During the Session, Part 1

Introduction: The Cruciality of Treating Problems Biblically

0:03 Now we pick up again after two weeks, brethren, our attempts to lay hold of some of the basic teaching of the Word of God and the counsel of others with respect to what is commonly called pastoral counseling, but which I remind you again and again is a dimension of pastoral ministry in many ways not essentially in its essence different from what we do when we preach and teach publicly, though circumstantially in many areas there is a tremendous difference. Now after giving the general introduction and overview and the presuppositional framework, we began to address guidelines for pastoral counseling. And in our previous session we covered large letters A and B, and now we take up large letters C, treating the problems. Once we've ascertained that we ought to take on this situation that will involve us in pastoral counseling, we have prepared ourselves and the person with whom or those with whom we are going to minister. Then we come to actually treating the problems after hopefully making an accurate and thorough diagnosis. And by way of introduction, before we get into the general directions in a specific way, I want to underline how crucial this aspect of our study is.

1:28 One of the marks of a true shepherd who is a gift of Christ to his children, his church, is that he fits the description of Jeremiah 3 and verse 15. In Jeremiah 3 and verse 15, God says that under the new covenant, I will give you shepherds according to my heart who shall feed you with knowledge and with understanding. And so the shepherds after God's own heart of such as fit this description, they feed the sheep of Christ with knowledge and with understanding, understanding. They will be able to administer comfort and encouragement where these are appropriate.

2:08 They will be able to impart proper biblical perspectives where these are the most critical need. But they will also be able to do what 1 Thessalonians 5, 12 says, know them that are over you in the Lord and admonish you. And they will be prepared in the one-to-one ministry to fulfill the mandate of 2 Timothy 4, 2 and following to preach the word. They will herald the message.

2:35 They will do it in season, out of season. They will reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long-suffering and with teaching. And they will therefore seek to avoid some of those marks of the false shepherds and the false prophets. And many of those are given to us in passages such as Matthew 23, Old Testament passages, but I'm thinking particularly of two of them, one from Jeremiah and one from Ezekiel.

3:02 In Jeremiah 6, verses 13 and 14, this is God's complaint against the false prophets. For from the least of them, even to the greatest of them, everyone is given to covetousness. And from the prophet, even unto the priest, everyone deals falsely. They have healed also the hurt of my people slightly, saying, peace, peace, when there is no peace.

3:29 The mark of the false prophet is that he lays, he lays a plaster upon the wound without dealing with the wound itself. He says, peace, peace. And often this is what people want. They want relief from the pain that their spiritual abnormalities are causing them.

3:46 And unless we are men endowed with the spirit of grace and of wisdom and discernment, we will end up unwittingly in the category of the false prophet, giving peace when there is no true peace. Or Ezekiel 13, in verse 22, another passage, in which God indicts the false prophets.

4:07 Because you have with lies grieved the heart of the righteous, whom I have not made sad, and strengthened the hands of the wicked, that he should not return from his wicked way and be saved alive. Therefore, you shall no more see false visions, nor divine divinations. For I will deliver my people out of your hand, and you shall know that I am the Lord. This is a frightening text.

4:32 Here is a situation in which those, who ought not to have been grieved, are grieved and made sad. And those who ought to have been made sad are strengthened in their wickedness. And that this occurs through the official mouthpieces of God. And when we come to the matter of pastoral counseling, how we need to plead with God, that in seeking to treat the problem, we will on the one hand, have the marks of those who are shepherds after God's own heart, feeding with knowledge and with understanding, where wounds need to be made, we are willing to wound and wound deeply, and leave people in a counseling session without a shred of peace, if there is no warrant for a shred of peace.

5:14 But not leave anyone with a tear upon his cheek, who ought to leave with a smile upon his face and a hallelujah upon his lips. And so it's critical, brethren, that in treating the problems, we recognize that we are right in the nexus of what it means to be a true shepherd after God's own heart, or to be a false shepherd. How much we will need to have imparted and sustained within us the disposition and pattern of the great apostle as described in Colossians 1, 28 and 29, whom we preach, teaching every man, warning every man, not just teaching, teaching in itself, yes, good, noble, needed, but not just leaving the teaching to do its own work. But the apostle says that he was prepared and engaged in this ministry of Christ, proclaiming him, admonishing every man, and teaching every man in all wisdom, that we may present every man perfect or mature in Christ, whereunto I labor also, striving according to his working, which works in me mightily. When are we to have the disposition to take the words of Paul to Titus, rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith? It's relatively easy to do that from the pulpit.

6:34 You don't know if the arrow's going to, stick where it ought to stick. But when it's one-to-one in the pastoral situation, and to graciously look a man in the eye and say, brother, that is wicked, and the word of God describes what you're saying and doing as utter wickedness, to sit and face your own flesh and blood as I've done today,

6:53 and say, that is utterly without from the word of God.

7:03 You don't have the courage for that. And the face of God before you to do it, you don't belong in the place of a shepherd to the individual. On the other, to be able where necessary to say with Paul, we were gentle among you. As a nurse, a wet nurse, nourishing her own children, a woman who loves children enough to make a living by sharing her breast with the fruit of another's womb.

7:24 What is she like when she has her own child at her own breast? The same Paul who says, rebuke them sharply, says we were gentle among you. And if we, by personality, temperament, external influences, get locked in to say, well, I'm only faithful if I'm rebuking, and sharply, I'm only faithful if I'm gentle as a wet nurse. We are at best imbalanced, and we are at worst false shepherds.

