Baptisms; General Guidelines for Weddings/Funerals

Introduction to Special Gatherings and Baptismal Services

0:05 Now, as we continue to consider the responsibilities and privileges of giving oversight to the corporate life of God's people, I would just remind you by way of introduction that we are presently concerned with dealing with directives for ordering the special gatherings of the people of God, and I suggested that those gatherings can be grouped under two subheadings, those mandated by the scriptures and those that are precipitated by cultural expectations. And in our last time together, we examined the principles that ought to be operative

0:47 as we seek to give oversight to the mandated gathering of the church for the supper of remembrance. Now, today we take up the second special gathering of the people of God mandated by the word of God, namely, for lack of a better term, baptismal services. And when we've completed that, we'll probably break at that point, and then we'll take up the second major division, that is, special gatherings precipitated by cultural expectations, under which category will come the matters of weddings and funerals. But now we come to the second of these gatherings,

Biblical Clarity on Baptism's Subjects and Mode

1:32 but not the ordinary gatherings for worship, but special gatherings for an activity mandated by the scriptures, namely, baptismal services. And once again, the freedom and liberty of the new covenant life and worship is clearly underscored in that we are given no specific directives, either by precept or apostolic example, relative to the details of precisely when and in what circumstances baptism should be performed. Now, on some matters, we believe

2:11 the scriptures are indeed clear, and these issues are treated more fully in your systematic theology course, but let me simply state them. It is our understanding that the scripture is clear as to the proper subjects of baptism. Matthew 28. Matthew 28.

2:32 Matthew 28 and 19, as our fundamental divine authorization to baptize, we see in that passage both the breadth of the baptismal mandate as well as the limits of it, make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them. And if you've done any careful exegesis of the passage, you know that the pronoun them agrees in number. Matthew 29. Matthew 29.

3:03 Matthew 29. And if you have never been involved in baptism, you may consider rejoicing in baptism, and baptizing them into the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost, teaching them to observe whatsoever I have commanded you. And if you have never read Alexander Carson's treatment of that text in his classic work on Baptism, Its Mode and Subjects, I urge you to read it. It is a masterful exposition.

3:33 and, I think, an unanswerable polemic for the position of baptizing only confessed and professed disciples of Jesus Christ. And then, in our understanding of the Scriptures, we do believe that the Scriptures give sufficient materials with respect not only to the proper subjects, but to the proper mode. It is universally agreed by respected linguists that baptizo and bapto at least have as one of their primary meanings to dip or to immerse.

4:12 It is acknowledged by many who practice what they call a baptism by sprinkling or washing or pouring that this was not the apostolic mode. And I could bring forward those quotes both from Calvary. And it's very interesting that to this day in the Greek Orthodox Church, they immerse their infants. Because to a Greek to say, I baptize, and then to do anything other but plunge the baby into the water would be for me to say to you, Mike, I strike you on the cheek.

4:54 And then to stroke his cheek, it would be utterly incongruous, the word with the action. So in the Greek Orthodox Church...

4:59 So they practice pedo-baptism. It is pedo-baptism, not pedo-rhino or rantizo. It is pedo-baptism. So we believe that the proper subjects in proper mode are matters in which there is clear biblical revelation.

Lack of Fixed Pattern for Baptismal Circumstances in the New Testament

5:20 But when we turn to the word for some light concerning the specific circumstances in which people ought to be baptized, we find no fixed pattern either by apostolic precedent, practice, or precept. And here I want very quickly to go through with you the incidents recorded in the New Testament in which it is said that people were baptized. And what we will see is that there is no fixed pattern or precedent in the subject or in the matter. It is a matter of the circumstances of baptism.

6:04 Our Lord's baptism was obviously a public event which was conducted by the Jordan River. And that is clearly taught in the Synoptics, Matthew chapter 3 and verse 13. For example, then comes Jesus from Galilee to the Jordan unto John to be baptized of him. Verse 16.

6:30 And Jesus, when he was baptized, went up straightway from the water, and, lo, the heavens were opened unto him, and he saw the Spirit of God descending as a dove and coming upon him. There is every indication that this was a public event in the waters of Jordan, one that perhaps was witnessed by many. And then, secondly, the baptisms of John and Jesus were public events. So that there could be numerical comparisons.

7:04 John 4 and verse 1. When, therefore, the Lord knew that the Pharisees had heard that Jesus was making and baptizing more disciples than John, although Jesus himself baptized not but his disciples, he left Judea and departed unto Galilee. Well, you see, the implication here is unavoidable. That these baptisms, both by John and Jesus, of their respective disciples were public events so that the Pharisees were able to make a numerical comparison.

7:40 And they discovered that Jesus' baptismal role was now getting larger than John's. Then, thirdly, the baptisms on the day of Pentecost were obviously public baptisms. There is no indication there was a shift of venue, as our British friends would say, from the public proclamation of the gospel by Peter to the multitudes gathered there in the temple area on the day of Jerusalem. There is no indication that there was any shift of venue from that public proclamation to the thousands to what we read in verse 41 of Acts 2.

8:23 Then they that received his word were baptized and there were added unto them in that day about 3,000 souls. Then the fourth incident is the baptisms at Samaria, which seem to be public baptisms. And I use my words carefully. They seem to be public baptisms.

8:47 Philip goes down to Samaria, proclaims Christ unto them, verse 6, the multitudes gave heed with one accord to the things that were spoken by Philip, and then miracles were accomplished by his men, and then we read in verses 12 to 14, but when they believed Philip, preaching good tidings concerning the kingdom of God in the name of Jesus Christ, they were baptized both men and women. And this, I believe, is our first explicit reference to the baptism of women. So when people say, well, we will argue from silence,

9:32 the Bible does not clearly state that women took the Lord's table, but we assume that they did. We don't argue from silence. We argue from the fact that women became part of the church, and therefore when the Scripture says that when you are gathered together for the supper of remembrance, obviously women were included. They were baptized, both men and women, and Simon also himself believed in being baptized.

9:59 He continued with Philip, holding signs and great miracles wrought. He was amazed. So the implication is that this was a public act of public identification. But now, when we come to the baptism of the Ethiopian eunuch, we would say that this was probably a semi-public baptism.

10:23 In Acts chapter 8 and verse 27, Philip is mandated by the Lord to go down into the desert, and he arose and went, and behold, a man of Ethiopia, a eunuch of great authority under Candace, or Candace, queen of the Ethiopians, who was over all her treasure, who had come to Jerusalem to worship. He was returning and sitting in his chariot. He was probably in the midst of an entourage who were with him. It is very unlikely, and we learn this from the secular accounts of how travel would be made in those days, very unlikely, that he would be traveling alone, particularly a man of such influence and authority,

11:06 but would have traveling companions with him. And although they are not explicitly mentioned, I believe it is right to infer that they were present. And then we read in verses 35 to 38, Philip opened his mouth, beginning from the scripture preached unto him Jesus, and they went on the way and came to a certain water, and the eunuch said, Behold, here is water, what doth hinder me to be baptized. Obviously, Philip, in preaching Jesus, did not omit the demand to be baptized.

