Matthew 25:26-30
Avoid Laziness - Cultivate Diligence #4; Suggestions/Q&A
Pastor Martin concludes his series on 'How Not to Foul Up the Training of Your Children,' focusing on the sixth major area of admonition: avoiding laziness and cultivating diligence. He expounds Matthew 25:26-30 to demonstrate the evil nature of slothfulness, equating it with moral wickedness that can lead to damnation. Martin then provides four practical directives for parents and all believers, emphasizing personal conviction, exemplary living (Romans 12:11), tailor-made correction for children's unique tendencies, and reliance on Christ's grace (2 Corinthians 12:9). The sermon concludes with a Q&A session, further applying these principles to daily life and the role of work and recreation.
Primary Texts
Topics
Outline 8 sections · 57 min
- Introduction and Review of the 'How Not to Foul Up' Series 0:03
- Directive 1: Be Convinced of the Evil Nature of Laziness 12:15
- Directive 2: Exemplify Diligence and Fervor in Spirit 17:37
- Directive 3: Discern and Tailor Correction for Children's Laziness 25:21
- Directive 4: Look to Christ for Grace 34:40
- Q&A: Conforming to the World's View of Work and Leisure 37:40
- Q&A: Managing Neighbor Children and Cultivating Interests 46:51
- Closing Prayer and Announcements 54:57
Key Quotes
“Thou wicked and slothful, servant,”
“In other words, people will be damned for the sin of slothfulness as well as for fornication, homosexuality, drunkenness, lying, covetousness, and any other sin which is mentioned in Scripture as being the occasion of God righteously damning someone to everlasting darkness.”
“Now, many in our day call that legalism. When you get specific and detailed in moral instruction, you're called a legalist. No, you're a biblicist. As long as the motive is always gospel motivation, being meticulous in my concern about the minutia of Scripture because I love Christ and I want to live a life of devotion to Christ, that is not legalism. That is blessed liberty. That is true spirituality.”
“Your reading of that devotional book will be a mockery to God if you don't come to it from having in your legitimate calling fulfilled this directive in diligence, not slothful, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord.”
“Why? Well, I'll tell you why, because you think it's a reflection on some failure in you. Well, get beyond that. Get beyond such a self-centered perspective, and say, I want you to give me objective input.”
“As A.W. Tozer said, before I take admonition and correction for a man, I look for the oil on his forehead.”
“No, that goes by cells and little pockets of cells, by sweat and prayer and tears and spiritual agony, until by the grace of God, our minds being transformed, renewed, we are transformed into doing the will of God in this area.”
“And if you let them have all fun and games and spend all their energy, flopping around in the pool and then just piddle around in the garden for 20 minutes at the end of the day, you're teaching a terrible, terrible lesson. And so these parents, while not seeking to lay upon the children adult responsibilities for work, wanted to work into the texture of their perspective that you earn the right to recreate by working. And diligent work must precede recreation.”
Applications
All listeners
- Be convinced of the evil nature of laziness and slothfulness in your own life and in the lives of your children.
- Exhort and encourage one another in God-given duties, recognizing that no one is exempt from these directives.
- Seek to exemplify the disposition of Romans 12:11, being diligent, not slothful, and fervent in spirit, serving the Lord in your legitimate calling.
- Carefully and prayerfully discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness in your children and give needed, tailor-made correction.
- Husband and wife must be in constant observation and up-to-date communication regarding their children's behavior.
- Be secure enough before God to seek input from trusted outsiders (friends, teachers) regarding what they observe in your children, overcoming thin-skinned defensiveness.
- Singles should have the moral courage to seek accountability from discerning married people or mature singles in their assembly regarding patterns of indolence and laziness.
- Look to Christ for grace for yourselves and for your children in the cultivation of industry and diligence, trusting in His sufficient grace and wisdom.
- Do not be fashioned according to this world's spirit, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, especially concerning views on work and leisure.
- Teach children the principle that recreation is for recreating strength for tasks, and diligent work must precede recreation.
- When neighbor children join in activities, clearly explain expectations and standards, and obtain their parents' intelligent consent.
- When dealing with neighbors, be a peacemaker and, if necessary, lay blame on your own children to maintain good relations.
- Discern children's emerging patterns of interest and enthusiasm about certain tasks, guiding them toward meaningful, God-honoring vocations and marketable skills, while also cultivating hobbies.
A full transcript is available on the tab. 86 paragraphs, roughly 57 minutes.
Introduction and Review of the 'How Not to Foul Up' Series
How not to foul up the training of your children. This is cassette number 28 in a series given by Pastor Albert N. Martin in the adult Sunday school class of the Trinity Baptist Church on September 1st, 1991.