7:49 And that pertains not just to the pulpit, but it pertains to the individual ministry to the sheep of Christ. Therefore, my brethren, as part of our preparation for every session, we must not only pray for wisdom, for understanding, compassion, and empathy, but for the moral courage to be so delivered from the fear of man that there will be that sanctified, objectivity that we will know under the tutelage of the Holy Spirit that in this given situation to feed with true knowledge and understanding and to bring the appropriate word, deliverance from the fear of man will enable us to cut deeply and lay bare the wound. Or, in a given situation, to know that we are to pour in all that we can of the balm of Gilead and to lay upon that open wound the oil and wine of gospelness and the gospel promises and gospel encouragement. And we will need constantly to bring to mind the words of Proverbs 28 and verse 23. And this is all just a sort of a rambling introduction to the importance of this matter of treating the problem. Proverbs 28 and verse 23.

9:01 He that rebukes a man shall afterward find more favor than he that flatters with the tongue, the implication being in the immediate he will have little or not much, favor. He's got to wait for his favor and approbation when the stiffer medicine has done its work. Likewise, in Proverbs 27 and verse 6, faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are profuse. And unless you are constantly delivered from an inordinate fear of men and some subtle desire for the approbation of men is your primary concern, you will not know whether or not you are in the posture of, giving faithful wounds or whether you are giving kisses that prove yourself to be an enemy and not a friend to the souls of men. Well then, with that introduction underscoring how important this subject is, treating the problems, let's take up, first of all, the general directions. The general directions. And you will notice that we begin with the negative, don't give counsel without studied consideration.

General Directions for Treating Problems

10:09 That's general direction number one. To put it in colloquial language, don't talk off the top of your head. Or, you've heard the saying, aim before you shoot. Well, let's look at a couple of texts that certainly point in that direction.

10:25 Proverbs 29 and verse 20.

10:29 Do you see a man that is hasty in his words? There is more hope of a fool than of him. So to be hasty in our words in any situation generically and certainly when we are seeking to treat a spiritual problem is to put ourselves in the category of a fool. Chapter 17 in Proverbs and verse 27.

10:52 Proverbs 17 and verse 27. He that spares his words has knowledge and he that is of a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool, when he holds his peace, is counted wise. When he shuts his lips, he's esteemed as prudent.

11:09 Your silence in a counseling session may cause you to go up in the estimation, to the one you're counseling, saying, oh, how much. Pastor must know that he's not telling me. I mean, that's a bit of the irony of this passage. Even a fool, when he holds his peace, is counted wise.

11:22 At least he's manifesting, he has control over his own spirit. And it may be, may be, that there is some wisdom that is not just pouring out. James 1 in verse 19. Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak.

11:38 Now there it's in the context of speech that apparently spills over into anger, anger and wrath. For the wrath of man works not the righteousness of God, but certainly the principle is a vital one. Swift to hear, slow to speak. Don't give counsel without studied consideration with respect to what you are giving as counsel.

11:59 Far better to say, as some of us have had to do dozens if not hundreds of times, I have nothing definitive to lay before you. I will pray. I will search the scriptures. I will ask God to give me light.

12:12 There is nothing degrading to say you are not the fountain of all wisdom in a given situation. Nothing degrading, nothing demeaning to acknowledge at this point and it's frustrating and you tell the person that I wish I knew what medicine on God's apothecary shelf was suited. I know there's some there somewhere but I can't put my hand on it. Will you pray God will help us to find what that particular remedy is.

12:37 Don't give counsel without studied consideration. Secondly, under general directions, constantly remind yourself of your limitations. I put down Psalm 139, the whole Psalm. I listed it because it's the Psalm that celebrates the gracious comforting concept of God's absolute omniscience.

12:59 He has searched us. He knows us. He knows our down sitting, our uprising, understands our thought from afar. We make our bed in hell.

13:06 He is there up into heaven. He is there. Jump on the first rays of the sun as it shoots across the eastern horizon. Over the sea, the wings of the morning, even there.

13:16 That's God, but that's not us. And we need to recognize the truth in the text familiar to many of us. First Kings 839 be first Kings chapter eight verse 39 be Solomon's prayer here in heaven, your dwelling place and forgive and do and render to every man according to all his ways whose heart you know for you, even you, only know the hearts of all the children of men. God alone has omniscience and therefore many times your counsel would be should be counts couched in such words as these.

13:58 Could it be that this is the problem? Does it appear that perhaps we are dealing with a situation that takes us into this or that area of concern? It appears to me that. Perhaps this may be the given situation.

14:19 Proverbs 16 and verse 23 is a helpful text with regard to this word of general direction. Proverbs 16 and verse 23. The heart of the wise instructs his mouth and adds learning to his lips. The heart of the wise is constantly instructing the mouth of that wise man and adds.

14:49 Real learning to his lips. And one of the principles that is embedded in the heart of the wise man is the recognition that he has tremendous limitations. And though he is seeking to make an accurate diagnosis and though hopefully there is a growing well of experience and insight and discernment at the end of the day, man looks upon the outward appearance. God alone looks upon the heart.

15:13 Remind yourself of your limitations, especially if you gain any measure of experience. And an earned reputation for being a wise and helpful counselor. Never forget Jeremiah 17, 5 to 9. Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his arm and whose heart departs from the Lord.

15:31 We always need to take the posture of Solomon. I am but a little child. I know not how to go out or how to come in. How can I judge this?

15:38 I so great a people. The man to whom God says, why is this man on the face of the earth? He said, I'm a little child. And he maintained so long as he maintained that spirit.

15:48 He was blessed of God. Third general direction address issues from the simple and the more obvious to the complex and the more subtle on the simple and the more obvious to the complex. Oh, there we are. I got a fancy glass.

16:05 I was looking for a styrofoam cup and didn't see any white. Thank you. All right. Address the issues from the simple and more obvious to the complex and the more subtle.

16:13 Let me illustrate. You're walking down the street and you see a kid fall off his bike. Is. I have done on several occasions in my pilgrimage and you come over to the poor kid.

16:22 He's got his leg caught in the handlebars. I mean, he's all twisted up like a like a Gumby doll. His knees are skinned. He's got a gash on his arm.