11:38 Very interesting, because there is no other explanation for the fact that when they come to this body of water, whatever it was, that he says, Behold, here is water, what doth hinder me to be baptized. And he commanded the chariot to stand still, and this is a great embarrassment, this passage, to those who deny that immersion is the ordinary and proper mode of baptism. They both went down into the water. Now, if he was merely going to sprinkle them, they would only need to come to the water's edge, scoop up a handful and spritz it.

12:13 If he was merely going to pour, he had vessels already in his chariot. No one crosses a desert without vessels of water. He could have poured the water upon him or sprinkled him, but they get out of the chariot, they go down into the water, both Philip and the eunuch. I mean, how much more explicit can God get?

12:34 And he baptized him with both of them down into water, and when they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord caught away Philip, etc. Well, here we have an incident of what we would call a perhaps semi-public baptism, a baptism in the presence of his traveling entourage. Then when we come to this passage, then when we come to Saul of Tarsus, here is a probable private baptism, Acts chapter 9 and verse 10. Now, there was a certain disciple at Damascus named Ananias.

13:11 The Lord said unto him in the vision, Ananias, and he said, Behold, I am here, Lord. And the Lord directs him to go to a certain house. Now, that's why I say seems to be private, but remember, he was in someone else's house, the house of Judas. For one saw a man of Tarsus.

13:30 Behold, he prays. And then we read in verses 18 and 19, And straightway there fell from his eyes scales, and he received his sight, and he arose and was baptized, and he took food and was strengthened. The inference is that he took his food in the context in which he was baptized, so it may well be that the members of the household of this man, where he was found by Ananias, were present. So I use very guarded language.

14:03 The baptism of Saul of Tarsus seemed to be private, but may have been semi-private. Well, then the next incident is the baptism of Cornelius' household, and this was obviously done in the presence of Peter and the brethren who came with Peter from Joppa. Acts 10, 23b. Acts 10, 23b.

14:33 So he called them in and lodged them, that is, Peter and his entourage, and on the morrow he went forth with them and certain of the brethren from Joppa accompanying him. I'm sorry, this is the contingency that came up from Joppa or down from Joppa to Peter. And now Peter enters in with them into the household of Cornelius, and remember he is not going alone, but he has others with him, and their testimony is given in Acts 11. So when we read in verse 48 or verse 47, Can any man forbid the water that these should not be baptized who have received the Holy Spirit as well as we?

15:16 He commanded them to be baptized. And here we obviously have a situation where there was a public baptism in the presence of Peter and the brethren from Joppa and the household of Cornelius, however large it was, of those who had heard, had received the word, and upon whom the Spirit had come. Now we believe in household baptisms. Wherever you have those factors, we firmly believe in household baptisms.

15:45 When you've got whole households hearing the word and the Holy Ghost works in all who hear the word, then we'd gladly baptize whole households. And would to God that we'd see such an outpouring of the Spirit that household baptisms would be the rule rather than the exception. But remember, they are the exception in the book of Acts. That's why they're mentioned when they occur.

16:07 I'm amazed how my paedobaptist friends argue from the few household baptisms into the universal practice when the emphasis of Scripture is just the opposite. They are mentioned because they are not the ordinary. They were the extraordinary. And in each case, there is clear biblical data to demonstrate you had household baptism because you had household hearing and believing of the word of God.

16:31 All right? Then you have in the next place the baptism of Lydia and her believing household which was apparently semi-private. You see how there's no fixed pattern emerging. Acts chapter 16.

16:47 And Peter, Paul finds a place of prayer. And there he finds this woman Lydia and others. And we read in Acts 16, 14. And a certain woman named Lydia, a seller of purple of the city of Thyatira, one that worshiped God, heard us, whose heart the Lord opened to give heed to the things that were spoken by Paul.

17:12 And when she was baptized and her household, she besought us, saying, If you judge me to be faithful to the Lord, come in unto my house and abide there. And she constrained us. And here again you see the universal testimony of Scripture is that the grounds on which she was baptized were not different from the other members of her household. And though the Scripture does not explicitly describe how each of them had their hearts opened since those were prerequisite to her baptism, we have no compelling biblical reason to believe that they were not the conditions present in the other members of the household.

17:56 Then you have the baptism of the jailer and his believing household which was a corporate but more private act. Acts 16, verses 32 to 34. Acts 16, 32 to 34. And they spoke the word of the Lord unto him with all that were in his house.

18:18 The whole household is hearing the word of God. And he took them the same hour of the night and washed their stripes and was baptized, he and all his immediately, all his what? All his household, including waking up the little babies? No.

18:34 Those that were hearing the word of God at that unearthly hour. They spoke the word of the Lord unto him with all that were in his house. And he washed their stripes and was baptized, he and all his. And he brought them up into his house, set food before them, rejoiced greatly with all his house, having believed in God.

18:56 Well, this seemed to be at best a private baptism of the members of the household of the jailer along with the jailer. But then you do have verse 40. And they went out of the prison. If the baptism was done in the prison precincts, then it may not have been just a household private baptism.

19:18 It may have occurred in the presence of at least some of the other prisoners and the prison staff. So one has to be very tentative in looking over the biblical data. Then the next to the last incident, is the baptisms recorded at Corinth. And they were apparently public.

19:36 And I can say no more than that because the text is not. Acts 18.8 and Crispus, the ruler of the synagogue, believed in the Lord with all his house. You see how clear the Holy Ghost is to emphasize that there was household faith.

19:54 And many of the Corinthians hearing, believed, and were baptized. And if there were whole households that believed, whole households were baptized, as in the case of Crispus. But apparently, that was not the general rule because Jesus said, I came not to send peace, but a sword. I came to divide households.

20:16 Matthew 10.34 and following. And rather than the new covenant uniting households, it divides them. I've come to set a man against his father, the daughter against her mother, the daughter-in-law against a mother-in-law, and a man's foes shall be they of his own.

20:31 Household. All right? But thankfully, there were times when whole households came to faith, and these were apparently public. Crispus believed with all his house, and many of the Corinthians hearing, believed, and were baptized.

20:46 No indication that they were separated from the community of unbelief when they publicly declared that they had joined the community of belief or the band of disciples. And then, the last recorded incidence, Acts 19.3, the baptisms at Ephesus were apparently private, except in the presence of the others who were being baptized. It came to pass when Apollos was at Corinth, having passed through the upper country, he found certain disciples and said, did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?

21:19 And they said, nay. And he said, into what were you baptized? They said, into John's baptism. And he said, well, it really wasn't John's baptism because the content of John's message was to be baptized with the baptism of repentance pointing to the one that was coming upon whom they should believe, that is, on Jesus.

