Husbands and Wives Before God #1

Anticipating the Subject: Diverse Mindsets Towards 'Husbands and Wives'

0:01 The following message was delivered at the 1992 New England Reformed Baptist Family Conference. Now I'm quite confident that if not every single one of you, the vast majority of you, are very much aware that the announced and assigned subject for this second hour each morning of the conference, as printed in the conference brochure, is husbands and wives before God. And I'm equally convinced it would be a most fascinating study were we able to inject each one of you with a clinically proven, foolproof truth serum. A truth serum that under very close and widespread clinical and laboratory examination was absolutely foolproof. Whoever had been injected with it...

1:02 told the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Then were we able to take each one of us, having injected us with this sure enough, infallibly proven truth serum, take the latest state of the art electrodes that could be attached to the human skull, and would accurately transmit, through a computer, the thoughts of the mind, and project them onto a screen. And I think it would be most interesting if we could thus inject you with the truth serum, connect the electrodes, push the right buttons, and say, now everyone, look at the screen for a readout on the mindset with which the various individuals have come to this second hour, and to the subject, husbands and wives before God. I wonder what would your contribution to the readout on the screen be. For some, I'm sure it would be one indicating eager anticipation and holy hope and desire that God the Holy Spirit, through the Word,

2:29 would both clarify to your own understanding, and move your heart, and affection to a greater commitment to be the husband, to be the wife that God desires you to be, and Christ died to make you. But alas for others, I fear that the readout would reflect the language of cynical reluctance, even to hear the subject addressed again. You've heard it addressed in the regular expository ministry of one of your pastors, through the book of Ephesians. You've heard it addressed at conferences and men's and women's retreats.

3:11 But alas, it's like the disappointed, frustrated would-be dieter who's read every book on how to lose weight, and the scale still says you're carrying around a mound of unwanted blubber. And so when some women's periodical or some television commercial announces the new sure-fire diet, you look at that announcement with cynical reluctance, even to consider that anything will work for you. I'm convinced there are probably some for whom the projection would express the language of cynical reluctance. For others, I'm sure there would be very strong language of carnal aversion to be reminded of duties which you very well know are the will of God, but which you consciously, deliberately, and continually reject in your life. I'm convinced in a group of husbands this size there are some of you husbands who flat refuse to even begin to attempt to learn what it is to love your wife with the tender, selfless, sacrificial love wherewith Christ loved the Church.

4:39 You either judge your wife to be unworthy of the effort or you judge yourself to be an impossible subject of even attempting to learn such love. And so the projection would reflect on your part a carnal aversion even to hear again the words, Husbands, love your wives even as Christ also loved them. I'm convinced there are in a group this size some wives possessed with a deeply rooted carnal aversion to hear again those words that to you are as much an irritant as a spoonful of pepper up your nose is to your olfactory nerves. Wives, be subject to your husbands in everything. And you really have a deep-seated carnal aversion to those words. And you've come to these sessions with all your defenses already raised and so no preacher is going to bully me into this submission nonsense.

5:54 For others, perhaps the projection would read out the language of troubled fear that here at this conference your peculiarly pressing, burning concern with respect to your marriage will not even be addressed and another preacher will speak as though nobody knows your particular problem. I'm convinced there are some of you wives who come with the inner language of troubled fear once again the normal and the ideal will be set forth and here I am with all of the peculiarities of my particular situation and another narrow perspective preacher is going to bypass my need. And so you sit with Christ, so you sit with troubled fear. And then alas, I'm convinced there are others who if the truth serum were working and the electrodes were picking up the signals and the screen were accurately projecting them we would see the language of sick and caustic hope that the preacher will really clobber my spouse. That's right.

7:09 And I think that laugh is a nervous laugh of acknowledgement that for some of you that's what the screen would read out. Oh Lord, whatever Pastor Martin does let him nail my husband to the pillow. Oh Lord, whatever he does let him nail my wife. But you see that's not the language of humble, prayerful, pleading with God but it's the language of a sick and caustic hope that somebody will beat up on the person by proxy that you'd like to beat up on with your words.

God's Instrument for Revealing Hearts: The Word of God

7:52 Do you think my fanciful introduction with truth serum and brain electrodes is way off base? I think not, dear people. As you have anticipated this hour what thoughts have gone through your mind? Well you see if I did have such truth serum and did I have the state of the art electronic and scientific computerized equipment I wouldn't use it.