16:31 And then you find out the kid is lost and doesn't know where his home is. So what are you going to do? Well, the first thing you do is try to get him disentangled from the handlebars. And if you've got a handkerchief and he's bleeding in his arm, you put a tourniquet on it.

16:46 And then you seek to see whether or not. Is he in bad enough shape that we need to call a rescue squad and get him to the hospital and do a CAT scan on his head? Make sure he hasn't busted his skull, whether they're internal injuries. Then you seek to find out where he lives and all of the rest.

17:01 But you start, you see, with the simple and the more obvious and then move to the more complex and to the more subtle. You see that with regard to the Good Samaritan. He saw his situation. He administered some first aid, put him on the donkey, took him to the end and said, now take care of him.

17:18 There are some ongoing concerns and they need to be addressed. He did the first aid, the immediate and then the long term therapy. And so it is, as we are engaged in pastoral counseling, we need to address the issues from the simple and the more obvious to the complex and to the more subtle. Fourth general guideline is seek to isolate, eliminate and diffuse complicating emotional or physical problems before dealing more directly with spiritual problems.

17:48 And I've said, remember first, kings. That shouldn't be kegs. That should be first, kings. So we can make a correction.

17:55 Bart, are you making those corrections for me, if you will, please? And we can pass those on. I don't know how you...

18:01 What's the proper way to abbreviate kings? I don't know if I've seen it. Oh, so we'll put kings, all right? And what we're remembering there, of course, is the whole incident with regard to Elijah.

18:12 When his servant was dispirited, discouraged, had a death wish, was running from his post of duty, God did not clobber his conscience until he had allowed him to have a season of rest and physical refreshment. God isolated, eliminated, and diffused, complicated emotional and physical problems before dealing more directly with Elijah's spiritual problems. He had assumed that his knowledge of God's work was the extent of God's work. And that's a fundamental spiritual problem.

18:43 When you begin to think that only what you see of the work of God is the measure of the actual work of God, you're in bad trouble. Well, that's what happened to Elijah.

18:51 And God was going to tell him, no, my work has been carried on. I've committed myself to have a remnant according to the election of grace, and I have reserved for myself 7,000. But God doesn't even straighten out his skewed thinking on that fundamental spiritual problem before he isolates, eliminates, and diffuses complicated emotional and physical problems. For example, you may have a woman dealing with temper and unreasonableness, and then he's become, well, before you assume its unmortified spirit of anger and resentment, ask her, have you charted these outcroppings?

19:28 Well, no. Have you considered that possibly they're related to your hormonal cycles? Well, no. Well, let's do that.

19:37 I want you to take a calendar, and I want you to mark down the time of the month when you're, and it may be after a couple of months of doing this, you find out that her unreasonableness is almost predictable within 8 to 10 days. And you've got to give her an article on PMS. You don't give her a book on the mortification of sin. You isolate, eliminate, and defuse complicating emotional or physical problems before dealing more directly with the spiritual problems.

20:07 Someone may have splitting headaches, making them unusually vulnerable to irritability. Now, to be irritable and to speak out hasty, hurtful, cutting words, that's sin. We're not going to justify, but it may well be that they've got hypoglycemia.

20:24 Hypoglycemia. And we need to encourage them to take a blood sugar fasting test, a glucose tolerance test, and find out if that's their problem. So when I say isolate, eliminate, defuse, complicating emotional or physical problems before dealing more directly with the spiritual, this is what I'm seeking to underscore by way of a general direction. Fifth general direction, always seek to suit the remedial counsel to the presently deceased.

20:49 To the presently discovered need. Suit the remedial counsel to the presently discovered need. Proverbs 25, 11, and 12. Very helpful text.

21:01 A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in network of silver. A beautiful work of art. As an earring of gold and an ornament of fine gold, so is a wise reprover upon an obedient, obedient ear. Here is that child of God that has a fundamental disposition of obedience.

21:25 No present controversy with God. No desire to justify, excuse, extenuate sin that may be pointed out in the counseling session. And you sit there as a wise servant of God, ready to bring reproof where needed. When that reproof suits the state of heart and the real circumstance of this person's need, it's a work of spiritual art.

21:49 A work of spiritual art. And therefore, we should, under God, by way of a general direction, always seek to suit the remedial counsel to the presently discovered need. Proverbs 15, 23 is another text that points us in this direction. A man hath joy in the answer of his mouth, and a word in due season.

22:13 How good it is! The word is not only true in itself, but it's given at the right time. It's a word in due season. How good that is!

22:24 Now, in the light of this, you notice some of the subheadings. Sometimes the bulk of your counsel will be advice concerning a course of action to be taken. The bulk of it will be advice with respect to a course of action to be taken. And that should be Proverbs 11 and verse 14, if you'll correct that reference.

22:47 Proverbs 11 and verse 14. Where? Where no wise guidance is, the people fall. But in the multitude of counselors there is safety.

22:55 It may become evident that the primary issue that is the central issue in this particular counseling session involves as a shepherd after God's own heart feeding this sheep with knowledge and understanding is to give advice concerning a course of action to be taken. In another time, it may be comfort in the midst of present grief. 1 Thessalonians 4, 18 Wherefore comfort wherefore comfort comfort one another with these words. And though there may be many other perceived needs, it is not the critical need which needs the focused counsel at that particular time.

23:32 And so if advice is the dominant need with respect to a course of action, principles of guidance, then don't feel discouraged that you've not covered the full gamut of all the perceived needs in this particular sheep. Or, as we've indicated, comfort, or it may be rebuke or admonition, in the face of sin and error discovered. And you must not load yourself with false guilt that if a given counseling session was dominant with rebuke and admonition, if that's what was needed, then that is the medicine that you ought to administer at that particular time. Proverbs 19 and verse 25.