Now for those of you who are visiting and may have heard that the man standing before you runs everything with a heavy hand, you just had a clear indication that there's only one elder among us who regards himself as Lord over time. And you heard it with your own ears that he's not late. When he's here, everything is on time. Now, we do seriously and sincerely welcome into our midst today the many young men and women who are with us for this weekend conference and in some cases relatives and friends who accompanied them and trust that this will be a glorious day in the Lord's courts as we meet. In the expectation of the promised presence of the Lord Jesus in the midst of his people. And before we begin our study together, since a number of you are visiting with us, let me just give a word of explanation as to our in-house policy regarding the time between the conclusion of the adult class. We'll conclude about 25 minutes till 11 this morning.
And the morning service begins at 11. And we would ask...
We would ask that as quickly as possible you exit this auditorium. You'll have opportunity to fellowship and speak with one another in the lower foyer, in any of the hallways downstairs. Others must attend to needs concerning their families, snacks for the children, etc. And then we would ask that you keep an eye on the clock or on your own watch and begin to file into this place around 10 minutes till 11.
And once you come through those doors, we request that you take your place quietly and meditate upon the word of God, upon some hymn that may have ministered to you in recent days. But we do try to keep a climate in this particular gathering place after the Sunday school and prior to the worship that is conducive to the preparation of our hearts. And when you come up the stairs into that landing or this landing, uh...
that's a time for all conversation to stop, if you will, so no noise filters through those doors and disturbs the meditation of those preparing to worship the living God. Now, especially for the sake of our visitors, let me give a brief overview of where we are in our present series of studies in this adult class. This is lesson number 27 on the subject How Not to Foul Up the Training of Our Childhood. And in addressing this subject, I'm going to attempt in about 10 to 12 minutes to encapsulate about 22 hours of instruction.
Uh... Now, that may be a foolish attempt, but I'm going to make it anyway.
Now, in taking up this subject, we began with the consideration of that which is most crucial to the effective training of our children, and that is what I've described as the overall training of our children. So, the first thing I would like to demonstrate is the overall spiritual and emotional climate of the home of climate that will be established and manifest in first of all between a husband and wife and then in the blessing of God, when God is pleased, if and when He is pleased to grace that home with children, a climate that will be manifested in the relationship of the parents to the children and the children to their parents. God that with respect to the spiritual climate of the home, it ought to be marked by reality and transparency as opposed to hypocrisy and a closed, tight, non-communicative kind of spirituality. If indeed we would seek to rear our children desirous of the life of godliness, we ourselves must not be perfect parents or perfect Christians, but we must be real. We must be prepared to walk in a climate of spiritual reality and transparency.
And then if the training of our children is not to be fouled up, then emotionally the climate that we attain and maintain in the home must be marked by warmth, acceptance, and a willingness by the grace of God to manifest goodwill one towards another. And any home, no matter how much that home may be marked by faithful attendance at the best of churches, that is not marked by an emotional climate of warmth, acceptance, and goodwill, but with the contrasting attitudes and dispositions of coldness, rejection, and ill will, most of the training given in that home or in any other place will prove ineffectual in the lives of those children. Then moving from a consideration of the climate of the home, we then began to focus on the major task of the parents towards their children. And according to Ephesians 6 and verse 4, God has given two great means to parents, to nurture their children. Those means are chastening and admonition. And be fathers,
provoke not your children to wrath, but nurture them, be committed to their total development into adequate manhood and womanhood by means of the chastening and admonition, both of which are to be of the Lord. That is, they are to derive all of their perspectives and their implementation from the Lord himself, the Lord who has embodied his mind in his own word in Holy Scripture. And so we spent a number of weeks seeking to lay out the biblical doctrine of corporal punishment or the sanctified use of the rod in its comprehensive impact upon the nurture of our children. And now for a number of weeks, we've been concentrating on what it is to nurture our children by admonition. And we did a word study of admonition and saw that admonition, in contrast to chastening, which always involves some form of punishment, admonition is a verbal exercise, taking in instruction, taking in rebuke, reproof, encouragement, the full range of
verbal admonition delivered lovingly and authoritatively with a view to shaping and molding our children to maturity. Now that's basically the overall framework of what we've been doing, and now in recent weeks, taking the book of Proverbs as our fundamental sourcebook for godly admonition, we've asked the question, what are the major emphases in the book of Proverbs with respect respect to Solomon's admonitions of his own son. And we saw that there was one fundamental ingredient in all of the admonitory material in the book of Proverbs, and that is called in chapter 1 and verse 7, the fear of God, or the fear of the Lord, which is the chief part of knowledge. That means that in the total process of admonition, as well as chastening, the Lord's being, authority, law, presence, his position as creator, lawgiver, and judge must continually be brought into the matrix of our admonitions given to our children. That we are not imposing upon them our ways, or the ways of our culture, or simply traditions
passed on by our fathers, but we are imposing these. We are imposing standards upon them, seeking to work them into the texture of their minds and souls, and into the fabric of their lives, because it is the Lord himself who mandates it. And with the fear of God as the fundamental element in the process of admonition, we've been considering together what are the main aspects of admonition as they come to us in the book of Proverbs. And I urge the congregation...
Speaker 12 And thus far we have concentrated our attention upon six major areas that are repeated again and again and again and again and again in the book of Proverbs. I'll only name them. Parents must repeatedly admonish their children to be attentive listeners to parental instruction, and we consider talking about them...
