothing to do with the Bible's religion. The refutation, admit the distortion, challenge the assertion, demonstrate the facts and then validate the facts from your own experience. Let's pray and ask God to write his word upon our hearts.

54:09 Our Father, we're so thankful that you have given us a word which is indeed a lamp unto our feet and a light to our pathway. And we acknowledge, O God, that that word searches us, but we would not have it otherwise. And we pray...

54:31 I pray that in this vital issue of male roles and relationships, female roles and relationships, that we as the new humanity in Christ will manifest by our life, by our actions and words here in the assembly of your people, in our homes, in our most private, secret dealings with one another, that we have embraced from the heart that dignity, which you have given to women in their distinctiveness, that dignity you have given to men in their distinctiveness. O our Father, purge from us all worldliness of thought, all carnality of attitude and perspective, and grant that by your grace we may be a living monument of the lie that the Bible fosters an oppressive and a restricting role upon women. Grant, Lord, that that lie may be constantly exposed for what it is by the manner of our life together and by your word as we wisely minister that word to others. Hear us and answer us, we pray in Jesus' name. Amen.