24:09 Familiar words to us. Proverbs 19 and verse 25. Smite a scoffer and the simple will learn prudence. And reprove one who has understanding and he will understand knowledge.

24:24 You see, brethren, as I indicated in our lectures at one point two weeks ago, few things, few things are more indicative of your fundamental character and mine than how we respond to warranted reproof. A man of understanding is what he is because he's had the discipline of received reproof upon his life. This text is clear. Smite a scoffer and the simple will learn prudence.

24:52 You see how a scoffer responds to being smitten and others will learn from his negative example. However, reprove one who has understanding and he will understand knowledge. Again, Proverbs 13 and verse 18. Proverbs 13 and verse 18.

25:13 Poverty and shame shall be to him that refuses correction, but he that regards reproof shall be honored. Poverty and shame. Poverty and shame. Eventually, the one who will not receive rebuke and admonition, his true character will be manifested and will bring shame down upon his own head.

25:34 Proverbs 15, 5. I've listed these four texts just out of Proverbs 15. It's amazing that one of the probably seven or eight most dominant themes in the book of Proverbs is the matter of receiving reproof. I urge you, if you've never gone through marking every text, do that and it'll cause you to cry to God that you have the disposition of the psalmist.

25:55 Let the righteous smite me. Not let anybody smite me. Let the righteous smite me. It shall be as oil upon my head.

26:01 The wise words of old that Dr. Dave W. Tozer said, any man wants to reprove me or rebuke me, I look for the oil on his forehead.

26:09 If the oil is on his forehead, let the righteous smite me. Let the righteous smite me. He doesn't have the oil upon his forehead. You listen to everyone that wants to malign you and slander you, you'll run from the field of battle and you won't be worth a plug next time.

26:23 It's a miracle in the work of God. Conversely, if you do not welcome the reproof of those who have the oil upon their forehead and the oil of love to you, love enough that's ready to reprove you, love that can accurately assess your faults.

26:40 Pharisees were constantly reproving our Lord Jesus, but through the jaundiced eye of a prejudiced heart full of ill will, waiting to catch him in his words. And they caught the Son of God in his words. Even the Son of God could not so guard his words as to be exempt from the work of God. From the accusation of Pharisees.

26:59 This man says he'll build, tear the temple down and build it in three days. Yeah, he did say that. But that ain't what he meant. They quoted his words.

27:08 But they put a meaning upon them utterly antithetical to the meaning of the Lord Jesus. So brethren, this is critical stuff. I commend to you all of these texts I've just listed. I say the four out of that one chapter.

27:19 And as that's your disposition, you will seek to convey that in the counseling session, suiting the remedial counsel to the presently discovered me. All right? I hope those general guidelines will be helpful to you. You'll have occasion to go back to them in days to come.

Directions for Solutions Rooted in Special Revelation

27:35 Now, let's move on. And I think we can cover number two and three before this first hour is up. Directions for solutions rooted in special revelation. Now again, these things overlap and you can't put them in ironclad categories.

27:52 But you remember on our presuppositions we talked about our convictions, concerning the sufficiency and the primacy of special revelation in pastoral counseling, but the legitimacy and the necessity of the insights of general revelation. So this is picking up from our presuppositions, bringing them over into the counseling session when we are actually seeking under God to give direction and to give some biblical medicine for the problem. So directions now for solutions rooted in special revelation. And the first is this.

28:26 Look for biblical statements regarding the behavior or problem which through diagnosis has been uncovered. And I think we ought to add I have in my notes thorough...

28:38 Oh, it is up there. Okay, I just overlooked it. Which through thorough diagnosis has been uncovered. For example, if it is evident that a person is dealing with a bitter, unforgiving spirit, then you ought to take them to such passages as Matthew 6, 14 and 15.

28:55 Don't just talk in generic terms about a spirit of unforgiveness is not a good thing. You take them to the word of God. And here is one of the circumstantial differences where in preaching you might read the text and then expound it phrase by phrase in the counseling situation. You might say to this person now my brother, my sister, John, Mary, it appears to me that what you are struggling with is an unwillingness to forgive your wife.

29:21 An unwillingness to forgive your husband. An unwillingness to forgive. Do you know how serious this is? Well, I'm not sure.

29:28 Well, listen to the words of the Lord Jesus. Have them open their Bible and read out loud to you. If you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

29:43 Now, John or Mary, what is Jesus saying? Well, he's saying that not to have a spirit of forgiveness is not good. No, no, no. That's not what Jesus is saying.

29:50 What is Jesus saying? And you get them to expound a text. And you wait until the right exposition. It comes out of their mouth.

29:57 Will you commit any sins today for which you need forgiveness? Oh, yes. And are you going to go to God, your heavenly Father, expect, oh, yes. On what basis do you think you'll forgive?

30:05 Oh, because Christ died. Yes, that's the ultimate ground. But what's the only spirit in which the virtue of the death of Christ is applied to a sinner? What does Jesus say?

30:16 And you press the issue. And if you just stick on that one passage, you stay there until you have a sense that that bit of the medicine has not merely been run under their nose and passed. Tasted with their tongue. Even if you've had to help them like your kids open their jaw and put it in and they're like your dog when you put a pill down their throat and then you shove it in its mouth and you stroke them.

30:36 Spiritually, you're not going to leave until that bit of divine medicine as best you can discern has been swallowed. Or you take Matthew 18, a frightening passage. And there are counseling sessions sometimes where marriages have gone sour and the bitterness and the rancor. And I've had to take them to this passage starting in verse 12.

30:56 Verse 21 of Matthew 18. How off shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Until seven times? The Lord said no.

31:05 I say not unto you seven times, until seventy times seven. Forgiveness is not a matter that you put in a ledger. It's a prevailing disposition without which you'll go to hell.

31:17 And you end up getting through the passage and you come down to the words of the Lord Jesus. Verse 35. So shall my heavenly Father do to you. What is it do to you?