Speaker 13. appropriate. Then important persons are completed with good ears, developed in 12 pivotal texts under that heading. Secondly, parents must repeatedly admonish their children to be active and earnest in the pursuit of true knowledge and wisdom. And we looked at 15 texts under that heading. Thirdly, parents must repeatedly admonish their children to learn, to desire, welcome, heed, rebuke, correction, and counsel. And we looked at 20 texts and we didn't exhaust those texts. In the fourth place, parents must consistently, repeatedly admonish their children to both recognize and avoid moral defilement and those people and influences that would affect them with it. Fifthly, parents must repeatedly admonish their children. There we
looked at 12 texts. And then parents must repeatedly admonish their children concerning the righteous use of their children. And we looked at 15 texts under that heading. And we looked at their tongues or the nature of godly speech. And for three class periods, we looked at some 65 to 70 texts in the book of Proverbs. There is no subject that receives more treatment in the book of Proverbs than the subject of the righteous use of the tongue. And now for a couple of weeks, we've been looking at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And we looked at the sixth of these major areas of admonition which must form the work and movement of the children. And major focal point of the emphasis of admonition, parents must admonish their children to avoid laziness and its devastating fruits, and to cultivate diligence and industry with its blessed results and rewards. Parents must admonish their children to avoid laziness and its devastating fruits, and to cultivate diligence and industry with its blessed results. And in that heading, we considered approximately 18 to 20 texts dealing with the sluggard,
Directive 1: Be Convinced of the Evil Nature of Laziness
with the lazy person, and the horrible fruits that will come from laziness, and the blessed fruits that will come from a life of diligence and industry. We completed the study of those texts last week. But I did not have time to give the practical directives. So here's the PS, and this is new material. So I did accomplish my goal of getting through the review in just about 12 to 13 minutes. If we are to implement these things in our own lives and in the lives of our children, there are four things that are crucial by way of practical directives that I would set before you as parents, as potential parents, as grandparents. As brothers and sisters seeking to exhort one another and to encourage one another in our God-given duties. So none of you sitting here this morning is exempt from these directives.
Number one, we must ourselves be convinced of the evil nature of laziness and slothfulness. We will never be able, with a good conscience and with the blessing of the Holy Spirit, repeatedly and earnestly, to admonish our children to avoid the sin of laziness and slothfulness, and to pursue the grace of diligence and industry unless we ourselves are convinced of the, not innocent nature, but the evil nature of laziness and slothfulness. And there's one text, not in Proverbs, that addresses the evil nature of laziness more powerfully than any other I know in all of Scripture. And I'd ask you to look at this text with me in Matthew chapter 25. The setting is one of the parables that our Lord Jesus spoke in conjunction with the doctrine of the second coming. And it is
the parable that has to do with people who are entrusted with talents to be invested for their Lord. And then the day of reckoning comes when the stewards are called into the presence of their master. And we read in Matthew 25, 26, these very sobering words. But his Lord answered and said unto him, this is the man who took his one talent and buried it and gave it back to his Lord at his return. His Lord answered and said unto him, Thou wicked and slothful, servant,
thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not and gather where I did not scatter, etc. Now notice what our Lord brings into the closest conjunction. His moral wickedness and turpitude and the character trait of slothfulness. And on the basis of that and that alone, this one is, verse 30, cast as an unprofitable servant into outer darkness.
And on the basis of that and that alone, this one is, verse 30, cast as an unprofitable servant into outer darkness. And on the basis of that and that alone, this one is, verse 30, cast as an unprofitable servant into outer darkness. And on the basis of that and that alone, this one is, verse 30, cast as an unprofitable servant into outer darkness. shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.
In other words, people will be damned for the sin of slothfulness as well as for fornication, homosexuality, drunkenness, lying, covetousness, and any other sin which is mentioned in Scripture as being the occasion of God righteously damning someone to everlasting darkness. Now, I ask you, do you view your own innate tendency to slothfulness and laziness as something so evil that if it were a dominant sin in your life, you could be damned for that sin alone if you were the paragon of virtue in every other area of your life?
You see, we are never going to admonish our children with any conviction and certainly not with... with a good conscience concerning the evil nature of laziness and slothfulness unless we ourselves are convinced of it.
And this is the most difficult thing to have a biblical conscience about the evils of laziness and slothfulness when we've been reared in a generation that has viewed work and diligence as a necessary evil to the end of where the action is really at, namely, leisure and pleasure. Where a man's job is viewed as a necessary evil in order to get the things he can...
that he needs to exist and to earn enough credit in terms of seniority, to have longer vacations with full pay, to have shorter working weeks, etc., etc. And in such a context, to have a conscience that feels the pressure of the Word of God is the most difficult thing. But I...