8:26 Because that would be a carnal weapon in what is a spiritual warfare and I would have no divine warrant to use it and therefore no warrant to pray for the blessing of God upon it. But there is one who does know you all together and he possesses an instrument that can accurately reveal the thoughts and the intents of your heart. That person is the living God who is described in Psalm 119 in these words O Lord thou hast searched me and known me thou knowest my down sitting and my uprising here it is without electrodes without electrical impulses going through the complex mechanism of the computer and the microchips you understand my thought from afar. And there is an instrument that is able to lay bare the thoughts and the intents of the heart for we read in Ephesians chapter 4 the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword and piercing even to the dividing of soul and spirit

9:55 both joints and marrow and quick that is living to discern the thoughts and the intents of the heart and there is no creature that is not manifest in his sight but all things are naked and laid open before the eyes of him with whom we have to do. And you see that beautiful transition from the living active instrument the word of God the writer moves most naturally into the very person and being of God himself. And so there is one who knows us all together he has read from afar all of your thoughts in anticipation of the treatment of this subject and there is in your hands and here on this desk a book which like its author is living and active and able to lay bare to our own consciousness what is already laid bare to God's the deepest thoughts and intents of the human heart. And as we come then to this subject I have chosen to park with you for these sessions primarily on one passage of the word of God though we shall range into other passages

Reading the Text: Ephesians 5:15-33

11:22 for amplification confirmation explanation but for the most part we are going to park on that section of this living active word of the living God before whom all things are naked and open to which we have already turned this morning but just a different chapter. Please turn with me to Ephesians chapter 5. Ephesians chapter 5. And I begin the reading in verse 15 and shall read through to the end of the chapter.

11:59 Look therefore carefully how you walk not as unwise but as wise redeeming the time because the days are evil wherefore be ye not foolish but understand what the will of the Lord is and be not drunken with wine wherein is riot or excess but be filled with the spirit speaking one to another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord giving thanks always for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God even the Father subjecting yourselves one to another in the fear of Christ. Wives be in subjection unto your own husbands as unto the Lord for the husband is the head of the wife as Christ also is the head of the church being himself the head the savior of the body but as the church is subject to Christ so let the wives also be to their husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for it

13:28 that he might sanctify it having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word and present the church to himself a glorious church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that it should be holy and without blemish even so ought husbands also to love their own wives as their own bodies for he that loveth his own wife loveth himself for no man ever hated his own flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it even as Christ also the church because we are members of his body for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and the two shall become one flesh this mystery is great but I speak in regard of Christ and of the church nevertheless do ye also severally love each one his own wife even as himself and let the wife see that she fear that she reverence her husband now my purpose in the remainder of this first session this morning is very simple I want to give a general introduction

Sermon Structure and Introduction to Context

14:57 to this passage which I've already indicated will be the focal point of our study especially in the first three studies and then God willing tomorrow we will take up wives before God and then Thursday morning husbands before God and then on Friday it is my present purpose to speak on some major hindrances to implementing these directives before God and in the general introduction this morning I want you to consider with me three areas of concern first of all the immediate and remote context of this passage secondly the broader and related setting of this passage and thirdly the undergirding presuppositions of this passage and with those things firmly in place and conditioning our approach to each section in the passage I trust by the aid of the Spirit we will come much more quickly and surely to an accurate understanding of the mind of the Holy Spirit first of all then the immediate and remote context of this passage in the course of his exhortations to all of the church there at Ephesus regarding the

Immediate Context: Spirit-Filled Living and Mutual Submission

16:25 necessity of pursuing and preserving spiritual unity on the one hand and living according to chapter 4 in verse 17 a radically different lifestyle from that of the Gentiles Paul brings this exhortation to unity and holiness to a climactic expression in the opening words that I read in your hearing verses 15 through 18 look therefore carefully how ye walk he has exhorted them to walk in a way that will promote and express that unique unity established through the gospel that full-orbed gospel of the first three chapters which has landed Jew and Gentile in one assembly there at Ephesus thereby validating the unfolding of the great mystery hid for ages and generations that now God's redemptive purpose will see Jew and Gentile comprising the one new humanity and he says in the light of this maintain and practically express that unity and then in verse 17 onward he says as you then turn your face to the world make it

17:53 evident that you live a radically different lifestyle before them and now as it were in summation of that twin exhortation he says look therefore carefully how you walk these things cannot be attained by a laid back careless indifferent approach either to the maintenance and manifestation of unity within the church or to the outworking and manifestation of a radically different lifestyle before an onlooking and a hostile world they don't just happen automatically look therefore carefully how ye walk not as wise but as wise redeeming the time or buying up the opportunity we are in an emergency situation the days are evil wherefore do not be foolish but understand what the will of the Lord is let your mind be full of light but light is not enough there must be power to fulfill that direction which an enlightened mind gives to us a mind enlightened by the word through the spirit tells us what to do but it is only a heart filled with the spirit that will give us the power to do it therefore he says do not be drunken with wine wherein is excess for when too much alcohol is impinging on your brain cells you get out

19:22 of touch with reality you become a fool and I've told you don't be unwise don't be a fool a man whose brain has too much alcohol in it has lost the ability to walk and to move in a coordinated responsible way so I have told you to walk with light and understanding and a clear judgment I have told you to walk carefully therefore do not be drunk with wine but be filled with the spirit be being filled with the holy spirit the spirit who has constituted your unity in Christ the spirit who has so united you to Christ that you have put on the new and put off the old who has empowered you to live a radically different lifestyle in the face of the gentiles therefore be filled with the spirit and then he gives five participles which mark out the five conduits into which and through which a spirit filled life will flow and be manifested be filled with the spirit speaking one to another singing and making a melody giving thanks and then the fifth participle which marks out the fifth conduit of a spirit filled life verse 21 subjecting yourselves