31:27 Deliver him to the tormentors till he shall pay everything that is due if you do not forgive everyone his brother from your heart. You've got no choice. It's either go to hell or forgive this man that's cut you up with angry words. He has asked your forgiveness.

31:44 Yeah, but he's done it a hundred times. Yes, Jesus said to forgiveness keeps no ledger. And you press out of the word of God. Or you do as I did this morning.

31:55 You turn to Ephesians chapter 4 and you read it. Read verses 29 through 32. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. And be ye kind tender hearted forgiving one another as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you.

32:15 In solutions rooted in special revelation look for biblical statements regarding the behavior or problem which through thorough diagnosis has been uncovered. If it's unforgiveness bring these portions of the word of God to bear. If it's a matter of uncleanness take into such passages as 1 Thessalonians 4 a watershed chapter on sexual purity 1 Corinthians 6 Proverbs chapter 5 Proverbs chapter 7 1 Corinthians 7 This stuff has got to be the working stock of your at-hand apothecary shop in the pastoral counseling situation. And let the word of God loose upon the mind and upon the conscience.

32:55 Then thirdly this grows out of that seek to find and use biblical illustrations of the sinful behavior pattern and examples of resolution and contrasting graces. Seek to find and use biblical illustrations not only explicit biblical texts that address the issue but biblical illustrations. One picture is worth a thousand words. And I'm thinking here for example someone falls into adultery can't believe that God will forgive them.

33:24 You take them to 2 Samuel 12 What joy I've had in the coming counseling situation with men who have fallen into sexual impurity and believe God can never forgive me. And I love to take them to 2 Samuel 12 the whole incident of Nathan coming and you remember the story you know it as well as I and God speaks to his servant and tells him you are the man verse 13 and David said unto Nathan I have sinned against the Lord and Nathan said unto David the Lord has brought me back to you. The Lord has put away thy sin.

34:02 Before he could pen Psalm 51 before he could pen Psalm 32 it's as though and I've had to use this illustration I said it's like God was leaning over heaven for all these months wanting to say the words my son I forgive you but I couldn't do it till his servant said I've sinned and the moment those words came out of David's mouth God said I've put away your sin. That's what I've been longing to say to you.

34:29 That's grace brethren and when someone's broken this is what they need this is what they need this is what they need and what a joy it is to preach the free grace of God to a penitent broken sinner but how much more helpful is this example than simply perhaps even taking 1 John 1 9 if we confess our sins yeah that's good for general stuff but I've committed adultery yes so did David and God invited him and God assures him he's put away his sin and then you may want to take it away take them to Psalm 51 and Psalm 32 and how the blessedness of a forgiven and cleansed conscience breaks forth in praise there are these wonderful historical and biographical sections and why are they given to us 1 Corinthians 10 1 to 11 Paul cites these incidents from the wilderness wanderings and said these things were written for our admonition upon whom the ends of the ages are come James 5 verses 10 and following take the prophets for an example and so much of scripture is historical and biographical and in the light of 2 Timothy 3 17 it is this that is able to make us thoroughly furnished unto every good work of ministry seek to find and use biblical illustrations of the sinful behavior patterns and examples of resolution and contrasting graces while we recognize

35:58 there are some weaknesses in some of the patterns of Puritan sermons sermons left to us and all the rest and I don't think there's anyone here that would give them a place beyond what they deserve but one of the things that makes them so eminent and makes us all seem like pygmies is their facility in this very area I can remember in my earlier ministry before there was this widespread resurgence of appreciation of the Puritans and trying to get people hooked on the Puritans just pulling a volume at random pulling a volume of books to a total relative strength and just say now look put that in your hand open it any place you want I say now count all the references 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 on this page take the next page 1, 2, 3, 13 on this page I say right open the book at another place full of the Bible illustrating the Bible with the Bible applying the Bible with the Scriptures and brethren we need to under God make that our passion not only in the public preaching but also in the private preaching that is in pastoral preaching pastoral counseling seek to find and use biblical illustrations of the sinful behavior pattern examples of resolution and the contrasting graces then thirdly seek for specific biblical directives concerning the problem itself for example someone dealing with the problem of overindulgence with food get some verses that speak directly to the issue whether therefore you eat

37:26 1 Corinthians 10.31 or drink or whatsoever you do do all to the glory of God I have found in dealing with people with eating problems it's never occurred to them that they need to develop a mental habit in which they never put anything into their mouth but what they can say oh God I'm glorifying you by that which I put in my mouth I said if it says whatsoever you do including eating and drinking due to the glory of God then surely that's not a hyper spiritual thing to encourage you to develop the mental activity if I cannot open my mouth and put it in say to the glory of God then don't do it because you're told to eat to the glory of God and that means I eat for the purpose for which God gave me the faculty to eat to nourish my body to enjoy the good gifts of God not to clog up my arteries with life-threatening fat cells not to clog up my waistline so that I don't look like a self-controlled man or woman no that doesn't glorify God and you spell out what does it mean to eat to the glory of God and then impress that upon the conscience take Proverbs 23 20 and 21 and encourage them to memorize the text to get their consciences loaded with specific directives from the word of God that address the particular problem with which they are dealing be not among wine bibbers oh I wouldn't want to be considered one who bends his elbow at the local bar

38:54 among gluttonous eaters of flesh are you just as ashamed to gain the reputation of being a gluttonous eater of flesh as you would be to earn the glory of God and the reputation of being a drunkard for the drunkard and the glutton God puts them together the abuse of his good gift of drink and the abuse of his good gift of food they shall both come to poverty what right do you have to put gluttony in a category of lesser sin than drunkenness when in this text God puts them together you see they wouldn't think of going out and being dead drunk and staggering around with alcohol on their breath and red eyes yet they wouldn't they will without a sense of shame stagger around with the evidence of their gluttony now don't assume everyone who's overweight is a glutton they may not be a glutton but I'm saying the glutton will often according to the scriptures be manifesting the fruits of his gluttony so seek to find these specific biblical directives someone tempted to laziness take them to Proverbs 6 6 and following go to the ant thou sluggard consider a ways Ephesians 6 5 and following specific text of the word of God somebody is obviously getting obsessed with being rich and under the guise of being a good steward work is beginning to swallow up spiritual life and domestic life take them to 1st Timothy 6 9 and following

