Listen to Parental Instruction; Pursue Wisdom

Introduction to the Series and the Doctrine of Admonition

0:02 How not to foul up the training of your children. This is cassette number 19 in a series given by Pastor Albert N. Martin in the adult Sunday school class of the Trinity Baptist Church on June 2nd, 1991. Now for any who may be visiting with us this morning, we are engaging in a study with a rather strange title, How Not to Foul Up the Training of Our Children.

0:32 And this morning is the 18th lesson in this present series of studies. Having addressed the very crucial issue of the overall spiritual and emotional climate created and maintained in our homes by the grace of God, we are now focusing our attention on the two great means given to us by God for the nurture or the development of our children. And those two means are identified, in Ephesians 6 and verse 4, in the exhortation or the command, Fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord. Now having spent a number of classes opening up the biblical doctrine of physical chastisement, or in the language of Proverbs, the sanctified use of the rod of correction, we are now examining the second, great means for the nurture of our children, namely, admonition. In our first lesson, we conducted a word study of the noun admonition, nuthesia in the Greek, and the verb to admonish, nutheteo. We considered briefly its etymology. It's a word made up of two words, one which means the mind and the other to place.

1:58 So literally, etymologically, to admonish is to put or place in mind. And there, the etymology is helpful and very much related to the use of the word, both in its noun and in its verbal form. Then we looked at the eight usages of the verb in the New Testament, allowing the Holy Spirit, who dictated, not in the sense of an executive dictating to his secretary, but in the sense of so superintendent, the very words which the apostolic and other inspired writers express the mind of God, that it is God's use of a word which determines its meaning. 1 Corinthians 2 and verse 12. So as we looked at the eight verbal usages of this word to admonish, we saw that it can be as limited as a synonym for reproving or rebuking, and as, as broad as all forms of verbal instruction, reminding, warning, exhorting, and doing so with authority. Then in our second study, using the book of Proverbs as our textbook of godly parental admonition, we took up the question,

3:22 what is the foundational issue in all godly parental admonition? And our answer was, according, to Proverbs 1 and verse 7, that the fear of Jehovah is the chief part of knowledge. And in all of the admonitory material found in the book of Proverbs, we went through looking literally at several dozen verses, seeing how the fear of God was constantly injected as the fundamental issue, and what we might call the very native air, of the, of the godly parental admonition contained in the book of Proverbs. That means that in all of our admonition of our children, we must constantly be bringing into that process of admonition, the fact of God's being and existence, the reality of his authority, the certainty of his knowledge of us and our children, and all of our and their ways, the fact that God's smile or frown is paramount in all of our relating to life, and the inevitability of God's judgment must constantly be underscored.

Major Issues in Godly Parental Admonition

4:45 And it is those strands of reality which put together constitute admonition that is of the Lord, because it is admonition which has as its foundational element, and its, its native air, the reality of the fear of God. Now today we move from this foundational issue to consider the major issues to be addressed in godly parental admonition. What are the major issues concerning which our children ought to be able to say, Mom and Dad, you're always harping on those things. Well, what are the things on which the writer to Proverbs was constantly harping with his son? Unashamedly harping. Now he had more than one string in his heart, but there are certain strings that he plucked again and again and again and again and again and again. And I'm sure his son at times when the father opened his mouth would say, look, I know what's coming out already.

5:56 Say, yes, be quiet. You need to hear it again the same way as many of you. You have heard me recount my mother's constant reiteration of the little term or the little pithy statement. Doing things you don't like to do develops character or was so many things in my early years of development.

6:15 I was required to do things when three options were set before me. The one that was most distasteful to me and when I would begin to chafe and question and try to negotiate back came the words, but son, and I'd say, yeah, I know doing things you don't like to do develops character, but aren't there more important things in developing character? And her answer was no,

6:42 no,

6:45 whatever God's given you by genetic sovereign disposition in my womb, we take no credit for that. We can neither be ashamed or proud of it, but the development of your character will determine what you do with what God has given. And do you know that this day at age? Fifty seven is hardly a week passes, but what my mother's words do not come to me doing things you don't want to do develops character and no longer do I say, yeah, I know that I lift up my heart and say, thank you Lord for the pressure of admonition in the years of my nurture and you find these various notes of admonition in the book of. Proverbs and it's been a joy though no easy task to speed read through the book of Proverbs three or four more times this week in preparation for our lesson today. And if time permits, I want us to consider together four major issues of godly parental admonition in the book of Proverbs. Now I am not saying that there are only for no, there are more than four major issues and I would not want to,

8:03 have the task of trying to say which things repeated again and again need to be called major sub major major minor minor minor minor minor minor I wouldn't want the task of trying to classify them. But if we have time, surely you will agree as we simply read the multitude of passages in which godly parental admonition is given in these areas that these are indeed major issues of godly, parental admonition. And if these things are not part of your repeated admonition to your children, then to some degree you are not nurturing them in the admonition that is of the Lord. That is that takes its lines of emphasis from the Lord's revealed truth in the holy scriptures. All right. The first and if you'll turn to the book of Proverbs, tighten your seat belts, we'll begin our study. Parents must admonish their children to be attentive listeners to godly parental instruction, guidance and warning.