20:51 one to another in the fear of Christ and it is that fifth participle which forms the threshold over which Paul passes into husband and wives before God that is the immediate context of the passage upon which we'll place the magnifying glass of more careful exposition exegesis amplification illustration and application but because it does constitute that threshold it's critical that we park here for a few moments and consider this immediate context we have a duty defined a motive enforced and then we have a duty enlarged we have a duty defined what is it subjecting yourselves one to another the motive enforced in the fear of Christ now this duty of subjecting ourselves one to another is set forth in other scriptures in parallel or in precise the same language as far as the use of the verb and in other cases in terms of parallel concepts first Peter 5 5 you younger be

22:20 subject unto the elder yea all of you be clothed with humility to serve one another Romans 12 10 in honor preferring one another Philippians 2 3 each esteeming other better than himself and the basic idea is that since God has constituted us a body in Christ that the unity and usefulness of that body depends on the subservience of each part to the whole and the whole to the head and that grows very naturally out of our common experience with our own bodies if I inadvertently were to have reached out this morning in the guest house where we have our little coffee pot with its warmer plate that almost gets as hot as an ordinary electric stove if I were to have reached out and touched that there would immediately have been a signal going from the nerve endings of my fingers to my brain my head from which all the directives even those that are involuntary goes out to all the parts of the body and the signal would have said this is not the best interest of your fingers to remain where they are remove yourself quickly now granted the language from the fingertips to the brain and back again would have been in

23:49 much more codified shorthand but what happened there was a signal from a part of the body to the head of the body that brought within its purview the entire cooperation of the whole body you're taking a walk through town you're crossing the street you see a car coming something registers on your brain and immediately feet and hands in all of the body obey the impulses of the head but if the impulses of the head are to be obeyed to the securing of the highest interest of any member in danger the whole body must be subject to its various parts if the signal that were to go from the head that demanded the activity of various parts of the arm suddenly said hey wait a minute let's negotiate this for a little bit by the time we negotiated five blistered fingers would be the result and so the apostle in opening up this concept of the body and the necessity of striving to maintain its unity and the body living out its new life in the power of the new humanity in Christ before an onlooking world he recognizes how critical it is that we be filled with the spirit that is so under the control

25:17 of the spirit that the native crass independence that would make us indifferent to the well being of the other members of the body be overcome by the dynamics of the holy spirit in us making it our joy to subject ourselves one to another and that's the duty defined but then a motive is enjoined and look at the motive we are to do this in the fear of Christ in taking this position Paul says your primary regard in subjecting yourselves one to another is to be the fear of Christ this is the only place you'll find this term in all of the bible you'll find the term the fear of God dozens and dozens of times the fear of God is basically that regard of God's person and presence which makes his smile the greatest blessing and his frown life's greatest fear and curse to walk in the fear of God is to walk with cap roots of filial love with a conscience at peace that God has no legal controversy with me no present paternal controversy with me

26:45 there are no unfinished accounts of daily confession and in that disposition of life's greatest dread Paul takes all of that rich biblical concept with its roots in the old testament with much of its flowering through the gospels and in the teaching of our Lord and now he transports all of it into the realm of the manifestation of God's grace and mercy and the person and work of Jesus Christ and he calls it the fear of Christ the fear not of Jesus but the fear of Christ that is the fear of Jesus of Nazareth who is uniquely God's anointed Messiah the one in whom all of the promises of that final prophet who would teach us the will of God that priest who would offer a final and complete sacrifice and by his intercession secure its efficacy for all the final and great and glorious king who will reign and must reign and shall reign till he's put every enemy beneath his feet he said let this duty and all of these duties be carried on in the fear of Christ

28:14 that is in all of these interpersonal relationships let it be the eye of Christ let it be the eye of glory as God's final prophet priest and king be stamped upon your eyeballs the fear of Christ in all the wonder of that salvation which as we heard in the previous hour has its tap roots in a sovereign selection of God that did not wait to bring Christ in some point along the way but from its very inception our election was in Christ as we may say reverently with regard to salvation Christ never existed apart from his people and his people never existed apart from him I didn't say for you theologians in terms of the ontological trinity and inter-trinitarian communion and fellowship yes I'm aware of that so don't go myth picking with me but I said in terms of the things we heard this morning Christ is never conceived of apart from his people now Paul says as I call you to this radically different lifestyle one which will demand the concentration and the alert engagement of all of your faculties looking carefully how you walk walking as a wise man

29:41 one who does not allow either the literal the literal alcohol to impinge upon your brain or the spiritual alcohol of worldliness of and spiritual carelessness don't get out of touch with reality you need all your faculties fully enlightened fully engaged fully alert be filled with the spirit and let that spirit filled life flow out in these conduits from the inner to the outer speaking singing making melody giving thanks subjecting yourselves one to another and doing so in every facet of that duty with an eye to Christ with an eye to please him with an eye to know his smile with an inner dread that you might incur his crown and surely this is one of the most indirect but powerful affirmations of the deity of Christ it would be blasphemy to transfer all of the doctrine of the fear of God which is a synonym for true religion to transfer all that to Christ not God it would be blasphemy but Paul does it with shall I say the abandonment of indifference he doesn't twitch for a moment