21:41 So they had not even had an accurate conveyance of the message of John. It was a truncated John the Baptist theology. And when they heard this, they were baptized into the name of the Lord Jesus. So here was a limited, semi-private baptism that was carried on or administered apparently only in the presence of the twelve men who are mentioned in verse seven.

Directives Prior to a Baptismal Service

22:11 There is no indication that this was an open, public affair. Now, in the light of these, of this data, pointing to a lack of fixed pattern as to circumstances, we come back to the words of our confession that there are some things pertaining to the worship and government of the Church in which we are dependent upon the general principles of Scripture, the light of Christian prudence. So we are at liberty to have a separate service, to baptize at the end of a service, to baptize in a public place, in a church building. I would go so far as to say to baptize in a private home.

22:54 You see, if all of these instances, and I've given you an overview of every recorded instance of baptism in the Book of Acts, plus the two major ones found in the Gospels, there is no fixed pattern. So, I would like to give some general counsel based upon the general rules of the Word of God and the application of those rules as they apply to the ordinary circumstances in which most of you will be called upon to carry out your ministries. And these guidelines fall into two categories. Number one,

23:37 directives prior to any baptismal service. And then secondly, directives for the conducting of a baptismal service. All right? First of all, directives prior to any baptismal service.

23:54 And I have basically two. Number one, explain the significance of the ordinance to those who are to be the subjects of the ordinance. Explain the significance of the ordinance to those who are to be the subjects of the ordinance. And here, I would urge you to have such people either sit in on a class in which you give a basic, simple, straightforward exposition of the biblical and theological and practical implications of Christian baptism.

24:32 You may want to give them two booklets, one or either of these or both. And then, very helpful, Jack Seaton's book, a little booklet, I think it's called, I meant to bring An Introduction to Christian Baptism. No, that's Errol Hulse's. Yeah, then the second one is Errol Hulse's Baptism and Church Membership.

24:54 But Jack Seaton's book, little booklet, is excellent. And because it is written in a, he wrote it for those who were in a context up there in the highlands of Scotland in Inverness who had very little acquaintance firsthand with what we would regard to be a biblical concept of baptism as a confessor's initiatory ordinance into the church. It is written very clearly, very succinctly, solidly biblical. So I would urge you, it's often easier for people to read something, to underline, to reflect upon it than you may want to meet privately in the early days when your ministry, the demands upon you are less pressured.

25:37 Meet privately with the person, work through that material and then, you see, they always have something they can go back to in order to review in their own minds the significance of the ordinance. So prior to any baptism, by some stated means, explain the significance of the ordinance to the subjects of the ordinance and then secondly, describe the circumstances in which the ordinance will be performed. Describe the circumstances, that is, to the candidates. Describe the circumstances to the candidates in which the ordinance will be performed.

26:19 And by that, I mean such practical things as to how they are to attire themselves. The scripture says, let not your good be evil spoken of. So modesty must be taken into consideration with reference both to men and to women and you'll want to explain that to those who are to be baptized and then what we have done through the years that has been helpful is actually to have one of our elders meet with the candidates for baptism after the morning service prior to their baptism that afternoon or evening and actually have one of the elders do a dry run of what it will mean for them to be baptized,

Directives for Conducting a Baptismal Service

27:03 the actual mechanics of getting them down into the baptismal pool and performing the act of baptism and having them exit and get clothed for their normal interaction. Just don't leave things hoping they'll turn out all right. So prior to any baptisms, explain the significance, describe the circumstances. Now, secondly, in the actual conducting, directives for the actual conducting of a baptismal service and here I have four exhortations or entreaties or guidelines to give you.

27:40 Number one, seize, and the word seize is S-E-I-Z-E, I before E, except after C or when sounded as A as in neighbor and way but either leisure, neither and seize are four exceptions if you please. Now, that little ditty was taught to me by that ninth grade student of mine when I was a freshman in high school and he said, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know or grammar teacher who pounded stuff into me and is with me to this day, I before E except E or when sounded as A as in neighbor

28:24 any I or way W-E-I-G-H but either that's not A but it's not I before E it's E-I either neither leisure and seize are four exceptions if you please. So seize the opportunity to seize the opportunity at which you can opportunity to learn how to spell seize while writing it in this place you seize, all right? Seize the opportunity to explain this visible word by the exposition of the written word. Whatever you do and however you arrange a baptismal service, by a riverside, in a backyard

29:05 pool, in someone's bathtub, seize the opportunity to explain this visible word by the exposition of the written word. Superstition and sacramentalism are in every human heart by nature, and they need to be preached out of the human heart.

29:31 Superstition and sacramentalism are in every heart by nature. We need to preach them out. Furthermore, since all the benefits of the gospel are given to believers, and only as believers continue in the way of faith, faith must have a word from God to feed upon. How can a person's baptism be an act of faith, having sealed to their hearts the benefits of faith, if faith has no word from God on which to feed?

30:10 In one of the great and wonderful legacies of the Reformation is the great truth that sacrament always stands under the word, and it radically altered Reformation church architecture, and it's a delight to go to some of those churches that still reflect that, and from a situation where you always had an exalted table as an altar, you have the table put beneath the exalted. It's an exalted pulpit, and often now you've got these steps that you've got to walk until you almost feel like you're going to need an oxygen mask, and there you stand in this exalted pulpit on the back wall of a building, and you look down 15 feet, and there is a

30:55 simple table, and the Reformation wrought that radical change in architecture, that sacrament stands under the word, to be interpreted by the word, to benefit only those who understand from the word. It's significance, so never drift into the habit of baptizing without explaining this visible word by the exposition of the written word. Secondly, at an actual service, seize the opportunity to preach the gospel to the unconverted. Seize the opportunity to preach the gospel to the unconverted.

31:37 Rarely is the line of demarcation between the saved and the unconverted. One saved more beautifully illustrated than in a baptismal service. Jesus said, he that is not with me is against me. He that gathers not with me scatters.

31:54 I've often wished we could have the situation that a missionary told me about in one of the third world countries. I think it was in an African village, and what they did when they had their baptisms is they would go down to the riverside, and if this was a village precinct, the whole village would come and gather. On one side of the little stream or river that was on the outskirts of the village, the people of God would gather on this side. All the church members, all who were identified with Christ and his visible community, and then one of the elders would step into the water, and all those who were candidates for

32:36 baptism, who had declared their faith, would step out from their fellow villagers into the water, be baptized, and then sit down with the community. Isn't that a beautiful illustration of what it is? And here where they were, stepping out from the world, visibly, sacramentally, confessionally identifying with the community of God's elect, his church, his beloved ones. Well, though we may not have the circumstances in which we're able to make it quite that patent, let us seize the opportunity by preaching to convey the gospel of Christ.