Issue 1: Admonish Children to Be Attentive Listeners

9:16 Parents must admonish their children to be attentive listeners to godly parental instruction, guidance and warning. You see the realism of the book of Proverbs is such, that though there is no formal statement, full blown statement of the innate perversity of the human heart, you do have occasional statements of it. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction driveth it far from him. Whoso trusteth in his own heart is a fool.

9:54 There are those occasional statements, but undergirding the entire substance of the parental admonition, is the assumption that the child is natively stiff-necked, hard-hearted, dull of hearing, and therefore must constantly be admonished to be an attentive listener to godly parental instruction, guidance and warning. The first one comes in chapter one, verses eight and nine. Chapter one. I'm sorry.

10:34 Yes, verses eight and nine. No sooner. Does he say that the fear of the Lord is the chief part of knowledge, but what he addresses his son directly with these words, my son, hear the instruction of thy father and forsake not the law of thy mother, for they shall be a chaplet of grace unto thy head and chains about thy neck. Before he descends into any particular, aspects of admonition, the first admonition is my son.

11:10 Listen to me, my son, listen to your mother. The assumption being that both were admonishing, that both were admonishing by the same standard and rule, and both were admonishing with the same authority. And so he says, my son, hear the instruction of thy father and forsake, not the law of thy mother. He does not assume that because he's a father and he's speaking to his son, and because the mother is a mother and speaks to the son, there will be an automatic process of hearing.

11:46 Therefore, there is an admonition to cultivate a disposition of being an attentive listener. Chapter three, verses one and two. My son, forget not my law, but let thy heart keep my command. For length of days and years of life and peace will they add unto thee.

12:12 Before he branches into a new area of admonition, he admonishes, don't forget my law. Let your heart keep, cherish up as a precious treasure, my commandments. And then he adds a wonderful incentive by way of a promise of grace. Chapter four and verse one.

12:33 Hear, my sons, the instruction of a father and attend to no understanding. Why? For I give you good doctrine, forsake ye not my law. And then he gives the example of how his father had dealt with him and how, at least at this stage, he was, but echoing the pattern of the admonition of his own father.

13:03 I was a son, to my father, tender and only beloved in the sight of my mother. And he taught me and said unto me, you see, I'm talking the same note, my own father and mother plucked. They exhorted me to be attentive. Let thy heart retain my words, keep my commandments and live.

13:25 Verses 20 and 21 of the same chapter. My son, attend to my words, incline thine ear, to my sayings. Let them not depart from your eyes. Keep them in the midst of your heart, for they are life unto those that find them in health to all their flesh.

13:45 You see, he doesn't assume that because he said it once, that was enough. He says it once. He says it twice. He says it three times.

13:54 And in between four, one in 20 and 21, he said it again. Verses 10 to 13. Hear all my son, and receive my sayings. And the years of thy life shall be many.

14:10 Verse 13. Take fast hold of instruction. Let her not go. Keep her, for she is thy life.

14:19 What is he doing? He's admonishing again and again that his son would be an attentive listener to godly parental instruction, guidance and warning. Is that all? No.

14:34 Chapter 5, verses 1 and 7. My son, attend unto my wisdom. Incline thine ear to my understanding. I know more than you do.

14:47 Listen to me. You need what I'm going to tell you. He doesn't say, now my son, nobody knows anything for sure. Let's sit down and see if we can figure out life.

14:56 Nonsense. This idea of inductively coming to moral standards and to answering, answering the great issues of life is sheer nonsense in the light of the word of God. It's pooling parental and child ignorance. That's all it's doing.

15:13 He says, my son, attend to my wisdom. I know more than you do. I've been taught of God. Incline your ear to my understanding.

15:22 You see the element of authority? And he's pleading that the son would have an attentive and a listening ear. Verse 7. In chapter now, therefore, my sons harken unto me and depart not from the words of my mouth.

15:42 Chapter six, verses 20 to 23. My son, keep the commandment of my father and forsake not the law of thy mother. Well, you already said that. Yeah, I know.

15:55 But he's saying it again. Yeah, I know that. Keep the commandment. I father was saying not the law of my mother.