31:11 transferring all of the majesty and glory bound up in the fear of God and saying do this in the fear of Christ the duty defined submitting yourselves one to another a motive enforced in the fear of Christ then you see what he does it's like he looks at a petal in the flower and before long he's parked on the flower with a zoom lens and the whole flower gets painted in and having said subjecting yourselves one to another in the fear of Christ he then enlarges upon that duty not in generics but in three specific areas where God has constituted unique relationships of subordination of superior to inferior three areas wives that's why the verb participle is not even repeated it's carried over subjecting yourselves one to another in the fear of Christ wives unto your own husbands and then he goes on and speaks in chapter 6 children obey your parents verse 5 of chapter 6 servants be obedient to your masters so after giving that generic directive as the fifth conduit subjecting yourselves one to another in the fear of Christ

Remote Context: Redemption and the Folly of Evangelical Feminism

32:40 he then concentrates on three specific areas where God has ordained a relationship of subordination of one group of people to another and isn't it interesting in the day when everyone from little brats in the supermarket who are ready to kick the proprietor in the chins and say here are my rights all the way to people with PhDs the language of our day is rights rights rights the language of the Holy Ghost is duty duty duty not a word in here about anybody's rights but verse after verse after verse about the duties of wives to their husbands to their wives children to their parents parents to their children slaves to their masters masters to their slaves and why doesn't he need to talk about rights because he said it's all done in the fear of Christ and all rights are ultimately deposited in him who said all authority that is the right to act to speak all authority has been

34:08 deposited in my hands all authority has been given unto me he has the plenitude of all right and it is ours joyfully and willingly to obey in his fear now do you see why it's important not just to prove oneself correct but to help in our understanding of the word to consider as we've done first of all the more immediate context of our passage in Ephesians but there is not only an immediate context but there's a more remote context and I'll spend just a moment on this because we've already had a good introduction to it in the previous hour the remote context of Ephesians 5 is the assumption that on a given morning one of the elders or maybe they appointed someone maybe the elders none of them had a strong enough voice to fill the school of Tyranus or whoever they were meeting at the time the letter came and so they appointed a brother who had credibility of life and was endowed with a good vocal apparatus and perhaps maybe even had some training in one of the schools of rhetoric and now it had all been sanctified and the elders decided that this man would be the one who would read any apostolic letters so I don't know whether it was an elder special reader I don't have a clue and I don't know of any church historian who does so your imagination is as good

35:35 as mine or better or worse or whatever somewhere in between but on a given day someone would have stood in the assembly and said with delight we have a fresh letter from our beloved apostle the one upon whose neck we fell and wept this one we have a letter from him and so the letter would have been read as an entire unit so by the time the reader would have come to these words wives and husbands there would have been by the blessing of the spirit of God if they hadn't stayed up till one o'clock watching the Olympics the night before and were half asleep on the Lord's day and shame on you if you did it they would have sat there bug-eyed jug-eared listening to the words we heard expounded this morning blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ and there hadn't been any clever manipulators around yet to say that as he chose us meant he ratified us we chose ourselves and used our free will and God rubber-stamped it thank God whatever curses the church had at this time it hadn't had that yet so they understood it in its ordinary and plain sense he chose us in him before the foundation of the world that we should be holy

37:02 and without blemish before him and all of the glorious truth as he goes on into chapter 2 and I do not want to steal but only anticipate our brother's thunder and on into chapter 3 how this great God who chose us and who effectually called us and turned us to himself in converting grace has done an amazing thing he's brought into one new man Jew and Gentile busted down the walls that he himself had raised plus by the Holy Spirit breaks down all the walls our sins raised and now there is this new humanity that in Christ gathers at Ephesus and harps her shall I say brought to the bursting point with a sense of the one wonder of the grace and the mercy and the kindness of God in the Lord Jesus Christ now let me ask you a simple question any woman who was a wife whose heart was bursting with a sense of fresh wonder of the mercy of God and the love of Christ and the mystery of the gospel do you think she would immediately when she heard the word wives be subject to your husbands immediately sat there dug her heels and said uh oh God's become Scrooge how stupid it is how can God turn from the God of chapters one two and three of Ephesians to being Scrooge to the same people he loved in Christ

38:29 when he could have bypassed them chose them when he had no obligation to choose them sent his son to redeem them when he could have sent them to hell to be eternal monument of his wrath would any Christian woman at Ephesus in her right mind think that kind of God suddenly had a change of heart in the name Scrooge and said I'm going to nail you now lady get under your husband's thumb and do you know why there are women who in the name of Christ in the so called evangelical feminist movement believe that the obvious teaching of this passage is Scrooge like never been humbled with the sight of their sin they've never been humbled with the wonder of God's grace to sinners they've never from the death of their sin they're lost rebels against almighty God and what they need is not someone more clever than they to untwist the passage we do their error too much service to even treat it as reasonable call them what God does the ancient and the unlearned who twist the scriptures to their own destruction and we ought to call them what God does