Directive 2: Exemplify Diligence and Fervor in Spirit
I say we will not be effective in admonishing our children with these texts in the book of Proverbs concerning the evil nature of sloth and laziness and the virtues of diligence in industry unless we ourselves are convinced of its evil nature. Secondly, we ourselves must seek to exemplify the disposition of Romans 12 and verse 11. If we as parents are to be effective in admonishing our children in this critical matter, we must not only be convinced of the evil nature of laziness and slothfulness, that's negative, but we must seek to exemplify the disposition of Romans 10 and verse 11. I'm sorry, Romans 12 and verse 11. After the apostle gives this summons, which the singles heard last night, this summons to entire devotedness to God under the figure of our presenting our bodies a living sacrifice wholly acceptable unto God, specific ethical directions are being given to God's people. You see, having a disposition of entire devotedness to God is not sufficient to instruct us as to how to live such a life.
We need specific, detailed, moral instruction from the Word of God. The whole notion that if you really love the Lord and are totally devoted to the Lord, you've got some self-interpreting code at work within you to tell you what's right and wrong is a totally unbiblical concept.
This is why the apostle gives a whole list of specific moral instructions in the pastoral epistles and says to both Timothy and Titus, these things command and teach. If thou put the brethren in mind of these things, thou shalt command and teach these things. be a good minister of Jesus Christ. Now, many in our day call that legalism. When you get specific and detailed in moral instruction, you're called a legalist. No, you're a biblicist. As long as the motive is always gospel motivation, being meticulous in my concern about the minutia of Scripture because I love Christ and I want to live a life of devotion to Christ, that is not legalism. That is blessed liberty. That is true spirituality. And recognizing
that and knowing that everyone at Rome who, under the pressure of the mercies of God, did desire to live a life of entire devotedness to God, Paul does not frustrate them by not giving them specific counsel as to how they can live such a life. And in that setting, he has a whole string of directives here in chapter 12, and one of them is, verse 11, "...indiligence not slothful." The only other place this word is found is in the text we looked at earlier. "...thou wicked and slothful servant." Indiligence not slothful, fervent, literally boiling in spirit, serving the Lord. He says your whole work ethic is to be one in which, you look upon your legitimate calling in life as that service to which God has called you. And in the recognition that whatever your calling in life may be, it is service rendered to the Lord, you are not to be marked as one who is slothful, that is, chest caved in, shoulders stooped over, hands in the pocket, shuffling along, and you are not to be marked as one who is slothful, that is, chest caved in, shoulders stooped over, hands in the pocket, shuffling along,
in your calling just making do in order to have enough money to pay the bills and put bread on the table. No. Rather, you are to be marked as one who is boiling in his spirit with holy enthusiasm for your God-given task in the way of your God-given calling. You are to be boiling in spirit with a sense of privilege to serve God in your calling.
And boiling in spirit, you are indeed to look upon yourself as rendering service unto God. Now, that same truth is picked up and amplified in a very unusual context. We don't have time to go into it in Ephesians, where Paul is speaking to slaves and calling them to obey their master. And he says in Ephesians 6, when you slaves obey your masters, don't do it with eye service as a man-pleaser.
But, he says, you are to do it with singleness of heart as unto the Lord. In another place, he says, for ye serve the Lord Christ. Now, think of it. The slave's master says, go take the slop bucket and feed the hogs. And he may say it in a very curt and unsympathetic way. Hey, you, grab the slop bucket and feed the hogs. Now, what's the slave to do? What a rotten, stinking job I've done.
No. When he heard that epistle read in the assembly, he was told to look beyond that churlish slave master and see behind him his Lord giving him directions. And he was with all of his heart to be the best slop bucket carrier of the whole bunch, because he was carrying slop buckets for Jesus Christ. And some of us have known what it is in temporary jobs, literally, to clean the slop bucket. And some of us have known what it is in temporary work in the wilderness. And I have seen the effects that have had on my lives. And they say that I words of sickness gain the word of God in eternity. And I say, oh, I know what good it is to be cleansed of all sorts of sins and other Loran III matter� 몰라in, these are his words I want to say.
Cleaning the licker in the morning Executive manager elephant chanterelle I can remember marvelous opportunities to witness when people would hear me sing in hymns, cleaning urinals and sifting cigarette butts out of big cans full of sand in a FACTORY. That's the only work I could get one summer. They'd say, what in the world are you doing, going around so happy, cleaning urinals, and toilets, and sifting cigarette butts? I said, at lunch break I will tell you. Thank And I have many opportunities to speak the gospel. That's what it's talking about. So you and I, if we are ever, if we have children, if in the providence of God children are to be a part of our lives, if we are to admonish them concerning the horrible nature of slothfulness and laziness and the blessedness of industry and diligence, we must not only be convinced of the evil nature of laziness and slothfulness, we must ourselves seek to exemplify the disposition of Romans 12, 11. That's what it is to be devoted to God.
Devoted to God is not just shuffling through your work doing the minimum so you can get home and read your Bible and read a good Puritan devotional book. No! Don't have such a separated life. Your reading of that devotional book will be a mockery to God if you don't come to it from having in your legitimate calling fulfilled this directive in diligence, not slothful, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord.