33:16 Let us seize the opportunity by preaching to convey the gospel of Christ. Let us seize the opportunity by preaching to convey the gospel to the unconverted, because never is the ultimate effect of the gospel more clearly manifested than when people are identifying themselves with Christ's visible community of confessed disciples. Thirdly, seize the opportunity to remind the people of God of their obligations and privileges in the light of their past baptism. Seize the opportunity to remind the people of Christ.

33:46 Thirdly, seize the opportunity to remind the people of God of their obligations and privileges in the light of their past baptism. To put it more simply, do on these occasions what Paul did in Romans 6, where he uses the common experience of the baptism of the Roman Christians to drive home the theology of sanctification as the inevitable accompaniment of union with Christ. Do you not know? Do you not know?

34:17 Do you not know? Do you not know? Do you not know? Do you not know?

34:18 Do you not know? Do you not know? Do you not know? Do you not know?

34:18 Do you not know? The Romans were baptized into Christ, were baptized into His death, and he argues, you see, from their common experience of spiritual and carnal, may I use the word, spiritual and carnal, spiritual and actual physical sacramental baptism, carnal is too much of a bad connotation, strike that out, but he brings the two together in underscoring both the privileges and the implications of the baptism. of their baptism, and every baptismal season is a marvelous occasion to remind the existing

34:58 community of God's people of what God said to them in their baptism, whether it was five months ago, five years ago, or five decades ago, and what they declared when they were baptized and became part of the community of God's people. Then, fourthly, I would urge you to use this opportunity to combat clericalism, just as I gave you this exhortation in conjunction with the Lord's Table, so I give it with reference to baptisms. Use the opportunity, seek to seize this opportunity to combat clericalism. And how do you do that?

35:37 Use all of the elders in the actual baptizing.

35:43 Given their peculiar gifts? Stature? And who's to be baptized?

35:50 It just may be the Lord will give you an elder sometime who's five foot one and weighs 110 pounds. And if you know you've got a couple of guys that look like they could play offensive or defensive tackle for a professional football team to be baptized, don't take your runt elder. Be sure to take the one that's capable of doing it. But use in good sense.

36:14 Use this opportunity to combat clericalism. As I said in our lecture last week, there is no exegetical basis.

36:24 As far as I'm concerned, I've yet to see anything to convince me that the sacraments are to be administered only by, quote, the ordained teaching elder, that is, the minister, let alone by just elders. I'm still waiting for the evidence to be forthcoming. I've not had any that even begins to be compelling in my judgment. So you have a marvelous opportunity.

36:48 To demonstrate that it's not any magical powers conveyed by the reverend, all right? If anything's conveyed, it's conveyed by Christ, in whom there is fullness of grace, and it's conveyed only by faith, the faith not of the administrator, but the faith of the subject.

37:10 And therefore, push the administrator as much as possible into the background. And you may be surprised how wonderful, many wonderful opportunities. This may give your people, who have visitors with them, their relatives, and they say, well, that wasn't your, quote, minister who baptized, was it? No, that wasn't our minister.

37:28 Oh, why not? Well, if you've got 10 or 15 minutes, I'll be glad to tell you. You see, seize these opportunities to try to combat clericalism, and where you men, by God's grace, will be ministering in a framework where hopefully you will establish the biblical concept of rule by elder, as opposed to congregation. Congregationalism, don't allow that biblical truth to lay a groundwork for an incipient clericalism, and seek to do all you can to neutralize it in your baptismal seasons.

38:04 Then, with regard to the particulars, you're at liberty. We've done everything from use borrowed baptistries to the, what's the little river that winds its way up through Denville in Parsippany, the, oh, Rockaway, that's it. The Rockaway. The Rockaway.

38:23 The Rockaway. The Rockaway River, and in fact, it was funny. The one baptism we had in the Rockaway River a number of years ago, the very next day in the Star Ledger, there was an announcement that that section of the river had been condemned as being polluted.

38:39 So, someone said, well, when it says arise, wash away thy sins, calling upon the name of the Lord, maybe more happened in baptism than we reckoned upon. So, we had a good laugh about that. But it was the very next day or two days later, it was within the week following our having that baptism.

39:00 So, I, that just came back to my mind this morning. But anyway, the actual physical circumstances, as we've seen from the Book of Acts, appear to be a matter of liberty and indifference. So, here you will need to have discretionary wisdom, but surely, wherever you baptize, it is right that you seize the opportunity to explain. The significance of that visible word by expounding the written word, seize the opportunity to preach the gospel to the unconverted, to remind the people of God of their obligations and privileges, and to combat clericalism in terms of who actually administers the ordinance of baptism.

Legitimacy of Involvement in Culturally Precipitated Gatherings

39:43 Now, we come, brethren, to deal with those gatherings precipitated not by Scripture, but by culture. Cultural expectations and traditions. And I have two divisions to this hour of our lecture. Number one, I want to address the legitimacy of whether or not we ought to involve ourselves in such gatherings.

40:10 And then secondly, assuming I'm going to convince you of the legitimacy, some general principles applicable to your involvement in those gatherings. First of all, then, is it legitimate for you, as an elder laboring in the wilderness, to say in the Word and in Doctrine, within the Church of Christ to involve yourself in matters not specifically warranted or mandated by the Word of God? Some would press the regulative principle to exclude a servant of Christ from participation in weddings and funerals because there is no expressed warrant in Scripture for a minister

40:54 of the gospel, a teaching, ruling elder in the Church, a minister of the gospel, a teacher, a teacher, and a minister who would not do any of those kinds of works regularly. And we know that the Holy Spirit would not do anything in concert with the word of God. elder in the church of Christ to marry people and to take part in the rituals in burying people. However, there are some general principles and precedents which, to my judgment, indicate the legitimacy of being involved in these cultural gatherings. In fact, I would even go so far as

41:28 to say that there are some precedents and principles which make it our duty to be involved in these exercises. And what are those scriptures? Well, first of all, Galatians 6 and verse 10,

41:47 written to all believers, and whatever is written to all believers is written to office-bearing believers as well. Our office never negates our generic Christian duty. Our office brings with it additional duties, but never negating the generic duties of a Christian. Galatians 6.10,

42:11 So then, as we have opportunity, let us work that which is good toward all men, and especially toward them that are of the household of faith. In terms of God's providence setting opportunities for doing good before us, we must work that which is good toward all men, and especially toward them that are of the household of faith. In terms of God's providence setting opportunities for us, we, as the people of God, and certainly as the servants of God, are to be do-gooders. Let us work that which is good, notice now the two spheres, all men, and especially to them that are of the household of faith. And therefore, the all men obviously extends beyond those who are of the household of

42:55 faith. But certainly, if ever we are to be concerned to do good, we are to be doing good. To do good with respect to the household of faith as well as to sinners. And therefore, weddings give us a marvelous opportunity to do good in underscoring the origin and the sanctity and the biblical norms for the marriage estate. Now, is that a good deed or a bad deed? Publicly to

43:27 declare the origin of marriage. Is that a god or of the devil to have an opportunity to declare the sanctity of marriage, the norms for marriage? Is that doing good? Well, if so, then you ought to lead weddings, because you can do good to all men, especially those of the household of faith. Likewise, with funerals, is it good to remind men of their mortality,

43:51 that it's appointed unto men once to die, and after this, the judgment? Is it good to obey Ecclesiastes, which says it is better to go to the house of mourning than to the house of mirth? Is it good to go to the house of mourning? Is it good to go to the house of mourning?