16:01 So that's right. And you're going to keep hearing it from me because it's so crucial that you cultivate an attentive ear to Godly parental instruction, guidance and warning. Bind them continually upon my heart. Tie them about my neck.

16:19 When the walk is that she'll leave the window sleep is that she'll watch over the and when you awake, it shall talk with you for the commandment is a lamp and the law is light. Chapter seven, verses one to three. My son, keep my words. Lay up my commandments with the again.

16:40 You see no specific one given yet. He's about to launch into a new or repeated subject. But before he does, he admonishes his son to have a teachable in an open ear. Keep my commandments and live in my law is the apple of thine eye.

16:58 Bind them upon thy fingers. Write them upon the tablet. Of thy heart. And then over to chapter 22, as you know, there's a radical break at the end of chapter nine where you have basically instruction to the young in paragraph form.

17:14 Then you move primarily into the individual proverbs of Solomon starting in chapter 10 in verse one, the proverbs of Solomon, and then they go on for chapter after chapter. But then when we come to chapter 22, lest we think, well, we've moved away from that. That's behind us. Notice verses 17 to 21 incline by near and hear the words of the wives apply thy heart onto my knowledge for it is a pleasant thing if thou keep them within the if they be established together upon thy lips that thy trust may be in Jehovah.

17:54 I have made them known unto be this day even to the have not I written unto the excellent things of counsels. And. Knowledge to make the know the certainty of the words of truth that thou mayest carry back words of truth to them that send the here he is admonishing again that there be the inclined ear that there be the application of the heart to the instructions and admonitions of the father. Chapter 23 and verse 22.

18:28 Hearken unto thy father. That. The. And despise not thy mother when she is old and in the context despising the mother is equated with being indifferent to her admonitions and instructions by which she sought to mold you.

Parental Requirements for Effective Admonition (Attentive Listening)

18:49 Now, parents, are you convinced as we've looked at these one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven texts. Is the admonition of the father to his son to be an attentive listener to godly parental instruction, guidance and warning. Now if we are to follow this pattern, what will it require of us as parents? Well, number one, it will require of us a proper conception of our God given identity and role as parents.

19:31 It will require of. Us a proper sense of our God given identity and role as parents who in the world are we to tell other people how they ought to think and act and reflect upon the full spectrum of life's experience. I'll tell you who we are. We are God's vice regent placed in our home by divine design and authority to articulate his view of the totality of life.

20:03 That's why God says to children, children obey your parents in the Lord. Why should we obey them? Because God has put them over us and designated authority to them. Not absolute authority.

20:19 They must never be obeyed. If they command us to do anything contrary to the law and revealed will of God never. And that's part of our teaching of our children. The limits of our parental authority.

20:33 But with that exception we are placed there to be God's instrument authoritatively to convey the knowledge of God's ways for the totality of life. That's who you are. And if you're nervous or uncertain about your identity, you're not going to fulfill your function of admonishing your children in the Lord admonishing them. You're going to need to your words, but not only will it require of you a proper conception of your role and identity as a parent, but secondly, an ongoing and thorough preparation by an increasing acquaintance with the word of God. How are you going to say to your kids? Here are the words of your father. Listen to the law of your mother.

21:28 If you aren't confident that that word in that law is an accurate expression of the mind of God is revealed in the scriptures. For example, yesterday sitting at my study about to get down to work again on this material. I had a call from one of our parents who just that week had had a very encouraging, but in some ways critical session of interaction with one of his children. And what a thrill it was to me to see how that father was bringing a broad spectrum of biblical principles and text and illustrating it.

22:03 By biblical incidents upon a very burning issue in the life of his son. We would say, oh, well, not that big a deal. But right now for that son, the deal is so big that his own sense of assurance of salvation is hindering on how he handles this mini crisis in his life. And what it encouraged me.

22:24 It was for me to hear how this father armed with the word of God was able to say, hear my son treasure. My words, heed my words. And in so doing, he was bringing the word of God to bear. And the only reason I got included is that at one point, the son and the dad hit an impasse in seeking to bring biblical precedence to resolve the area of the problem.

22:51 And the son said to the father, well, dad, doesn't the Bible say in the multitude of counselors, their safety, maybe we better call Pastor Martin and talk with him about the issue. What a rewarding thing. As a parent, when your admonition is coming back from your own children. So the dad said, well, I can't gain say that.

23:13 So they were on the phone and God willing, I have the privilege of meeting with the son and his dad after church today in order to seek to discuss the thing face to face. Now, that's what we're talking about. Now, you see why it's not enough that your elders have the word of Christ. Well, in the rich and our Sunday school teachers, but every parent must have.