Directive 3: Discern and Tailor Correction for Children's Laziness
Third directive, and this is exclusively now to parents and those who someday will be parents, we must carefully and prayerfully discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness in our children and give paler-made admonitions, or the need for the right to correct and correct and correct, and give a corrective and a corrective and a corrective and a corrective and a corrective and a corrective correction to them. We must carefully and prayerfully discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness in our children and give needed, tailor-made correction. You see, no two children are alike. I had someone just this week. In fact, I had two parents this week call me, having some disciplinary problems with their children.
Now, one was in a face-to-face counseling session. The other was in a telephone counseling session. And in the face-to-face counseling session, the mother and father sat there and laughed and said, we don't know where the second kid came from. Well, they know where the kid came from.
They know where and how that child was conceived. They don't forget that the wife was big with child until she gave birth to that second one. But in terms of patterns of behavior, he is so radically different from the first one, that they were expressing their frustration. We don't know where he came from.
No two children are alike. In generic terms and specifically in terms of how inbred sin will cut channels of laziness. You may have one child who's greatly enthusiastic about doing outside yard work. It's no test of his disposition to diligence to tell him to go out and cut the lawn.
I mean, that's like giving him two bucks and saying, go down and buy a triple dip cone. But oh, when it comes to cleaning up his room, that's like asking him to drink three pints of castor oil followed up with a pint of milk of magnesia. And that becomes very, very evident in the development of the child. And then lo and behold, the brother or sister, just 18 months younger or older, just the opposite, would piddle around and make that room just so perfect that you could have a military white glove inspection and have the keenest-eyed military superior come out and give it the highest ranking.
But to pull one weed around the shrubs is worse than having wisdom teeth pulled when they get their wisdom teeth. And you've got to recognize that and not have wooden rules in the house with respect to giving tasks. But you must seek to assign those tasks and follow through in the admonitions with respect to how they are performing those tasks in a way that clearly indicates that you and your wife are carefully, prayerfully seeking to discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness in your children and give tailor-made correction in those specific areas. If you don't do this, you are not nurturing them in terms of their own distinct individuality. And as with so many things we've considered, this means that husband and wife must be in constant observation of the children, in constant up-to-date communication with one another regarding what they observe in the children. And hear me carefully, they must be secure enough before God to seek,
the input of outsiders with respect to what they see in their children, i.e., trusted friends in the church family with whom the children play. If the children are placed in a school, whether a Christian school or a public school, to go to those teachers and say, you will see things that I don't see, I'm not thin-skinned about my kids, here's the patterns, I see, my wife sees, here's how we're working on them, but surely in the totally different setting of the social structure and the different nature of the relationship between teacher and child, as contrast with parent and child, no doubt aspects of strength and weakness will emerge. Please tell us! I'm grieved when I hear how thin-skinned some of you parents are when a teacher tries to point out your children's faults. You immediately come to that point, and you come to their defense.
Why? Well, I'll tell you why, because you think it's a reflection on some failure in you. Well, get beyond that. Get beyond such a self-centered perspective, and say, I want you to give me objective input.
I heard just this past week, in meeting with a pastor friend of mine, after homeschooling his son through the eighth grade, he's putting him, after much wrestling, into a public school setting for his high school year, the first high school year. And he not only explained to his congregation in a private congregational meeting why he was doing it, but you know what he did? He said, look, my wife and I are going to be monitoring the fruit of this totally new setting in the life of our son. However, we know that there may be manifestations of this totally new setting that we don't see.
And he pleaded with the whole congregation to be eyes and ears for him, and said, if you see, a lessening of general respect, if you see the emerging of attitudes and dispositions contrary to Biblical norms, please come to us and tell us, so we can accurately monitor the development of our son. Now, would you be prepared to do that? If not, why not? Thin-skinned?
More concerned to protect your image as successful mother and father, than to nurture your children? Nurture them! And use every means at your disposal, including the body of Christ, and those who in the providence of God are given places of influence with your children, and seek to discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness, and give needed tailor-made correction. And stick at it, even though you may send the children out of your home at mature marriageable age, feeling you never accomplished your goals, at least you can sit down with the prospective daughter-in-law or son-in-law, as my wife and I have done, and said, look, here are some areas where our son or daughter manifest a pattern of laziness, but it's not our fault. This is what we did to try to correct it. And we told them, from the cradle to the marriage altar, this is what we did, it didn't take, so please don't get mad at us. We tried.
That's right. And you want to have a good conscience, that's your try. You made an effort, and you welcomed the input of others in helping you with that effort. It may be that for some of you singles, what you need to do is have the moral courage to go to the married people and the mature singles in your own assembly and say, look, if someday I'm going to be a parent and take seriously that exhortation given on that Labor Day weekend by Pastor Martin to, prayerfully discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness in my kids and give tailor-made counsel, I've got to start with myself and begin to make yourself accountable to discerning, not to every Tom, Dick, and Harry who just would like a chance to pick on you and feel important, but prove him, discerning people. As A.W. Tozer said, before I take admonition and correction for a man, I look for the oil on his forehead.