44:03 Yes, Scripture says it is. Well, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all men. So, I say Galatians 6.10 becomes almost a mandate to seize the opportunities dictated not by Scripture explicitly, but by cultural expectations, traditions, and opportunities.

44:23 Another key passage is 1 Corinthians chapter 9. In this chapter, we have the great principle of sanctified accommodation. And as you know, that accommodation, had two basic categories. Some of it was religious, and some of it cultural, but none of it moral.

44:45 There are certain things that are religious in nature, but not moral, as well as certain things cultural. And Paul says, picking up the thread of thought in verse 19 of 1 Corinthians 9, though I was free from all men, I brought myself under bondage to all that I might gain, the more. The very man who said in 1 Corinthians 7.23, you were bought with a price, be not the slaves of men. He says he voluntarily made himself the slave of men. I brought myself

45:19 under bondage to all that I might gain, the more. To the Jews, I became as a Jew. That involved certain things cultural, and even certain things religious. He took certain religious vows that were non-moral issues, shaved his head. To the Jew, I became as a Jew,

45:38 as a Jew. Why? That I might gain Jews. To them that are under the law, as under the law, not being myself under the law, that I might gain them that are under the law.

45:48 To them that are without law, as without law, not being without law to God, but under law, or more literally, in law to Christ, that I might gain them that are without law. To the weak, I became weak, that I might gain the weak. I am become all things to all men, that I may by all means. To save some, and I do all things for the gospel's sake. Now there's the great text

46:15 of sanctified accommodation. And I say this text certainly becomes something close to a mandate that we should adapt to cultural expectations and traditions which give us an opportunity to save some. If we are not compromising moral issues, then we are not then we are at liberty to make ourselves the servants of the expectations of others to win them for the gospel's sake. And then we have thirdly the example of our Lord. In

46:59 John chapter 2, our Lord was invited to a wedding. He responded to the invitation. And it was at that wedding that he showed forth his glory and his concern. And he showed forth his concern for men's happiness and well-being. When he turned the water into wine, he knew

47:22 it was not going to be bottled and set on the shelf and looked at and admired or stashed away in some wine gourmet cellar. It was going to add to the pleasure of those at the feast. And that's exactly what it did. And you remember the comments that were made. Most people give

47:43 the good stuff at first. And when people have had their taste buds a bit dulled by all their eating and their level of drinking, not inferring that they are drunk, but there is a dulling of the taste buds, then the lesser stuff is brought forward in lesser in quality. But he said, you've saved the good to last. Our Lord not only manifested his glory in the miracle, but he added to the joy and pleasure of those that were present by turning water into wine. Now,

48:14 when you are asked to officiate at a wedding of God's people, you, in a sense, are brought into that wedding that you might do exactly what our Lord did. You're not going to perform miracles and show forth your glory, but you want to point to the glory of Christ, whose salvation has come to this couple, whose salvation is manifested in their joyful embracing of their God-assigned roles in the marriage relationship, and it becomes a marvelous opportunity to declare the glory of Christ and his salvation, and add to the pleasure of those that are there. For that couple, if they love Christ and you're their pastor,

48:56 nothing makes them more happy than to have you present at their wedding. And the people of God are never more proud of you than when, in a setting that could be very delicate and intense, they see you conduct yourself with holy grace and Christ-like graciousness, as well as boldness, and you add to the pleasure. Now, anything wrong with that? It seems to me the Lord has set a pattern. Likewise, in John 11, he was present and ministered at

49:26 a funeral, the funeral of his friend Lazarus. Here was an opportunity for him to show his love and his concern and to do good. He showed his love and concern by being present. He showed his empathy by weeping. John 11, 36, Jesus wept, and they said, Behold, how he

49:47 loved him. He showed his glory by raising him from the dead and doing good to Lazarus and to his sisters. So may I say it very reverently, it is very Christ-like for you to accommodate yourself to ministries that are rooted not in expressed biblical mandates of the role of an elder, but into which you can move on the crest of cultural expectations and traditions.

50:21 And I say the Galatians 6 passage, the 1 Corinthians 9, and the example of our Lord are conclusive in my own judgment. I say, well, where did you ever come up with those passages in the light of that? Because, brethren, I would not partake of the pressure to involve myself in weddings and funerals till my own conscience was satisfied that it was the will of God. That's why. I didn't read this in a book. This was hammered out on my knees in my closet,

50:49 and I was prepared to say, I'll never conduct a wedding. I'll never conduct a funeral if I had to do that to be obedient to the scriptures. That's why. That's why. So I'm passing on to you the fruit of my own struggles with

51:02 seeking to have my conscience held captive to the word of God. Well, having established I trust the legitimacy of the servant of God taking the lead in gatherings precipitated by cultural expectations, now let me give you some general principles applicable to all such gatherings. And in the time that remains, I'm going to give you seven principles, or seven exhortations. And these apply to funerals. They apply to weddings. They apply, perhaps you may be ministering

General Principles for Culturally Precipitated Gatherings: Identity and Truth

51:36 in a small town, and on a civic occasion you may be asked to offer an invocation. Similar opportunities. Marrying circumstances, the situations are different. And over the years as I've wrestled with this matter, there are seven principles.

51:53 Biblical principles that I have found helpful in enabling me, I trust, to steer a course that has meant doing good, but never at the expense of compromise or the glory of God. Number one. Never relinquish your position and identity. Never relinquish your position and identity as a man of God, subject to the word of God in all things.

52:27 1 Corinthians 7.23. You were bought with a price. Be not the slaves of men. You are

52:45 Christ's free man, purchased by his own blood. He has given you your identity, and though people may invite you to officiate at a wedding or funeral as a clergyman, you are not a clergyman. You are a clergyman. You are a clergyman. You are a clergyman. You are a clergyman.