23:35 The word of Christ dwelling in us richly, so that when we teach and admonish our children, it is indeed the law of the Lord that we are setting before them. And then thirdly, if we are to admonish our children to be attentive listeners to Godly parental instruction, guidance and warning, we must not only have a proper conception of our role as parents, a thorough ongoing preparation by increasing acquaintance with the word of God, but a resolute, determination to give the needed instruction, guidance and warning, a resolute determination to give the instruction, guidance and warning took a lot of time for the father to say all these things to his son. He couldn't be spending all his quotes, spare time being the silent presence in the home are out digging around the shops, keeping up the house, fixing the leaky faucets. Yes, he must do those things. But here was a hands-on father, not a mute macho pile of male flesh.

24:43 That was just a symbol of authority. What a cursed home is the home with a mute father. The only time he opens his mouth is to bark an order or to complain, but he's not a hands-on dad admonishing his children admonishing them to be attentive listeners to Godly, parental instruction, guidance and warning. But you say Pastor Martin is not my temperament.

25:11 Who cares about your temperament? I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I remember the father who came to me saying, look by nature temperament and upbringing. I'm not much of a communicator, but I've got a son or daughter of marriageable age and I've invested X number of years in his or her life.

25:29 And if I got to learn to talk in the way I never did before, I'm ready to pastor. Can you help me? What do you say to a marriageable age son or daughter? When they begin to get stars and moonbeams in their eyeballs and wedding bells in their ears.

25:42 What do you say? And so we talked about what's a dad say? It's not a matter of your temperament. It's a matter of your duty.

25:50 Well, it's not in my background. Who cares about your background? Is it the word of God? You claim to be indwelt by the Holy Spirit.

25:57 You claim to be United to Christ. Well, stop this copping out. It's an insult to the grace of God and to the power of Christ into the sufficiency of God's grace. And it's an insult to God.

26:10 You need to stop it and say by the grace of God. I can become a father like Solomon was all right. Second area second major issue of parental admonition. Remembering now the foundation and all of it is the fear of God.

Issue 2: Admonish Children to Actively Pursue Knowledge and Wisdom

26:28 And now we're looking at some of the major issues addressed by way of admonition. The first is we must seek to admonish our children to cultivate. The disposition of being attentive listeners to parental instruction guidance and counsel. Secondly parents must admonish their children to be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom.

26:54 Parents must admonish their children to be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom. Now again, we'll look at about 15 texts chapter 2 verses 1 to 5 and see how this. Note is a dominant note. My son if thou wilt receive my words and lay up my commandments with these.

27:20 So is to incline thine ear to wisdom apply thy heart to understanding. Well, you would think well at that point he could be passive. No, he's exhorting to an active pursuit of these things. If thou cry after discernment lift up by voice for understanding.

27:40 If thou seek her as silver search for her as for hid treasure. Then shalt thou understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. What is the father doing? He's admonishing his son to be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom.

27:59 He doesn't give any notion. The true knowledge and wisdom is something that floats by in the native air. And all he needs to do is breathe and stay alive and somehow he'll imbibe it. He says no.

28:10 It's like treasure hidden in the veins of silver and gold in the hard rock or in the bowels of the earth. And he says you must seek it as for silver search for it as for hidden treasure. Think of that image right down to our present day man. Who've given decades to find some old sunken galleon down in the Bermuda Triangle to get in the hold and find the gold.

28:36 And I didn't mean to make that rhyme. It just came out that way. But think what it means to hunt for treasures. And now my son knowledge and understanding are so precious.

28:46 You must never be passive or indifferent to the attainment of them. You must be active energetically active in the pursuit of these things. Chapter 3 verses 13 to 18. Happy is the man that find it wisdom and the man that get it understanding for the gaining of it is better.

29:09 Than the gaining of silver and the profit thereof than fine gold. She's more precious than rubies. None of the things you can desire are to be compared under. You see he's giving to his son a scale of values.

29:26 He says now when you think of what's precious in life. A nice savings account some gold stashed away some precious jewels. He said look they are nothing compared to a treasure. Of understanding and of wisdom.

29:42 Blessed is the man that finds wisdom. The man that gets understanding. And then he goes on to describe what she brings with her. And what she imparts in order to create this incentive in his son.

29:59 To be active in the pursuit of knowledge and of wisdom. Chapter 4 verses 5 to 9. Get wisdom. Get understanding.

30:10 Forget not neither decline from the words of my mouth. Forsake her not and she will preserve thee. Love her and she will keep thee. Wisdom is the principle thing.

30:23 Not learning a trade and earning a buck. Not the principle thing. Getting a husband and having kids. That's not the principle thing.