39:56 and say my dear so called evangelical feminist be your name Scanzoni be your name Malincott be your name whatever I will not debate you I plead with you go find a secret place and ask the God of heaven to show you who you are as a sinner and to show you his grace in Christ and then you'll pick up Ephesians 5 and you'll understand it and you'll love it and you'll say the God of goodness and mercy who chose me who appointed me to sonship who quickened me gave me my role for the same very reason that he chose me and saved me it's because he loves me and desires my best and his glory and then you find no contradiction between Ephesians 1 to 3 and Ephesians chapter 5 so I tell you don't waste your time debating a so called evangelical feminist preach the gospel to her and to the wimpish on principle theologians like Dr. Roger Nicole and his ilk who will openly sign a statement endorsing evangelical feminist pronouncements that Ephesians 5 and 1 Corinthians 11

41:24 and 14 and 1 Timothy 2 we haven't really understood them God have mercy on them I'm not pronouncing them unconverted but I'm saying this much if they are converted they are in a miserable backslidden state and dear Dr. Nicole and his ilk need a baptism a fresh sight of their own heart and a fresh sight of an immolated God upon a cross and then they'll start reading their Bibles rightly Pastor Martin you're calling names you bet your boots I am when men who've earned a reputation for being responsible evangelical theologians turn away from the truth they are to be named and you're to be warned that's biblical of whom is Hymenaeus and Philetus who concerning the truth have erred saying the resurrection is past and overthrow the faith of some and I'm not ranting I've read the literature carefully and repeatedly that's why we need to consider the broader context of the passage the remote context of Ephesians 5 is the glorious redemption expounded and set forth in the opening chapters and Paul is assuming that when whoever read the epistle read it there were hearts suffused with the believing reception of all of that previous content which would wonderfully condition both their reception of and response to

Broader Setting: Organic Unity of Scripture and Equality in Christ

42:51 the teaching of Ephesians 5 well we've looked at the immediate and remote context now then much more briefly consider with me the broader and related setting of the passage we've looked at its immediate setting in Ephesians its more remote setting in the letter to the Ephesians but remember the mind of God on any given subject is not limited to one portion of the word of God and since God is one and his truth is one he is never a self contradictory God and we must therefore come to every passage of scripture with a wholly settled bias which assumes that God has sense enough not to contradict himself now you ought to have sense enough to know that since he's God you may not be able to grasp all he says when Paul wrote some things that Peter scratched his head over and said I still don't have a clue what he's saying he didn't get mad at Paul he just said our beloved brother Paul has written in his epistle some things hard to be understood but he didn't cast dispersions on Paul's inspiration on Paul's grace or on Paul's intention he laid the blame on himself they're hard to be understood the problem lies with my faculties of perception not Paul's faculties of perception or expression he didn't get mad at Paul and say why in the world didn't you say it more simply it's very irritating when you labor

44:20 as a preacher to be simple and clear and you get to the point where you say to make it any more simple and more clear is to damage and fragment the truth and then people get mad at you why didn't you make it more simple well friends if you've labored as a preacher to make it simple and clear and illustrate it and break it down there comes a point at which to make it any more simple is to damage truth in its contours and that we must never do so what am I concerned to set before you I'm concerned to remind you that there is a broader and related setting of this passage and therefore we must come to it with the disposition framed by a passage like revelation 22 18 and 19 we come with this attitude not just to the book of the revelation but to the entire volume of which it is the capstone I testify unto every man that hears the words of the prophecy of this book if any man shall add unto them God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy God shall take away his part from the tree of life and out of the holy city we come with the disposition oh God I don't want to add one syllable one diphthong one letter to what you've said oh Lord I would not take away one jot one

45:48 tittle one vowel one consonant one diphthong Lord I would embrace all you have revealed I would not add to that which you have revealed and in the light of that what is the broader and related setting of this passage let me set before you three things quickly number one the whole of this passage is organically joined to the entirety of scripture the whole of this passage Ephesians 5 and I'm speaking particularly now beginning in verse 23 where there is verse 22 where there is explicit reference to wives the whole of this passage is organically joined to the entirety of scripture now how do we know that well just look at the passage itself though Paul says all that follows will be suffused with God's final revelation in the person and work of Christ so that I without reservation do this in the fear of Christ he does not have a Christ centered religious ethos which becomes a Jesus only New Testament exclusive religion that's not the religion of the Bible

47:15 it is not biblical Christianity so in this very passage Paul bounces all the way back to where verse 31 all the way back to creation for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother cleave to his wife and the two shall become one flesh he bounces all the way from the cross to the garden of Eden husbands love as Christ loved for this cause a man shall leave and cleave why God revealed it in creation what is Paul saying by this he's saying don't you read this passage detached from its organic unity with the totality of the Bible furthermore he takes what we call natural revelation look what he said no man ever hated his own body but nourishes and cherishes it all this talk about self esteem and self love is a bunch of garbage you don't need to be taught to love yourself and esteem yourself you were taught that in your mother's womb the moment you were conceived a sinner and you and I by nature are so full of self esteem and self love that until they are crucified we'll never become Christians that's why the first requirement for discipleship is to repudiate yourself not stroke yourself and esteem yourself but deny yourself and the end for which Christ died is not that you might live in self esteem sprinkled with Christian terminology