52:59 And what they have in mind is their identity of a clergyman. Their identity must never shape your own conscious identity of yourself. Never relinquish your position and identity as a man of God, subject to the word of God in all things. Now this is important because some things in a given cultural situation would utterly stifle your identity. All the

53:28 people want is to be a clergyman. All the people want is to be a clergyman. All the people want is a nice, mild-mannered reverend to do his thing so they can get on with their thing. And the way they typecast the reverends in any television plays or the rest is enough to make you want to puke. This innocuous, bland, harmless creature with his turned

53:50 collar who wouldn't hurt anything, offend anything or anybody, God or the devil, that's a horrible, horrible image. That's when I want to go back out and be a ditch digger and mix mud and throw a block around. Just in fact, when people ask me, I got a chance to, on the plains, someone saw me reading my Bible and other things, asked me if I were a minister. And I almost wanted to say, what do you mean by your question? Because just the word minister makes me want

54:25 to crawl behind the image people have. Well, never relinquish your position and identity as a man of God. Now what do I mean by that in the concrete? Let me give you a very specific illustration. Years ago, when we were constituting as a

54:41 church and the rest, we sought the services of a godless, foul-mouthed, nominal Roman Catholic, hard-drinking, lecherous lawyer in the area. God has since been pleased to save his secretary, who was, at that time, a flighty, immoral young woman. And she has since been marvelously converted and for a number of years was a member of this church, for the sins of the world. That's what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that. That's

55:08 what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that. That's what I mean by that.

55:08 Since through marriage, identified with another church, though the relationship is still a very good one with her. But anyway, be that as it may, I got a call from him some years after we had any real dealings with him, saying, Reverend, I'm going to get married. I wonder if you'd tie it or not. I said, well, so and so, I'm not sure. I said, you see, when I

55:29 conduct weddings, there are certain things that are non-negotiable. I said, why don't you and your lady friend come along and sit down in my study? I've got some questions to ask you. I've got to find out whether this union will be legitimate. I know you've had a divorce in your background, and you tell me she has.

55:46 I want to find out whether I can, with good conscience, be part of the consummating of this relationship. And furthermore, you ought to know what I'll do at your wedding so you're not embarrassed. He said, fine, Rev, I'll be by. So he called me Rev. Okay, so he comes

56:02 to my study and sits down, and I ask some pretty pointed questions. And I was satisfied that though both of them had had divorces in their background, the former partners had remarried, you can't unscramble eggs, that he'd been living with her now for two years, and it was a noble thing for him to formally, legally, biblically consummate the relationship in what we would call a proper marriage. So having been satisfied in my conscience that I was not going to be party to the consummating of an adulterous relationship, I then said, now, so and so, you've got to understand what I'm going to do. Now, I don't just go through a thing, dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of God and these many witnesses, blah, blah, blah. I said, no. I said, I have a desire

56:45 to set forth the origin of marriage, and I used the Roman Catholic terminology, caught him a little guile, I said, I'll bring a little seven to ten minute homily on the origin of marriage, the sanctity of marriage. Oh, I've got no problem with that, Rev, that'd be fine. I said, now, wait a minute. I said, then I'm going to put some vows in your mouth. And I

57:06 said, here are the vows that you're going to say. And I turned to the woman. Love, honor, obey. You're going to have a problem with that?

57:13 Well, no. I said, fine. Because I said, if you won't vow to love, honor, obey till death parts you, I said, I will have no part of the marriage. Vic, all right, let the name out. So and so, here we go. This, this, this, this. Fine, Rev, no problem. I said, all right,

57:27 now we're clear. This is what I'm going to do. This is what you expect. Absolutely. So

57:31 we had a private wedding in the old cracker box with just his immediate friends, a whole bunch of godless people. And it's to preach the gospel to those people. But I was not going to just do it without finding out whether my identity as a servant of Christ and his word would be compromised. Now, that's what I mean by never relinquish your position and identity as a man of God, subject to the word of God in all things. And I was prepared to have him come to my

58:04 study and leave mad as a hatter, having me say, sorry, I cannot do it with a good conscience and here are my reasons. I'm a man subject to this book. All right. Second principle, never compromise truth in order to get an opportunity to speak the truth. Never compromise truth in order to get an

58:28 opportunity to speak the truth. Now, in Second Corinthians four verses one and two, Paul says, having this ministry, even as we obtain mercy, we faint not. We've renounced the hidden things of shame. Not walking in craftiness, nor handling the word of God deceitfully. Not walking in craftiness.

59:00 And that craftiness, that panergia, is the thing by which the serpent tempted and beguiled Eve. Second Corinthians eleven three. Now, in this day of ecumania, we must be careful not to deny the antithesis between truth and error. If it's wrong, second John ten, to bid an ordinary person Godspeed, just to give them an ordinary common greeting of God's blessing upon them, if we know that they hold error, what must it

59:35 be to appear with them publicly as co-workers, father so-and-so and reverend so-and-so, in which the antithesis between the idolatrous whore of Rome and an evangelical minister of the gospel is utterly negated? And someone says, well, I'm going to get a chance to speak the truth. Ah, but I must speak the truth in a context of truth, not in the context of a lie. And therefore, when you're asked to participate in any community situation, you're asked to participate in a wedding, a funeral, ask yourself, am I compromising

60:16 truth in order to get an opportunity to speak truth? Shall we do evil that good may come, God forbid. And you, brethren, must have that principle deeply embedded in your spirit. Therefore, when you're asked to conduct weddings and funerals, ask questions before you say yes. Who else will participate at the funeral? Well, father so-and-so. Well, what's he going

60:47 to do? Well, I'm sorry, under those circumstances, I'm afraid I cannot. No one else will participate. You mean I will have?

60:57 Complete chart, yes. What will be the circumstances? Ask questions. If people are seeking your services, don't be their slave. You were bought with a price. And before you give yourself

61:10 out to anyone's service, make sure that your master can smile when you go. Never compromise truth in order to get an opportunity to speak truth.

61:23 What is expected of me? What do you expect me to do at this wedding, at this funeral? What would you like me to do? What would you like me to do? What would you like me to do?

61:30 What would you like me to do? What would you like me to do? What would you like me to do? What would you like me to do? What would you like me to do? Ask your questions. Thoroughly

General Principles: Avoiding Unnecessary Offense and Boorishness

61:33 investigate before you commit yourself. All right? Thirdly, don't assume that to be a man of God, you must of necessity cause offense and make enemies. Don't assume that to be a man of God, you must of necessity cause offense and make enemies. Paul would agree

62:00 that John the Baptist was a man of God. His uncompromising proclamation of truth and truth landed him in prison. And yet, wonder of wonders, he so conducted himself that we read in Mark 620, Herod feared John, knowing he was a righteous and holy man and kept him safe. And when he heard him, he was much perplexed, and yet it says he heard him gladly. Now, that's an amazing thing,

62:30 but that often will happen, that you need not compromise your identity as a man of God, and yet, still have favor with men. Romans 12 and verse 18 lays a tremendous responsibility upon us in this conjunction. If it be possible, as much as in you lieth, be at peace with all men. If it be possible, as much as in you lies, be at peace with all men. My perspective should not be,

63:07 how can I most quickly provoke men to hate? But how can I most wisely ingratiate myself to them, insinuate myself into their affections without compromising the truth? Paul said, being crafty, the very thing he denounces in one place, this is the same root word, being crafty, I caught you with guile. There's a holy guile and a holy craftiness that is exercised without compromising the truth. And so, if you're a man of God, you

63:43 will be a man of God, and you will be a man of God. And so, if you're a man of God, you will be a man of God. And so, if you're a man of God, you will be a man of God. And so, if you're a man of God, you will be a man of God.