30:38 What is the principle thing? The principle thing. Is the attainment of wisdom and understanding. Exalt her and she will promote thee.

30:50 She will bring thee to honor. When thou dost embrace her. You see here is the picture of someone going after wisdom and understanding. Like a man pursuing one who's become the object of his affections.

31:06 Chapter 9. I'm sorry chapter 6 in verse. I slipped down to number 3. Chapter 8 verses 1 to 5.

31:12 Got to keep my eyes where they belong here. In the right part of my bifocals. All right. Chapter 8 verses 1 to 5.

31:21 Doth not wisdom cry and understanding put forth her voice? On the top of the high places by the way where the paths meet. She stands beside the gates at the entry of the city at the coming into the door. She cries aloud unto you all men I call.

31:38 And my voice is to the sons of men. Oh ye simple understand prudence. And ye fools be of an understanding heart. In other words place a great premium on the attainment of true understanding and of prudence.

32:00 And then wisdom goes on to speak in the first person. But the point that we see in these opening verses. Is that there is to be this. Pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom.

32:15 Verse 11 wisdom is better than rubies and all the things that you. That may be desired or not to be compared unto it. As you talk with your son or daughter. What do you want to be in life?

32:26 What do you want to attain? And whatever legitimate things there may be. Tell them pile them all up. And there is something of greater worth.

32:34 And all the things that may be desired or not to be compared unto it. True wisdom. True knowledge. It is to be actively sought.

32:46 Verses 32 to 36. This whole chapter closes. Now therefore my sons. Hearken unto me.

32:53 For blessed are they that keep my ways. Hear instruction and be wise and refuse it not. Blessed is the man that hears me. Watching daily at my gates.

33:04 Waiting at the post of my doors. For whoso finds me. Finds life and shall obtain favor of Jehovah. That's wisdom speaking.

33:13 Saying whatever else you do or do not discover in life. Discover me. Become acquainted with me. I am to be sought above all else.

33:24 Chapter 9 verses 10 and 11. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. For by me thy days shall be multiplied in the years.

33:37 The years of thy life shall be increased. If thou art wise. Thou art wise for thyself. And if thou scoffest.

33:47 Thou alone shall bear it. Here again. There is to be that true wisdom. The foundation of which is the fear of God.

33:56 And there is to be that true knowledge. The acme of which is knowledge of God himself. Chapter 10 in verse 14. Wise men lay up money in the bank.

34:09 Not necessarily. The book of Proverbs speaks of a man who walks in his integrity and yet lives in poverty. Poverty is sometimes the very price a man pays for integrity. Wise men do not necessarily lay up money.

34:27 Some wise men don't have money to lay up. And they don't have it because of folly and foolishness and self-indulgence. And they have it not have it for righteous reasons. But wise men in every case do treasure up knowledge.

34:42 But the mouth of the foolish is a present destruction. Chapter 11 verse 2. When pride cometh, then cometh shame. For why should we abominate pride?

34:54 Why should we abominate having strut as young men and women or older men and women? Because there will be no true wisdom in a proud heart. When pride cometh, then cometh shame. But with the lowly is wisdom.

35:08 True wisdom. True wisdom requires the moral, ethical quality of humility of heart. Now getting 10 PHD degrees doesn't require an ounce of humility. You can be proud as a dozen peacocks.

35:26 But for a man to obtain a gram of true wisdom, it will only be in a humble heart. And so he is exhorting to humility. Why? Because in humility alone will the way of wisdom be known.

35:40 And experienced. Verse 9. With his mouth the godless man destroys his neighbor. But through knowledge shall the righteous be delivered.

35:51 Here knowledge is essential to deliverance whatever that deliverance may be. Chapter 12 in verse 8. A man shall be commended according to his wisdom. What a horrible thing when men are commended according to their good looks.

36:07 Or their station in life. Or their super personalities. Or any other commodity. Solomon says a man shall be commended according to his wisdom.

36:18 But he that is of a perverse heart shall be despised. He ought to be despised. God help us when he is exalted to a place of prominence. Chapter 14 verses 6 to 8.

36:31 A scoffer seeks wisdom and finds it not. But knowledge is easy unto him that hath understanding. Go into the presence of a foolish man and you shall not perceive in him the lips of knowledge. You see he is making the absence of true knowledge and understanding something odious.

36:50 Something to be avoided. You see by positive injunction. Likening it to precious commodities of silver and gold and rubies. A precious companion and friend.

37:01 A desired lover. Now he is using negative examples. The absence of it will make you an odious person. One that any who have true discretion will deliberately and wisely avoid.

37:15 Chapter 15 and verse 14. The heart of him that hath understanding seeketh knowledge. But the mouth of fools feeds on folly. Here again.