Directions for Treatment Rooted in General Revelation

40:21 take them to that chapter where Paul warns those who would be rich and the price that they will pay for that inordinate pursuit of riches seek for specific biblical directives for the problem and then thirdly cover category 3 and then in the next hour will take up category for directions for treatment rooted in general revelation and here I have just three very simple words of counsel don't prematurely assume that all problems are exclusively spiritual in nature don't prematurely assume after you get your full read out you may come to the tentative judgment this is primarily a spiritual problem but don't prematurely assume that the psalmist said we are fearfully and wonderfully made and we've looked at some of the text that indicate the delicate interaction between the spiritual and the physical and the body chemical the whole issue uh... that we addressed under general revelation secondly do not attempt to take the role of a competent physician don't attempt to assume the role of the competent position Romans 12 3 I say to every man among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think but to think so as to think soberly

41:38 Now, you may have picked up a little knowledge of things here and there as we've come to principle number three under this heading, but don't attempt to assume the role of a competent physician. Even when you've been driven into an area of study through your own experience and God's dealings with you as I have with the prostate cancer, what I have to resist now is because word has gotten out that I've done some reading and been through this, that I'm ready to be the expert. And this is one of the most imprecise fields in all of medicine. And I just have to tell the people that call me, look, here are the areas where I can give you some broad strokes.

42:11 But, but, I warn you, they're just broad strokes. This is an indefinite field. Go to the specialist. Give them the recommendations.

42:19 Don't assume the role of a competent physician. And then thirdly, learn some practical home remedies for common maladies.

42:28 Cite 1 Timothy 5.22. You know the text. Timothy, fast and pray till God delivers you from all of your manifold weaknesses and infirmities.

42:38 No? Timothy, take a little wine for your stomach's sake and your oft infirmities. That was Paul giving some home remedy. And learn some home remedies.

42:47 You've heard me mention that often when men call me with dullness and spiritual dryness, and I have known them to be true men over the years, I don't assume the problem is primarily spiritual. I go after the whole matter of their cheating on legitimate social diversion, physical exercise. And so often, those hopeless, home remedies are used of God to help them out of their present spiritual, as they assume, spiritual impasse. Well, those are the categories that I hope to cover in this hour.

43:19 And now we'll take a break and then come back at quarter past and take up category number four, directions for treatment of ingrained patterns of sinful or undesirable behavior.

Directions for Treatment of Ingrained Patterns of Sinful or Undesirable Behavior: Responsibility and Resolve

43:32 All right, brethren, let's pick up again at this point. Maybe with those kids screeching, we better shut that one, all right? People will wonder, it'll sound like we've got some mice in a cage we'll pick up on the tape. We come now to number four in your printed notes, directions for treatment of ingrained patterns of sinful or undesirable behavior.

43:55 Now, what's the distinction between sinful or undesirable? I'm not sure if I can make it theologically, but sometimes someone may have undesirable behavior that is not particularly sinful. Someone may have a habit of constantly, rubbing the end of his nose when he talks to you and it's an undesirable ingrained behavior pattern. I'm not sure if you'd want to get into a man's conscience and try to prove to him it was sin, but it certainly is undesirable.

44:20 Don't you think? And then it's about time I stopped. So that's all I'm doing is trying to make a distinction that I think may have some validity. And now moving from the semi-humorous to the very serious, I want to lay out these vital principles.

44:35 And the first is the person must accept responsibility, responsibility for his behavior patterns. And this is absolutely crucial. The person must accept responsibility for his behavior patterns. In the day of judgment, he will be held accountable for them.

44:53 2 Corinthians 5.10 Each of us shall give account of himself before the judgment seat of Christ that each may receive the things done in his body, whether good or whether bad. And in the condition of a rightly instructed, sensitive, conscious, it is always true that a man accepts full responsibility for his sin, even that which is an outcropping of remaining sin against the prevailing bent of his will. You see, when people use the reality of remaining sin, well, my indwelling sin, that's not the way in which Paul expressed his consciousness of the actings of his indwelling and remaining sin.

45:36 Romans 7 and verse 15. He says, For that which I do, I know not. For not what I would, that do I practice. But what I hate, that I do.

45:50 And even though there is this element of what we might call apparent confusion of the soul, this is not the I, the dominant new man in Christ, but nonetheless in the doing of it, the apostle says, I practice. I do. Verse 19. For the good which I would not, for the good that I would, I do not, and the evil which I would not, that I practice.

46:17 But if what I would not, that I do, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. Isn't it interesting that in this last statement is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. This is not to be taken as negating all of these explicit affirmations of owning responsibility for the outcroppings. But it's putting it in that larger context.

46:37 It is not the I, as a new man in Christ, in which grace is dominant, but it is remaining sin acting in me, but never acting in a way that I am exempt from responsibility. The good that I would, I do not. The evil that I would not, that I do. And furthermore, in every single act of repentance and confession,

47:03 absolutely indispensable to every expression of repentance is the owning of personal responsibility. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. And of course, Psalm 51, against you, and you only have I sinned. That sheep is not in the picture.

47:26 Done that which is evil in your sight. And even when He traces the sin back to its source, behold, I was shapen in iniquity and in sin did my mother conceive me. That's not extenuating His guilt, that's owning it at even a deeper level. And so in every true act of confession, there is this owning of responsibility.