63:44 Hebrews 12, 14, follow after peace with all men, as well as the holiness without which no man will see the Lord. Many times, sensitivity and accommodation win the ears for further contacts for the gospel. Notice our Lord's words in Luke 5, 29. Luke chapter 5 and verse 29, or I should say, our Lord's actions.

64:18 And, Levi made him, that is our Lord, a great feast in his house.

64:24 And there were a great multitude of publicans and others that were sitting at meet with them. The only way Matthew knew to show his gratitude to the Lord for his grace to him was to have a big feast and invite all of his former colleagues in the publican business and other notorious sinners. And what did Jesus do? Jesus obviously did not alienate the common people at that feast.

64:51 The only ones that got upset with him was the Pharisees looking in the window, saying, why do you eat and drink with publicans and sinners? And Jesus said, I have not come to call the righteous but sinners. He was at that feast accommodating himself to that whole situation that he might gain the ears of sinners in order to call them to repentance. And you and I must be like our Lord.

65:16 And it's amazing how some people have this kind of ecclesiastical chip on their shoulder feeling if I go into a setting at a wedding or a funeral where there's unconverted people and don't come out with every sinner gnashing his teeth, I haven't been true to God. Now that's a rotten, stinking, un-Christ-like mentality. In fact, it's a sick mentality. It's a wicked mentality.

65:37 Don't assume that to be a man of God you must of necessity cause offense and make enemies. Now you must be prepared for the truth. You must be prepared for the truth to cause offense. And you must be prepared to be hated for Christ and his gospel.

65:53 But don't assume that if you aren't hated, you've compromised. God just may be giving some modern Herod a disposition to hear you gladly. Even though you're telling him he's got no right to be beddened down with his paramour.

66:10 John was not compromising his message. But neither was he inflaming Herod unnecessarily in areas where he didn't need to. I doubt he greeted him every time and said, How are you, old lecher? How are you doing this morning?

66:23 You repented yet?

66:28 Well, that's like people standing up saying, Now I know you've come to this wedding expecting me to say, Dearly beloved, but I'm not going to say it because you're all on your way to hell. Well, a guy like that who gets hated deserves to be. But I've seen people just that ludicrous. And then they go out and say, Well, I was true to the Lord.

66:51 Well, enough caricaturing. I'm sorry. Yes, I would if it were just caricaturing. Don't assume that to be a man of God you must cause offense and make enemies.

67:02 Fourth exhortation. Don't assume that to be a man of God you must turn every culturally precipitated ministry into a full-blown evangelistic meeting. Don't assume that to be a man of God you must turn every culturally precipitated ministry into a full-blown evangelistic meeting.

67:33 Here's the idea. An overzealous man, thank God for his zeal, but it's unwise zeal, says, Well, at that funeral there's going to be a whole bunch of sinners. Maybe the only time I'll get to speak to them, if I don't give them the truth, they may never hear it again. And so they turn the funeral into a full-blown evangelistic thing.

67:53 From the opening words, there's no words of comfort, there's no sensitivity, there's no weeping in terms of an empathy. No. God's got some elective. He can save them without you being boorish.

68:07 He doesn't need your boorishness to call His elect.

68:14 Two texts of Scripture. 1 Corinthians 13.5 Love does not behave rudely, unseemly. That is, in a way that is out of harmony with the existing circumstances.

68:29 Love does not behave rudely. And then the text I quoted earlier, 2 Corinthians 12. Being crafty, I caught you with guile. And if ever there is a place for holy craftiness and sanctified guile, it is in those culturally precipitated opportunities that we have as the servants of Christ.

General Principles: Planning, Bearing, and Spiritual Power

68:57 But now directive number five.

69:00 You must give careful, detailed planning and direction to such gatherings. Now this is assuming you're...

69:09 There may be times when you're not in charge, you're simply invited. But where you are expected to be in charge, you must give careful, detailed planning and direction to such gatherings.

69:23 In any social situation, people feel uncomfortable and ill at ease if they sense uncertainty in the direction of that gathering. You see it at a reception where nobody's giving direction. Shall we or shall we not take the punch before somebody's led in prayer? Where no one's giving direction.

69:40 People feel ill at ease and uncertain.

69:44 1 Corinthians 14.40 is again our fundamental text. Let all things be done decently and in order, with proper decorum and with proper arrangement. So both with weddings and funerals, the more careful and detailed the planning and preparation, the more at ease you will be, and in turn the more at ease others will be, and the more likely...

70:11 the more likely... you will be respected, and what you have to say will be received.

70:18 So if ever careful, detailed planning is needed, it is needed at these culturally precipitated opportunities. It's not like coming before your people, where you've built up a cushion of months and years and hopefully eventually decades of goodwill. But you're coming into a situation where some may be suspicious, others hostile, others utterly unaccountable, acquainted with a man of God. You can't assume that cushion of goodwill.

70:47 So you must then with craftiness and with holy guile secure that goodwill. And careful, prayerful planning of the details of what you're going to say and do are absolutely vital in those situations.

71:09 Now then, six, you must exude your person and bearing. Second, you must exude in your person and bearing the tone and climate you wish to create at such gatherings. You must exude in your person and bearing the tone and climate you wish to create at such gatherings.

71:41 It begins with your attire.

71:44 Show up at a funeral with a bright plaid suit and a pink shirt and a paisley tie, and you have the... You have immediately put a question mark over your credibility, no matter what you say.

72:01 Because the whole climate of a funeral is somber,

72:07 and with the somber climate goes softer, somber tones of clothing, your darkest suit, your white shirt, a dark tie, a dark maroon tie. You come in your attire when you walk out of the side room. You're sending out...

72:24 You're sending out a message. I am in rapport, I am in sympathy with the climate of sobriety and grief and heaviness appropriate to a funeral.

72:39 It will mark the way you walk. You don't come out of that side room marching up like you're about to give it to people. Even your walk, and I have to consciously tell myself that as someone who walks two steps at a time, and I always have, I force myself to take little mincing, slower steps, because my walk could turn off people's ears before I ever get behind the lectern. People are that sensitive, you know.

73:10 Exude in your tone, I mean, in your person and bearing, the tone and climate you wish to create, your gait, your countenance, the tone of your voice, the look on your countenance. And this is biblical. This is not a psychological ploy.

73:26 Ecclesiastes chapter 7 makes it very, very clear. That we have a responsibility in this regard. Verse 2. It is better to go to the house of mourning than to the house of feasting.