48:43 it says he died that they who live should no longer live unto themselves Paul doesn't tell men love your bodies he says you already do it by nature now I'm telling you to take what you do by nature and do what only grace will enable you to do that is to love another with the same consistent concern with which you love yourself so he takes the biblical doctrine of natural self love and he employs it to teach the duty of a Christian husband to love his wife as Christ loved the church no man ever hated his own body but nourishes and cherishes it where did he know that that's a matter of common observation doth not nature itself teach you so within this very passage he harks all the way back to creation special revelation way back in the garden he takes natural revelation something open and available for all to see and to behold and he brings these things to bear upon the duty of husbands to love their wives and in so doing what is he saying the whole of this passage is organically joined to the entirety of scripture you say well that's a nice concept pastor but what practical implication does it have simply this the more you live in the whole of your bible men the better you will be able to

50:12 implement the specifics of Ephesians 5 the more you live in the whole of your bible the better you will be able to implement the specifics of Ephesians 5 likewise you wives the more you live in the whole of your bible the more you will be at home in this passage for you remember in a parallel passage Peter picks an incident right out of the book of Genesis when an unbelieving woman who's past the flower of her age has heard that God's going to give her a child and behind a tent flat she's giggling in unbelief. But in her giggle there's a virtue. She calls her husband Lord. And the Holy Ghost reaches down and picks out not her unbelieving giggle but picks out her virtuous address to her husband. And Peter picks out that little incident and says, You wives, you be like Sarah who obeyed Abraham calling him Lord. And the incident is that Lord. That very incident where she said, Lord, is the one I've described.

51:19 She said, So I have pleasure, my Lord, be loath also. Romans says his body was as good as dead. In a long time since they did anything but peck one another on the cheek and say, Love you. Good night.

51:35 That's right. That's what the scripture says. God resurrected their power to be intimate that they might conceive a child. And that was so unthinkable to Sarah she giggled.

51:44 But when she giggled she still called him by the right name. Now you see as you live in your Bible, women, you'll find little hints and examples. You come to the life of Abigail. Every time I read that I say, Lord, give us, give us, give us an army of Abigails.

52:00 Then we have to pray, Lord, give us an army of men worthy of them. What a woman. Living with that. A character whose name was the reflection of what he was.

52:10 How many times she must have bailed that character out, even as she did from death and destruction. Well, as you live in the Bible itself, you will find yourself more and more at home with Ephesians 5. Why? Because it is organically tied to the whole of the Bible.

52:28 So the more you live in the whole of the Bible, the more comfortable you feel in Ephesians 5.

52:34 The broader and related setting is not only to be seen, in this statement, the whole of the passage is organically joined to the entirety of Scripture, but secondly, hear me carefully on this point, the whole of this passage stands within the perspective of the essential oneness and equality of all who are in Christ. The whole of this passage stands within the perspective of the essential oneness and equality of all who are in Christ. Paul is not, contradicting one word of Ephesians 4, 1 to 7, when he comes to Ephesians 5, 22 and following. And in Ephesians 4, 1 to 7, he speaks of the one Lord, the one faith, the one baptism, the one God and Father of all who is over all and in us all. And he makes no male, female, husband, wife distinction. The truth of Galatians 3, 27 and 8, we love far more than those who use it as a retribution, as an ancient carnal sword to cut up Ephesians 5. We take Galatians 3, 27 and 28 and we love it for all God intended it to say.

53:50 If you are believers, if you are of faith, then are you Abraham's seed, heirs according to promise. And if that's your status in Christ Jesus, there is neither bond nor free. There is neither barbarian, neither Scythian, male, nor female. You are one in Christ.

54:14 And in terms of redemptive status and privilege, I say it reverently, God sees us as sexless as are the angels.

54:28 Does that shock you? I hope it doesn't, because that's what the teaching of the word is. In terms of redemptive privilege, when God is putting sinners into vital union with Christ in effectual calling, He does not check their sex and say, you come in as a man, you get certain redemptive privileges peculiar to males. Come in as a woman, you get lesser or more because you're a woman.

54:54 No, we are constituted one new humanity in Christ, absolute equality of redemptive privilege.

55:04 And the folly of the so-called feminist is that they then take this leap of perverse refusal to hear the voice of God and say, anything less than total equality of status, activity, and function then undermines our equality of acceptance in Christ. They make an equation born of the stuff of their own ignorance, arrogance, and rebellion. God feels very comfortable with saying, in my Son there's neither male nor female. And at the same time saying, I suffer not a woman to speak, but to keep silent in the churches.

55:49 And God doesn't feel the slightest twitch of contradiction when He says both things,

55:55 nor should you.