37:29 The constant emphasis upon the active seeking of knowledge. Chapter 18 and verse 15. The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge. And the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge.

37:45 You see here is the person who when he comes into any situation is not ready to bless everyone with his great pearls of infinite wisdom. He is ready to listen and to learn. Swift to hear. Slow to speak.

38:00 And if he speaks he is asking questions that he might attain more knowledge and more wisdom. More knowledge and more understanding. Chapter 19 and verse 2. Also that the soul be without knowledge is not good.

38:15 And he that hasteth with his feet sinneth. Looking at the structure of that text it indicates a man who runs off half cocked to do something. And isn't held in by the guidelines of a broad accurate spiritual understanding. He is going to sin.

38:33 Understanding. Understanding in the biblical sense is the divine antidote to folly and unwise decisions that one will have to look back upon as fuel for repentance. Chapter 23 verses 15 and 19. My son if thy heart be wise.

38:58 My heart will be glad even mine. Yea my heart will rejoice. When my lips speak. My pen will be light.

39:07 My fingers will be whole. Your hands will be knit. Thy hand will be in my bosom. My hands will be in my side.

39:11 Yea thy heart will be in my hand, and thy lips will be in mine. He is comin ing with his own word. He will be looking at life and human relationships through the eyes of God. And I said to that father if you were sitting there today with nothing but a rag on your back and a towel for a rug under your feet, I said you're a wealthy man to have that kind of wisdom coming out of your son.

39:33 And he said pastor I know it and I thank God for it. And he said I know it and I thank God for it. for it this is exactly what Solomon was talking about and then chapter 24 verses 3 to 5 through wisdom is a house builded and by understanding it's established and by knowledge are the chambers filled with all precious and pleasant riches a wise man is strong yea a man of knowledge increases might for by wise guidance and then he goes on to speak of getting knowledge from others but that's another heading but you see what he's saying no emphasis here upon material possessions in one standing in the eyes of the world or in any other standard of success set by the world but a house built by divine wisdom and understanding constructed in all its relationships and its perspectives and goals you by the understanding and wisdom embedded in the word of God, such a house is filled with precious and pleasant riches. Well, are you convinced from this brief survey, and this is not exhaustive, I've tried to pick out the most dominant passages and get a smattering from beginning to end of the book of Proverbs, that if we as parents are to take the book of Proverbs

40:59 as the unique deposit in the book of God as to what it is to admonish our children in the Lord, then surely we must not only admonish them to be teachable and to receive instruction and counsel, but we must constantly admonish our children to be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom. Now then, the question arises, if we're going to do that, what does that require of us?

Parental Requirements for Effective Admonition (Pursuit of Wisdom)

41:28 Well, the first thing, it requires of us, you tell me, you've been listening, I want to involve you. I wish I could take the material and do it all, give and take, but we'd be going on long beyond what would be proper in the course of this series of studies. But you tell me, what's the first prerequisite if you're going to be a parent who nurtures his children in the admonition of the Lord, i.e., admonition that your children be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom? What's the first prerequisite? What do you think? We must be examples of that ourselves.

42:10 We must set an example of what it is to be men and women constantly seeking true knowledge and wisdom by all of the means through which those commodities are acquired by us. And again, we can't go into what all those means are, but if we are not ourselves examples of those, with active, inquiring, broad interests, if we are perceived by our children as being content that we know just enough in this area and that area to get by, and that we are not constantly striving to increase our own understanding of God and of His ways and of His world, of His creatures, of His blessings, of the dangers of this life, the full spectrum of what is involved, the full spectrum of what is involved, the full spectrum of what is involved, the full spectrum of what is involved, in living in God's world in this present age in which sin is at work and yet in which common grace is operative and special grace is operative, if we are not the models of the sanctified, inquiring mind, don't expect your children to follow where you've not gone. You say, well, what's the big deal about that? May I remind you? What's the first commandment?

43:32 Thou shalt love the Lord thy God Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy mind, with all thy mind, and with all thy strength.

43:47 Someone asked me the other day and said, Pastor, wouldn't you say that the spiritual development of our children is more important than their physical or intellectual development? I said, no.

44:01 It would be unbiblical. I will not place one category of the child's development as more important than another. God says, Love him with all the heart, the mind, the soul, and the strength with the whole of your being.

44:17 Now, I would say at a given point in a child's development, you may need to concentrate on one aspect more than another. For example, suppose a child had rheumatic fever and was greatly weakened. The doctor said this given course of therapy is absolutely essential after the rheumatic fever is over. If this child is to regain a modicum, a modicum of strength and live a normal life, well, for a period of a year, you might give an unusual amount of attention to the physical culture of that child more than you would be giving in actual time to his intellectual or spiritual culture.