73:42 For that's the end of all men, and the living will lay it to his heart. Sorrow is better than laughter, for by the sadness of the countenance,

73:55 the heart is made glad. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools, is in the house of mirth. You see the conjunction between heart and countenance. And if the heart is in a mourning state, then it should register upon the countenance.

74:14 Likewise, Romans 12, 15. We are to rejoice with those who rejoice. We are to weep with those who weep. Jesus did not shout with glee at the grave site of Lazarus because he knew he was going to raise him in a few minutes.

74:29 It said Jesus wept.

74:32 It would have been utterly incompetent for the Lord to have appeared on that scene and shouted for joy. Even though he knew what he was going to do. He said, Father, I know you hear me always. He knew what he was going to do.

74:46 He deliberately stayed away until Lazarus died. He'd heard the news. He's sick. But you see, he did not come with an inappropriate expression or create a climate inappropriate to the facts as they were then in place.

75:02 And we're back to 1 Corinthians 13, 5. Love does not behave rudely. It is rude in the subdued, somber climate of a funeral for a man to be telling jokes.

75:18 It may not be insensitive to thunder in your own pulpit on the Lord's Day morning, but it might be indecent to do so the very next day in a funeral parlor as though by the thundering you hope to wake the dead. And I have heard of situations most grievous. This very area where people have forever alienated others from the gospel by their refusal to get hold of this principle of exuding in your person and bearing the tone and climate you wish to create at such gatherings. At a wedding, it is a happy, a joyfully solemn occasion.

76:01 Let your cousin and show it. It won't do to stand up and say, it is so wonderful to be gathered here today to see this couple joined. It is so wonderful to be gathered here today in marriage. We all rejoice.

76:12 Say, what's wrong with this character? Let some happiness show on your face. We're delighted to be here today.

76:20 Your face, your bearing, your demeanor. Now finally,

76:26 and this is the capstone of all, you must cry to God that you may be clothed with the power of the Spirit in the discharge of these ministerial functions. You must cry to God that you will be clothed with the power of the Spirit in the discharge of these ministerial functions.

76:53 You see, since they are not directly connected with the services of the sanctuary, we may be tempted to think of them as less spiritual and more formal and professionally clerical duties. But that's a tragedy.

77:13 Some of the greatest opportunities to impress truth upon the minds of men, both saved and unsaved, come, at funerals and at weddings. Over the years, I've probably preached to more unconverted apart from special evangelistic meetings at funerals and weddings than in any other setting.

77:36 And what a marvelous opportunity then to cry to God that we may, in our capacity as the servants of Christ, though we've come into a situation on the crest of a cultural expectation or tradition, to come as men clothed with the Spirit, so that if ever we can say our speech was not with enticing words of men's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, it is at funerals and at weddings. There's a woman now, she may have been taken home to be with the Lord, I don't know. She retired up in Massachusetts, but she was converted.

78:19 And when she sat with the elders and gave her testimony, she said, the first time I was ever struck with the truth was when Pastor Martin came and preached at the funeral of a man who died, whose wife was left in the old folks' home where this woman was the head of that home. And she said, he spoke about life and death and heaven and hell with such certainty that I thought to myself, who in the world does he think he is? She was offended at the authority of the speaking. But she said, then I watched him like a hawk when he came to visit old Mrs. Blair.

78:59 And he was like, he was always kind and gentle and gracious, always left Mrs. Blair feeling uplifted. And when I saw the people from the church visiting her, finally my curiosity killed me. And I said, in spite of being offended by that kind of certainty about things, seeing what it does in their lives, I've got to go and find out.

79:21 She began to sit under the word and God wonderfully saved her in her 60s. And we all went back to a funeral where I didn't forget my identity as a man of God. Now, I didn't go in there and shout in thunder, but neither did I just lean over the pulpit and say pious platitudes. It was the certainty with which I spoke about heaven and hell and the world to come that offended her.

79:48 So there was authority, there was certainty, but there was certainly a restrained manner of presentation. Who knows? Had that certainty been joined to an inappropriate manner, we might have so offended her as never to have found her. So cry to God that you may be clothed with the power of the Spirit in the discharge of these ministerial functions.

80:15 And though I don't put it in a separate thing, I'll just tell you as a matter of experience, though we'll emphasize it more when we actually get into it, I'm actually going to give you the specifics of how to conduct a funeral and how to conduct a wedding. It becomes one of the wonderful opportunities to see whether or not you really are in the place of God. I'm in the posture of 2 Corinthians 4-5. We preach not ourselves, but Christ Jesus is Lord and ourselves your slaves for Jesus' sake.

80:44 Every time I've got to choreograph a wedding rehearsal, I say, Lord, for your sake. For your sake. And the only thing that gets me through is I think of all the ears I'll have the next day and then I manage to get through with some degree of sweetness. Otherwise, I tell my wife, I say, Honey, I'm called to be a minister of the gospel, not a choreographer.

81:06 and not a psychologist and a mediator and a peacemaker. And sometimes you can feel the tension at those rehearsals. The mother wants something and here's some guy that's not going to let his future mother-in-law boss him around. And, oh, you've just got to be nice and you're putting glue here and a little bit of Vaseline here.

81:27 And it's amazing what you have to do. But you say, for Christ's sake, for Christ's sake, for Christ's sake, for His sake. And then you're able to get through it. And then look back and hopefully have the joy that I had just a couple months ago when a woman walked up to me and she said, I've been waiting for years to meet you.

81:46 I said, well, why? She said, do you remember 11 years ago such and such a wedding in your little church? And I said, yes. She said, that day, God sent an arrow to my heart.

81:55 And from that day, she said, I had no rest until I was brought home to faith in Christ. And I marked that, if not the day of my conversion, the day of my awakening. Sitting at a wedding. Well, it took 11 years for the Lord to pull back the veil a little bit.

82:09 I believe I'm going to meet a lot more in heaven. That at weddings and funerals were brought to a state of interest, awakening in the gospel. So don't despise these, brethren. There are times when they'll be an irritant to you.

82:22 I remember one time when in the course of two years we had 22 weddings.

82:30 And most of them were in the summer months. I got to the place where I said, well, I've got to hang out my shingle and change it and call myself Reverend Justice of the Peace. It was wearisome. But again, a marvelous opportunity to do good.

82:46 And that's what we must always keep in mind. Well, let's pray. Our time is gone. I know some of you have commitments you must keep.

82:53 Father, we thank you that your word is a lamp unto our feet and a light to our pathway. We thank you that even in seeking to know our duty with regard to these culturally precipitated opportunities, we are not left in a sea of subjectivism or pragmatism. We have your word to guide us. And we pray that in these matters we may indeed prove ourselves to be men of God.

83:23 Never allowing ourselves to be pushed into someone's preconceived notion of what a reverend ought to be or do. Ever being Christ's free men and yet slaves of all that we might win some. Lord, help us in these things we pray. In Jesus' name.

83:41 Amen. Amen.