55:58 Thinking biblically, no contradiction. And we must remember that as we come to Ephesians 5, as best I know my heart before God, I not only believe that, but I've sought for 36 years to live with a woman in the light of it. In my last words before I left the home yesterday morning, where, honey, I'm going to speak on Ephesians 5, is your conscience with me? She kissed me and said, it's totally with you there.

56:29 And if I couldn't say that, I hope that I would have the manly grace and dignity enough to say, Mr. Becker,

56:38 get somebody else to speak on this subject.

56:43 If God can view His children in terms of privilege as one in Christ, all on the same glorious plane of redemptive grace, then we can, as our hearts come under the discipline of His grace, view them as He does. But that will mean the more we come under the discipline of His grace, we will feel comfortable as God does with seeing the subordination of women to men, both in the home and in the church and in certain facets in society. And we will feel no contradiction and God help us if we let God help us and if we let God help us and if we let the feminists lay on us any false guilt.

57:31 But then the third aspect of this broader and related setting that I want to touch on briefly is this, that each part of the whole is organically tied to its natural counterpart. And that's one of the beautiful things of this passage. Each part of the whole passage, and by that I mean going right down through the Servant Master section all the way through to verse 9, each part of the whole is organically united or tied to its natural counterpart. The theme is submission.

58:03 Verse 21, submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of Christ. So then he addresses wives. They are the subordinate. Wives, be in subjection to your husbands.

58:15 Chapter 6, verse 1, children. Children, they are the subordinate. Obey your parents. Verse 5, slaves are the subordinates.

58:24 Bond servants, be obedient to them that according to the flesh are your masters. But Paul could not address the subordinate without addressing the one to whom the person was subordinate. So therefore, having started with the wives, he then addresses, verse 25, the husbands. Having spoken to children, verse 4, he speaks to fathers, representative of the father and mother as the administrative head of the home.

58:56 Having spoken to servants, he cannot withhold a word to masters. You see the fairness, the even-handedness of God, if I may use that terminology. You see, it shows again how wicked it is for people to say God's mean-spirited when he says to the wives, be submissive. And to children, mind your mom and pop.

59:20 And to servants, obey your masters. How can he be mean-spirited when having addressed the one who is subordinate, he then addresses the one to whom? For whom? They are subordinate.

59:31 And very interestingly, if you count up the directives, except for the children, he ends up saying more to the one in the position of leadership than the one who is to follow.

59:42 If the number of words means anything, it doesn't always. It's neutral in many times. But just as a matter of insight, it should immediately tell us God's not showing favoritism. Nor is God indifferent.

59:56 He recognizes the peculiar struggles of the one who is called to be subordinate to another, and he justifies that he is subordinate. jealously guards any abuse of the place and the influence of the one who is in the position of authority. Now then, very quickly in my remaining five minutes, we've looked at the immediate and remote context of the passage. Secondly, the broader setting of the passage. Now the undergirding presuppositions of the passage. For you kids, presuppositions are just the things you stand on. This platform is my presupposition of preaching. I'm standing on it. Take it away, and we'd have to get adjusted a little bit after I picked myself up off the floor and riped off the dust, and then we'd be on the new presupposition, the flat floor where your pews are. Presupposition is the thing you stand on. You may not think about it, you may not look at it, but take it away and you'd know it. Well, I want you to consider the undergirding presuppositions of Ephesians 5, 22 to 33.

Undergirding Presuppositions: In Christ and No Excuses

60:57 And there are many, but I want to just focus on two. And God helping me in this brief moment, may the Holy Ghost drive these home to every heart. Number one, Paul presupposes his readers are truly in Christ. That is presupposed in this passage, that they are truly in Christ, that they are those of whom we heard in the previous hour. They have been blessed with all blessings in Christ. They have been raised with Christ. They have by grace been saved through faith. They are his workmanship. Why do I emphasize that? I emphasize it because Paul is not writing to formalists

61:43 who have the form of religion, but deny its power, not so much theoretically, but in their own lives. Let me shock some of you. Listen, there's some of you sitting here that can't do what Ephesians 5 says. Because you're not in Christ. And what you're called upon to do here assumes that you are in Christ, not a formalist. Assumes that they are not hypocrites, consciously wearing a mask, or self-deceived. But knowing and assuming they're in Christ, Paul then can assume that the dynamics of grace are at work in them. He can say, be filled with the Spirit, because they have been quickened by the Spirit to newness of life.

62:31 He assumes that Almighty God is at work in them. He assumes that the motives of grace will cut mustard with them. I tell you, this greatly disturbs me, and I've been addressing it the last three weeks with our own people. When people can sit under preaching that is suffused with the cross, and with the death of Christ, and with the work of Christ, sit under counseling that seeks to motivate them to biblical norms, with gospel and evangelical motives, and there are no changes.