47:46 Proverbs 28, 13, He who covers his transgressions shall not prosper, but whoso confesses and forsakes them shall obtain mercy. And brethren, this is crucial in our day in which society is being blamed for human sin and failure. Dysfunctional families are being blamed for people's sins. People's moral aberrations, genetic predispositions, hardly a week passes.

48:14 And I don't get a daily newspaper, but just getting it once a week. But that there's some new discovery of a certain area of ethical and moral aberration that has some genetic answer. Well, it makes no difference to us. It can be empirically demonstrated that someone who becomes a smashing, irresponsible drunk had a chemical predisposition to alcoholism.

48:37 That doesn't disturb us at all. Sin is insincerity. Sin is insincerity. Sin is insincerity.

48:39 Sin is insincerity. It has extenuated itself into the gene pool that some of us have a predisposition of temperament to be more jealous. Others to be more happy. Others to be more serious.

48:50 Others perhaps to be vulnerable to sinful passions of lust, of anger. So what? So what? That doesn't extenuate our responsibility.

48:59 And whatever is demonstrated in empirical scientific studies, you and I should never be moved by this because at the end of the day, the day of judgment, every truth, every true sense of conviction of sin, Romans chapter 7, every true expression of penitence is suffused with the recognition that we are fully responsible for our sins. So in treating ingrained patterns of sinful or undesirable behavior, often the first step to any real resolution is the person accepting responsibility for his behavior patterns. But then secondly, the persons must be resolved to deal with the problem at any cost in the context of hope. They must be resolved, and that should be person, not plural, person, must be resolved to deal with the problem at any cost in a context of hope. Now what do I mean by that terminology? Simply this. Matthew 5, 27 and following indicates that in the matter of dealing with stubborn, ingrained patterns of sin, we must be prepared to deal with that sin at any cost.

50:10 You've heard that it was said you shall not commit adultery. But I say unto you, everyone that looks on a woman to lust after her, he who looks with a view to lusting, desiring, has committed adultery with her already in his heart, and so the Lord anticipates, but you can't help but look. If thy right eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out and cast it from you, for it's profitable for you that one of your members perish and not their whole body be cast into hell. Yes, but I can't help touching if your right hand offends you.

50:40 Causes you to stumble, cut it off and cast it from you. Whatever these words mean, our Lord is teaching, there must be the disposition of determination to deal with the problem at any cost. No excuse. This is a matter of life and death, heaven or hell.

51:00 And our Lord is speaking to His own. And we must be prepared in the counseling situation to say, my brother, my sister, do you realize, this must be dealt with at any cost. No peace treaties. No price too great at any cost.

51:17 1 Corinthians 9.27 After Paul is dealt with the subject of Christian liberty and the abuse and dangers of liberty, he then speaks by way of personal testimony, recognizing that he is vulnerable. He says, verse 26 and 7, So I so run, not as uncertainly, so fight I, as not beating the air, but I buffet my body and bring it into bondage. Lest by any means, after I've preached to others, I myself should be a docky-moss.

51:47 I myself should be reprobate. And notice, all the responsibility Paul takes upon himself. I run. I fight.

51:55 I buffet. I bring it into bondage. Why? Because to do anything else is to run the risk of being apostate.

52:04 Here's the man who says, I'm persuaded that nothing shall separate me from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Where is Paul right? Romans 8, or 1 Corinthians 9. He's right in both.

52:14 And you need to know in your own conscience and then in seeking to get in the conscience of your sheep, at what point they need a dose of Romans 8 as though 1 Corinthians 9 is never in the Bible. And at what point they need a dose of 1 Corinthians 9 as though Romans 8 is not in the Bible. And woe be unto you, personally and ministerially, if you put Romans 8 where 1 Corinthians 9 belongs. Or put 1 Corinthians 9 where Romans 8 belongs.

52:40 There must be this resolution this resolution, to deal with the problem at any cost. Third text I've listed is Hebrews 12, 3 and 4. You've not yet resisted unto blood. Or verse 3, you've forgotten Him, the Lord Jesus, who knew what it was in commitment to persevering obedience to His Father.

53:00 He knew what it was to resist unto blood in striving against sin. We have not. You have not yet resisted unto blood. You have forgotten the exhortation, etc.

53:11 But I've said, in the context of hope. And what do I mean by that? Well, if we have questions that the commitment to deal with this may lead as a road to nothing, to a cul-de-sac, why struggle? But if there is the confidence that as a child of God, Romans 6, 14, sin shall not exercise lordship over me because I am not under the law, but under grace.

53:38 I am not under law. That is, I am not an unregenerate man, but I am not an unregenerate man, bound by the demands of the law, but devoid of the dynamics of grace to be an evangelical law-keeper. I am within the orbit of grace. I've had the law written upon my heart.

53:53 I've been given a disposition and power in virtue of my life union with Christ. I have died with Him. I've been buried with Him. I've been raised to newness of life in union with Him.

54:04 Sin shall not have dominion over you. An affirmation, not an exhortation. I'm not under the reign of law, but under the law. I'm not under the reign of law, but under the law.

54:11 I'm not under the reign of law, but under the law. I'm not under the reign of law, but under the reign of grace. That's the context of hope. The other text I've listed.

54:18 Greater is He, this is the victory that overcomes the world, even our faith. Greater is He that is in you than He that is in the world. And then the final two texts pointing to the intercession of Christ. He's praying that I shall be sanctified.

54:30 Can His prayers be frustrated? He ever lives to make intercession. This secures that I shall be saved to the uttermost. And so, the resolution to deal with the problem at any time at any cost must be in a context of hope.

54:46 And this may often be the point at which you need to minister to that person. They have so often been discouraged and cast down. You'll get sincere men who love Christ, who love their wives, who still struggle with the remnants of their attraction to pornography, to masturbation, to evil thoughts. And often they just feel there's no way out.