And what he meant was, I look to see someone in whom, there is manifested a walk in the fullness of the Spirit. Someone who is himself and herself an example of heightened grace in this area. And you say, look, I want you to be brutally honest with me. Wherever you see patterns of indolence and laziness and the disposition of a sluggard, will you please tell me?
And then will you help me? How have you overcome that tendency? Or how has someone you know overcome that tendency? So that by the grace of God, we have paved the way in this matter.
Directive 4: Look to Christ for Grace
And then fourthly, fourth admonition. If our admonition to others is to be effective in this area, we must look to Christ for grace for ourselves and for our children in the cultivation of this disposition of industry and diligence. We must look to Christ for grace for ourselves and for our children. The scripture says, my grace is sufficient for thee.
2 Corinthians 12, 9. My grace is sufficient for you as a parent to know how to deal with that deeply rooted, many tentacle disposition of laziness in your son, in your daughter. You can't seem to sort out the root system, pull apart the tentacles, trace them down to their end. But God's grace is sufficient.
He has said in James 1, if any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all men liberally and upbraids not, and it shall be given him. And so we must look to Christ for grace for ourselves and for our children. Not only grace, to have wisdom and discernment in properly assessing their need, but ultimately looking to Christ to work this very grace in them. For when Paul is giving thanks to the Thessalonians, he says that their labor, born of love, was the fruit of God's grace in them.
We give thanks to God always for you all. 1 Thessalonians 1, 2. Making mention of you in our prayers, remembering without ceasing your work of faith and labor of love, as well as your patience of hope in our Lord Jesus. When he heard that the Thessalonians were a people who were working out of the matrix of a believing heart, laboring unto toil and pain and weariness impelled by holy love, he gave thanks to God for he knew that it was 1 Thessalonians 1, 2. making mention of you in our prayers, answering as he did to God. who implanted the faith and love in their hearts. And you see, ultimately, whatever we may be able to do in common grace, in the molding, the nurturing of the grace of diligence and industry in our children, ultimately, if it is to be a fixed principle in their hearts, our hope must be that God will work special grace in them so that by the power of the Holy Spirit, 1 1 Thessalonians 1, 2, out of a multiple source of life, motive of love to Christ, they will cultivate the grace of diligence and of industry.
Q&A: Conforming to the World's View of Work and Leisure
Well, that's what I wanted to say as a P.S. and a completion of our treatment now of this sixth area of focused, admonitory concern, namely parents must admonish their children to avoid laziness and slothfulness and to cultivate diligence and industry. And with just 15 minutes to go, I've got much more than 15 minutes of material to move on to area number seven, which is going to be that parents must admonish their children to seek to attain the moral nobility of controlling their own spirits.
Parents must admonish their children to seek to attain the moral nobility of controlling their own spirits. But I think in the light of the time, it could well be that there's a good backlog of questions and concerns that you may have. So before we move on, and you'll indicate whether we should move on by whether or not you have questions, I wonder if particularly the parents who've been here through the previous studies have questions and perhaps some passages that have come to your mind that would help to buttress some of these things on this whole issue of admonishing our children. With reference to diligence and against slothfulness and laziness.
Are there questions? It's been a while since we've given you that opportunity.
Yes, Mr. Davies, very good point. And for any who couldn't hear it over on this side, Mr. Davies pointed us to verse two of Romans 12, which we considered last night as well, that if we are to live a life of entire devotedness to God, we must obey the summons of verse two with its negative and its positive elements, be not fashioned according to this world, that is, this present age, the spirit of the age. Don't let it fashion you in any area. But, notice the contrast, positively be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Godliness starts with right thinking.
Ungodliness remains entrenched when we're thinking like the world. Think like the world and you'll...
Act like the world, for as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he. Guard thy heart, for out of it are the issues of life. And Paul recognized that. He knew of no pattern of progressive sanctification that started with the feelings or with the will.
It started with the judgment, with the noose, with the understanding, with the mind. So he said, on the one hand, you must not let the world squeeze you into its mold, particularly in the context, its mold of thought. You must not let your thinking about anything, but be transformed in the totality of your devoted humanity that has been given up to God as a living sacrifice. And how are you to be transformed?
As your thinking is, first of all, influenced by the truth of God, by the Word of God. And only as it is will you then prove in your experience what it is to do...
Through the will of God, the thing that in itself is the good, the acceptable, and the perfect. And Mr. Davies' point is, as the Scripture says, they comparing themselves with themselves are not wise. We live in such a soft, lazy, self-indulgent generation, or, on the other hand, the workaholic generation.
You see, the two extremes are part and parcel of our society that left simply to absorb the spirit of the world. And part of this age will not be godly men and women in this area, nor will we rear children who have godly perspectives in this area. God says, six days shalt thou labor. Our society says, four, and at the most five days shalt thou labor, and two days are fun days.
Sunday is fun day. And the fundamental antipathy to the Lord's Day Sabbath is not biblical and theological. That's smoke. The fundamental antipathy to the Lord's Day Sabbath is not biblical and theological.