44:56 But you're not doing it because the physical is more important. You're doing it because the physical needs more attention at that point. You see the difference?

45:04 You see the difference, yes or no? That's all the difference in the world. Jesus grew, it doesn't say, first of all, first of all, in wisdom, second, in stature, third, no, no, he grew concurrently in all those aspects of his holy humanity. All of them.

45:21 He grew concurrently in all of them. And so must our children and our admonition, if it is indeed to be one that they be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom, we ourselves, regardless of our station in life, must be those who epitomize and actively, pursuing mind. We ourselves must be readers, observers, questioners, learners, people who in our interaction with others are constantly desirous to learn what we can of life from their perspective, life lived under their skin and behind their eyeballs. We must not have a smug kind of provincial and mental and psychological provincialism in which we're, in, to our own little world. And we're content if our children grow up shut in that little world as well. We're robbing them of appreciation of all that God has deposited in his world. We're giving them a narrow perspective and many, many horrible results will come.

46:31 They'll be unable to appreciate people of different cultures and backgrounds and perspectives. They'll be unable to relate to people who are different. It's unlikely that we'll have much of a real missionary passion in the world. I'm concerned if your whole world is North Jersey and how to make it and nothing more.

46:50 You see, it has all kinds of implications. We ourselves must set the pattern. And then what do you think a second great requirement is in us in parents? If we're going to admonish our children to be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom, we ourselves must set the pattern, inquiring minds, observant faculties, constantly questioning, what else must we do?

Providing Tools and Resisting Negative Influences

47:14 Someone, venture suggestion because we're only going to get this far this morning and so I'm not pushing for another yes Michael all right find ways of applying it to our children this is what I've put we must take calculated efforts to speak and to provide tools for the acquisition of wisdom and understanding we must make calculated efforts to speak in such a way and to provide tools for the acquisition of wisdom and understanding that means we will be more concerned to provide good books for our kids than designer jeans and sneakers how's that for being blunt and practical well that all the kids have to a dash but the difference between George ash and something else just is serviceable would buy a book and buy a book and buy a book and buy a book and buy a book and buy a book it's like two books you sit down with your child and say hey look these ain't your dash but they cover your bottom very nicely and modestly in your legs but now look what we've been able to do with the difference we've been able to get this hunk of rubies and gold and silver in the back yes and you take out a book that's going to increase their knowledge and wisdom you take into Solomon where

48:39 he says this is more to be desired and gold and silver and designer jeans about Frankly, I'm disturbed at the way some of you are encouraging your kids to be fashion hounds. Are they going to be willing to live on a subsistence salary and go to a different culture and dress modestly, not have the latest thing? You don't create missionaries by all of a sudden. Kid gets to be 22 and he says, oh, I've got a burden.

49:06 There is a whole complex of mental and psychological, sociological and economic values that will either tie them to this present circle of things oriented society or let them hold loosely to it for Christ's sake in the gospel.

49:27 So we've got to provide the tools. Then there's a third thing we've got to do. I don't know if anybody's bold enough to suggest it. If you don't, I'll say it because it's in the notes.

49:37 What's the third thing? The third thing you must do if you're going to admonish your children to be active in the pursuit of knowledge and wisdom and have your admonition become at all effective.

49:49 And the idea has got to be an example. Got to provide the tools. This is a negative one. You must actively resist the dominating influences which would negate their pursuit of wisdom and understanding.

50:09 You must actively resist. It's a lot of you don't like to do. You're intimidated by your kids. You don't want to actively resist it, especially when they get up into their teens.

50:23 Actively resist the influences that would negate their pursuit of wisdom and understanding. And what are the two dominant influences that you better negate in their lives? Come on, tell me. What are they?

50:37 Oh, that's in their hearts. These are things you can resist. You can resist. You can't reach in their heart and cut off their strut at the knees, can you?

50:46 Wish we could. Wish we could reach into our own. But what can we do, Jerry? Huh?

50:52 Say it again. Yeah. Indiscriminate, ungoverned television watching. There is no factor that will more quickly and effectively neutralize wholesome mental and spiritual and psychological thirst for wisdom and understanding than sitting there absorbing the images that pummel kids from a TV.

51:17 And some. Some of you have a lot of work to do in this area. You don't have a clue of how you are, as it were, cauterizing the very nerves that would impel the minds of your children to wholesome activity by allowing them to sit passing, watching images and sounds go by them on the television screen. Now, am I giving wholesale condemnation to television?

51:42 No. Certain television programs you ought to make your kids watch and watch with them and discuss them. They can be a great instrument. They can be a great instrument of learning and the acquisition of understanding.