63:01 Year in and year out, something is bad. The bad wrong is gospel motives don't budge them because gospel motives aren't lodged in their hearts. And you wives, if you can think of what Christ did to take a rebel woman like you, and make you his loving bond slave, and that doesn't give you a motivation to be subject to your husband, you're lost and dead in your sins. And you husbands, if you can read that your love is to reflect Christ's love to the church, and you have no heart that breaks at the thought of the love of Christ to you, it causes you to say, no matter how unlovely my wife may be in area A, B, C, D, E, all the way to X, Y, Z, and add a few more if you want, you aren't motivated to say, oh God, I want a lover that way. Has your heart ever been touched with the love of Christ? You see, Paul is assuming, presupposing his readers are in Christ. Therefore, the dynamic of the love of Christ is not the love of Christ. It is the love of

64:11 God. It is the love of God. You know, so I want to say to you that as we come to the end of this session, at this point, the words of grace are at work in them. The motives of grace will be effective to move them to action. And thirdly, he assumes there is a heart knowledge of basic Christian truth that resides in them. That's why he says, as the church is. He's not teaching them that. He assumes it resides in them. Love as Christ loved. He assumes that that truth dwells in them. And dear people, as we come to the end of this session, I want you to remember that we this passage and it doesn't cut mustard with you, then the problem is probably that you're unconverted. And I'm convinced for some people the greatest proof that they are unconverted is not that they're guilty of infidelity, not that they are guilty of gross outward sin. They sit in good, sound, reformed Baptist churches, members in good standing, but they are willing to say, I will die before I ever take Ephesians 5 as normative for my relationship to my husband. Yeah, you will die. You'll die the eternal death in hell for being an

65:19 impenitent, unconverted rebel. And there are men who say, I'll do anything but love that woman with a selfless, tender, Christ-like, considerate love. She'd walk off. That's your attitude, my friend. You'll burn in hell for it.

65:37 Paul assumed. They're in a state of grace. Therefore, the dynamics of grace are at work. The motives of grace move them and the knowledge of basic Christian truth shapes their actions. And then the second and final presupposition I want to drive home is this. Paul presupposes that the diversity and difficulty of background is no excuse to the implementation of these directives. These were pagan Gentiles. He says so. You were without Christ, without hope. You were at that time. What was Gentile

66:24 family life like in the days when Paul wrote? You talk about dysfunctional families. You know what, kids? When a mama had her baby, it didn't even have a right to the protection of Roman law until after it was placed outside on a mat. And if the father chose to give it the protection of his home, it was then considered viable. Not second trimester. After birth, Christians became known as the great unofficial adopters. They'd see a baby on the doormat and grab it and take it home and make it theirs and protect it. He talked about dysfunctional. And if we had the time, we could go into the tragic mess that Roman hedonism had brought. Look at the New Testament epistles. You had to write a circular letter to tell people fornicate ain't no good for Christians. But Paul knew that only those who had a good example of a way to be a Christian would be able to be a Christian. Paul knew that only those who had a good example of a way to be a Christian

67:25 would be able to be a Christian. Paul knew that only those who had a good example of a Christian would be able to be a Christian. Paul knew that only those who had a good example of a way to be a Christian would be able to be a Christian. And the New Testament epistles went viral and became known.

67:29 Now it's kind of confusing. Let me have you meet the New Testament epistles and the New Testament epistles. This new New Testament epistles, Dr. Paul Epistle is carrying Light of the Living God and the peace of Jesus.

67:53 I'm going to help the young About the Spirit of Jesus, Episcopal nominal Caesar. In 3 Dashua 25 we read, 3 Do not be soluble,dessels . Muti oversehted also. where there was what witchcraft remember they gathered all their books and burned them witchcraft unstructured pagan hedonistic roman family life the whole shebang there's not one shred of excuse he sets out the standard and expects them in the fullness of the holy spirit to pursue it with alacrity and there's some of you are not going to make any progress till you stop this eternal copping out because of your background because of this because of this what you're saying is your background's bigger than god your dysfunctional family is more powerful than the holy ghost that the motives gleaned from your godless father and mother are more potent than the motives that are drawn from god and from the wounds of an immolated god stop insulting my savior that's paul it better be yours it better be mine god help us then as we come tomorrow wise not because i want to get at you first but because paul get out you got at you first and he did so for good and wise

69:18 reasons may we come in dependence upon the holy spirit and know the blessing of god in the providence of god may there be a wonderful fusion as we in the previous hour will be seeing those great redemptive prayers , may the pressure of them come down upon us as we consider husbands and wives before this god let's pray our father how we thank you for your word oh how we bless you that amidst all of the din and the cacophony of the arrogant voices of men and women who try to dictate to you how marriage should be ordered we thank you you've given us a changeless eternal life. eternal infallible authoritative word oh may we by your grace. be subject to it as never before. and may we be given the fullness of the

70:19 holy spirit to implement it's directives. take your truth and seal it to our hearts and bless us this day with your grace. watch over all of the families and the afternoon activities protect the little ones from twisted ankles and skim knees and more serious life. hear the Philistine stop the Re segways yet we are against the law for your beloved and to our godly поряд.

70:36 more serious accidents, Lord, you are able to do so. Watch over us for good. Oh, may this week together be a little foretaste of the new heavens and the new earth wherein dwells righteousness. Keep us from sin on the ball field, in the places of recreation.

70:56 Lord, grant us a foretaste when sin will be forever banished. Hear our cry and receive our thanks. In Jesus' name, amen. Amen.