Empathy of our generation to the Lord's Day Sabbath is moral and ethical. Who is God without a day and tell me what to do with that day? It's the same thing with the so-called new morality. It's simply people saying, I won't have God monkeying around with my hormones and my sex urges.
I'll do what I want to do. I'll do what I'm inclined to do. Now they're going to give marvelous scientific justification by saying, homosexuals have a different structure in the hypothalamus.
That'll be the new cell job that's just come out in the news. Well, you see, in all of these things, be not conformed to this present age. Get your perspective about the nobility of labor and diligence, not from the world, but from the Word of God. And even as Baxter said way back in the 1600s, he said, what a shame that a child comes to age five or six, before he realizes that life is something more than playing games.
We've got many who graduate from college and still haven't made that discovery. They go to college at their parents' expense or at my expense, on student loans that they have no intention of paying back for fun and games. The vast majority.
Well, then you see, for people like that suddenly to be saved by the grace of God, God just does not send down from heaven in a fully, in a fully, encapsulated package a biblical perspective on the nobility of diligence and labor. And God doesn't reach in and cut out all at once all of that inbred, preconditioned disposition to be a lazy, good-for-nothing moocher and leech who sucks off the labors of society and the labors of mom and dad. No, that goes by cells and little pockets of cells, by sweat and prayer and tears and spiritual agony, until by the grace of God, our minds being transformed, renewed, we are transformed into doing the will of God in this area. Very vital point that Mr. Davies has made, and we must constantly ask ourselves, is my thinking influenced by the word of God? I remember one of our couples at the beginning of this summer who were blessed with a pool in their backyard, and they were seeking my counsel.
This summer or last summer it was. Time goes so quickly. They said, what would be a reasonable amount of time to require work in our garden before anybody can jump in the pool? They wanted to teach the children the principle that recreation was just that, recreating our strength and our faculties for that which is our task, namely work.
And if you let them have all fun and games and spend all their energy, flopping around in the pool and then just piddle around in the garden for 20 minutes at the end of the day, you're teaching a terrible, terrible lesson. And so these parents, while not seeking to lay upon the children adult responsibilities for work, wanted to work into the texture of their perspective that you earn the right to recreate by working. And diligent work must precede recreation.
And that's one of the things the ways they were seeking to implement that principle. Now the world would say, oh, that's cruel. Let kids be kids and let them have, yeah, but you see, kids become adults. And what they are as adults is the accumulation of what they've been becoming as kids. And that's why we must start early in this crucial area. All right, time for another question or two? Comment? Yes. Linda?
Q&A: Managing Neighbor Children and Cultivating Interests
I don't know that we ever had that blessed problem. When our kids, one of the reasons we kept the garden when our kids were younger was for that very reason. It wasn't that we got that much produce. One or two summers we did. We put up some 50, 60, quart and a half things of green beans, I remember. But the rest of the time, the rabbits and the moles and everything else would just wait until stuff. I'd feel a melon and say, ah, honey, tomorrow I'm going to pick that thing. It's just about dead ripe. I'd go out to pick it that next morning. It was nothing but a shell, something had eaten out the hole inside of it. But the discipline of the kids having to weed the garden. The rest was good. And I don't remember, Linda, did we ever have the neighbor kids come over and say, hey, this looks great. Can we join you? However, I think if they did, I would explain to
them what I expected, what the standards were for my own children, and that those standards were not to be eroded by the presence of those kids. Then I would check with their parents and say, look, your Johnny and your Susie have noticed that my kids are out weeding from 8 until 10 in the morning before they go in. And I'd say, well, I'm going to go in to the little kiddie pool or the backyard pool or off to the local pool or lake. And your kids have come over and said they'd like to help them. Do you have any objection if we allow them to work with my kids? Well, no. Well, let me explain what that will mean. I will expect that their presence will not detract from my children, that they will be doing thus and thus. Do I have your consent? It would be very crucial in maintaining a good
testimony with your neighbors to make sure that they understand that they're not going to be out weeding from 8 until 10 in the morning before they go in to the pool or the backyard pool or off to the backyard pool or off to the lake. And I would ask that they understand what the kids have requested and to get their consent. In that way, you're recognizing the sovereignty of their right to govern what their children do. And I would not do anything like that without having the parents' intelligent consent to whatever I required, and then I'd monitor it. And if it appeared that they were using it to start throwing little mud balls at one another, you know, pick a weed, throw three mud balls, pick another weed, throw four, pick a weed, then chop up a worm, whatever, you know. Kids will do. And to dare one another to eat a half and dare another one to eat a third. I mean, kids do all kinds of crazy things. If after due admonition that you're serious and it's not
working out, then you'd have to tell your kids and the neighbor's kids, look, this is just not working out. You're distracting one another. Then call the parents. Don't let the kids get the report. Is this how the older hollered and screamed and kicked out? No, no. You get to them first.