51:54 So I'm not making a blanket condemnation of television, but I'm saying if your house is anything like the pattern of the American, average American household where the average child is watching five hours of TV a day, all your admonitions that they acquire wisdom and knowledge will come to naught. Then what's the second great influence that will neutralize it effectively?

52:16 Ah, that's it. Say it out loud, Bruce.

52:20 That's right. You control, insofar as it's humanly possible, the kind of music they listen to.

52:28 Again, I don't think the average parent in this place has really come to grips with how utterly destructive of the whole of humanity is the modern music.

52:40 I have made myself in recent days as a matter of principle listening to a few of the current in-hit rap videos. What a bummer. Horrible, lawless, filthy, vile, rebellious, demonic joke. That stuff is.

53:04 And to think that that moralist alley cat woman who names herself Madonna is the idol of a whole generation. It's insulting an alley cat to say that she has the morals of an alley cat. An alley cat is only active certain times when it's in heat. She's a filthy woman.

53:26 She's a filthy woman who acts like an animal in perpetual heat.

53:32 And you better make sure when your kids are at the neighbor's house, they're not watching MTV with that filthy slut influencing your sons and your daughters. Oh, my kids wouldn't. Oh, if they wouldn't, what makes you think they wouldn't? How do you know they aren't?

53:53 God have mercy on you parents. If you are not committed by the grace of God. Actively. To resist the influences that would negate their pursuit of wisdom and understanding.

54:07 And the two most dominant such influences are the TV and the music they listen to. It's one of the reasons your elders on our coming retreat, if we have the time to do it, if we don't there, it has a high priority, a wrestling with this whole question. What can we and what ought we and what may we do to help cultivate in the life of our congregation? A true appreciation.

54:31 A true appreciation of the beauty and nobility of music that is one of the things that will carry with us into heaven. And how do we learn the standards of the music of heaven and bring them down to earth now? There's a lot of music now that I know if there's any music in hell, what it'll sound like.

54:50 Rising, compelling, lawless.

54:56 It's the music of hell. And all the sophistry to justify it and all the rest won't wash. By their fruit you'll know them. By their fruit you'll know them.

55:08 And when that junk is brought into the so-called church and gospel rock and all the rest, by their fruit you'll know them. The so-called Christians that go to Christian rock concerts, are they the kind that are weeping over souls and denying themselves for the cause of the kingdom? Coming to prayer meetings and pleading for the advancement of the gospel, you know the answer as well as I do. Cut out all the sophistry.

55:31 Blow away all the smoke.

55:34 And when that stuff begins to be justified by the parents. In this church, it's the beginning of the end. It's the beginning of the end. You might as well kiss the next generation goodbye.

55:43 And all the Sunday school teachers might as well pack up and spend the time with their families. Why pour out their hours in preparation and teaching the kids? Leave them open to those influences. It'll sweep it all away.

Conclusion and Call to Action

55:57 Dear people, God help us to take the book of Proverbs as our standard of admonition. And when we do, we'll see the two dominant issues in the book of Proverbs are. Admonition that our children have a hearing and a receptive ear to our counsels, our warnings, our instruction. And admonition that our children be active in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom.

56:24 And by the grace of God, let our own lives be an example of that ongoing pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom. Let us, by the grace of God, take calculated steps. Steps, so to speak, and so to provide tools for acquiring these things that our kids will know were serious. And then have grace and moral courage actively to resist the influences that would negate that pursuit.

56:53 Particularly, not exclusively, particularly the influence of the TV and of modern music. Well, as I said, it's been a blessing for me to speed read through Proverbs three or four more times in preparation for the lesson. May I encourage you? Do it at least once and see if you can anticipate it.

57:11 We'll have some questions on the front end of next week's class. See if you can anticipate the next two of the major ones. All right? And hopefully we won't start a free-for-all of debate.

57:21 But at least it'll get you involved in seeing if indeed we're on target with these things. Well, let's pray.

57:32 Our Father, we're so thankful that we have the whole of your word. And in particular, the book of Proverbs. As we wrestle with our talents. Asks as parents.

57:42 We pray that the Holy Spirit would write upon our hearts the great emphases of this book. And that those emphases would be mirrored in our parenting of our children. Lord, for those of us who can look back and see that there were holes in our parenting. And especially in our admonition of our children.

58:04 We thank you that the blood of Jesus cleanses from parental sins. And we pray for these whose children are yet under their roofs. Oh, Lord, give them grace to lay these things to heart. And in the strength of Christ, to implement them at any cost.

58:22 Hear our cry and bless your word, we pray. In Jesus' name, amen.