And you say, look, I just spoke to your kids very quietly and softly and nice and sweetly, but I told them it was all over because it isn't working. And I want you to know it's not because I have anything against your kids, but my kids are just not mature enough to stick at their work with your kids there. Lay the blame on your kids. I mean, with neighbors, I mean, that's touchy business. Wherever you can, without violating your conscience, lay the blame on your own kids. In dealing with neighbors, anything like that, be a peacemaker. Blessed are the peacemakers. All right, does that give you some practical directives? All right.
All right. Time for one more question. I mean, the parents on this matter of admonitions to diligence. Yes, son, it's a very good question and I think a vital issue that perhaps in some other context would warrant having a whole hour given to it. But basically, I think it comes under this heading of number three. As we carefully and prayerfully discern the native tendencies and emerging patterns of laziness in our children, we will also, notice the emerging patterns of interest and enthusiasm about certain tasks. And as we do, we want to begin to help the child to see that that native inclination in that direction may well be an indication of the way in which God is going to guide them into their meaningful
and God-honoring task in life. Now, with regard to our daughters, I believe we should assume that their role is to be a part of their life. And I think that's a very good question. And it is going to be that of wife and mother. While seeking to find the other areas of interest and inclination so that we can guide them to developing what we called with your sisters, a back-up system, a back-up system until such time as God gives them a husband or wife. Or if God does not give a husband, I'm sorry, give them a husband, that they have an area in which they can work with a sense of meaningful contribution to society, a sense of dignity, and fulfillment, and it ought not to be just the idea, well, you can go on out and flip hamburgers at McDonald's until somebody throws a ring on your finger. No, because we have no promise from God, as we saw last night,
the singles, that God has a right to give us a wife or a husband. We have no right to bind God to that. So we must seek even in our daughters, and if they show keenness of mind and a real interest in a given field that can become a marketable skill, then we ought to cultivate that along with those interests that could never become a marketable skill, but that may be a good hobby or avocation. And that's the problem with some parents. They see a child's interest in an area, and they so cultivate that, never thinking, wait a minute, this thing will not produce a marketable skill. And so a guy goes to college and gets his degree in the area of his interest, and the job market spits him out. And every single turn, he could have a marvelously fruitful hobby with what he learned, getting his degree. But he couldn't earn a dime, except when he goes to sell his hobby, whatever it is, if it's something that had some substance to it.
So with our daughters and with our sons, in monitoring this whole matter of the things that they seem to have a more natural inclination to do that are good in themselves, I use the illustration of the kid that loves to give. He loves to sit out and pull weeds and do outside work, but hates to clean his room up. You've got the kid that just loves to sit and read and has a peculiar interest in a given area, but seems to have very little eye-to-hand coordination. When you try to get him to teach him, you're going to teach him how to change the oil, and it used to be you'd teach a kid how to change the spark plugs and set the gap on the car so he could do his own tune-ups.
But the poor guy can't even know the left from the right side from a pipe wrench. I mean, he tries to grab the pipe. He tries to grab the pipe with the curved side, doesn't see, you turn the side with the jaws on it. I mean, he's just a klutz.
And eye-to-hand coordination just isn't there. The same way with some kids with athletics. You put a baseball bat in their hands and tell them to swing, and you know once, you could spend a hundred hours and you'd still never teach the kid how to hit a ball. Well, don't torture him, trying to impose something on him for which God hasn't put him together.
So in this matter, my counsel would be in a nutshell, in this merging development, of evident interest and non-interest, seek to seize that material and relate it to the long-term projection of giving guidance and seeking to secure the proper kind of educational or vocational training that will suit them for a legitimate calling in life. While our time is gone, let's pray and thank God for his help and ask the Lord to give us grace in these things.
Closing Prayer and Announcements
Our Father, we are so thankful that we have the Scriptures as a lamp unto our feet and a light to our pathway. We thank you that we are not left at the mercy of the so-called experts, for we know that the expert opinion of today is the occasion of mockery by the same world tomorrow. But we thank you that forever, O Lord, your Word is settled in heaven, and though heaven and earth pass away, your Word shall never pass away. We pray that you bless our considerations of this subject of industry and diligence and the evil nature of sloth and laziness.
Help us to lay to heart these practical directives, to implement them in the strength of the Spirit, and then wisely to apply them to our children. Bless us as we continue to prepare our hearts for the hour of worship to come, and may this be a glorious day in your courts, for your praise and for our profit, we ask in Jesus' name. Amen. You have been listening to How Not to Foul Up the Training of Your Children by Pastor Albert N. Martin.
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This transcript was generated by automated speech recognition and may contain errors. It is provided for study and reference only; the audio recording is the authoritative source.
Passages Expounded
This parable is central to establishing the severe, damnable nature of slothfulness, which Martin argues is often underestimated.
This verse provides the positive command for diligence and fervor in spirit, serving as a key directive for exemplary living.
Texts Expounded
Also Referenced
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The Biblical Training of Our Children, Part 4
Ephesians 6:1-4
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Ephesians 6:4
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Training Children
Deuteronomy 6:4-9
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The Christian Man With His Children, Part 2
Acts 24:16
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