55:08 Well, they need to be told yes, there is. Are you determined at any cost to deal with it and in a context that this is not bigger than the grace of God? That this has not exceeded the boundaries or the limitless scope of God's grace and power in the Lord Jesus. But then, thirdly, and brethren, if ever I was tempted to park and just pound away on an issue, it's here.

Directions for Treatment of Ingrained Patterns of Sinful or Undesirable Behavior: Motivation and Reality

55:33 I've lived long enough to have seen so many movements and theologies of the Christian life come down the pike that have as one of their first fundamental errors the attempt to hang the whole Christian life on a single motive. Often it's the motive that transformed the individual who's propounding his theology. This was the key for him and now he's prepared to make it the key for everyone else. So the person must be motivated by as many biblical motives as possible.

56:04 My perspective is if God gave me a hundred motivational factors to help me in dealing with patterns of ingrained sin, it must be because he knows I'm so perverse as to need a hundred. And if I shut myself up to ninety-nine, it may be that hundred that is the final thing that would push me through into an area of liberation and victory. So the person must be motivated by as many biblical motives as possible. And I've just listed, this is not exhaustive, I've just listed a few of the more obvious and dominant ones.

56:33 Love to Christ. John 14, 21. He that hath my commandments and keepeth them, he it is that loves me. He that loves me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.

56:46 Love to Christ. Are you stirring up that motivation, meditating upon what he's done for you, that the reflexive response of your heart will be love to him, whom having not seen your love. Christ's love to us. 2 Corinthians, that should be 5, 14, and 15.

57:03 2 Corinthians 5, 14, and 15. For the love of Christ constrains me, holds me in its vice-like grip. Not my love, not to Christ, but his to me, because we thus judge. So it was Christ constraining love, not in some flight of mystical fancy, but with a mind thinking clearly about the implications of that love.

57:25 The love of Christ constrains me, for we thus judge that if one died for all, therefore all died. And that he died for all, that they who live should no longer henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him who for their sakes died and rose again. A desire to please Christ. 2 Corinthians 5, 9, Wherefore we are ambitious, we make it our aim to be well-pleasing unto him.

57:48 Do you know that what you do can please Christ? It makes Christ glad. The desire to please the servants of Christ. Paul makes this appeal in Philippians 2, 2.

57:59 He says, you want to make me a happy spiritual pappy? Do this. If there's any exhortation in Christ, any consolation of love, any fellowship in the Spirit, any tender mercies and compassions, make my joy full. Make me a happy spiritual father to you.

58:17 Oh, you're doing that to please your pastors? That's idolatrous. Oh, is it? Not according to the Scriptures.

58:24 Is it idolatrous for a child who want to please his earthly father? Is it idolatrous for sheep to want to make their shepherds glad? Not according to the Scriptures. Don't be bullied by that nonsense.

58:37 Stand on the word of God and tell one the sheep, look, I'm grieved. When you have to come in here and tell me, you've fallen again and again. Make my heart glad, John. John, do you love me?

58:50 I love you. John, when you're tempted next time, ask yourself, do I want to make my pastor sad again? That's a biblical motivation. Use it.

59:00 Use it. Desire to please the servants of Christ. Desire to avoid divine chastening. Well, that's very unspiritual.

59:08 Well, that may be, but it's biblical. 1 Corinthians 11, 28-34, Paul gives his disciples the capstone instruction in sorting out the aberrations of the Lord's table. Let a man prove himself and so let him eat of the bread and drink of the cup. And then what does he give as the primary motivation for that exhortation?

59:27 For he that eats and drinks eats and drinks judgment upon himself if he discerned not the body. For this cause many are weak and sickly and not a few sleep. If we discerned ourselves, we should not be judged. The whole passage says this is to be a motivation to deal with the sins and the aberrations that Paul has identified with respect to their Lord's Supper practice.

59:48 And desire to avoid divine chastening is a noble motive. Desire to avoid divine wrath. The Son of God used this with his own disciples. I say unto you, my friends, my friends, I tell you whom you shall fear.

60:03 Don't fear him who can kill the body and after this there's no more that he can do. But fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell. And in Ephesians, that marvelous spirit shall epistle that takes us up into the heavenlies. Paul goes on to say fornication, uncleanness, covetous, let it not be named among you as become saints.

60:23 Nor filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting. Why? For this know of a surety that no fornicator, no unclean person, nor covetous man who's an idolater has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no man deceive you with empty words for because of these things comes the wrath of God upon the sons of disobedience.

60:40 Who's Paul talking to? Saints at Ephesus. And he's saying these sins must not mark you. If they do, you'll go to hell.

60:49 Don't be bullied by saying you should never tell God's sheep that. That's treating them like goats. Indict the apostle Paul.

60:58 I get weary of some of this nonsense.

61:03 Men are not knowing the scriptures. Love to Christ, yes. Christ's love to us, yes. Desire to please Christ, yes.

61:10 Desire to please the servants of Christ. Desire to avoid divine chastisement. Desire to avoid divine wrath. Desire to keep one's health.

61:19 Aren't these the motives set forth in a number of the passages in Proverbs? I've just listed two of them. Proverbs 4, verses 20 to 22. My son, attend to my words.

61:30 Incline your ear to my sayings. Let them not depart from your eyes. Keep them in the midst of your heart. They are life unto those that find them and health to all their flesh.

61:40 Son, you want life and you want health? Then obey my words. Here's a motivation. So when the son is tempted to cast away his father's words, he says, no, no.

61:49 This will result in deleterious effects to my body. This will be the way of death and not the way of life. Proverbs 3, 7, and 8. Don't be wise in your own eyes.

62:01 Fear the Lord. Depart from evil. It will be health to your navel and marrow to your bones. You want to be healthy?

62:08 Here's the path of health. Have a God-centered life. A life in which you are repudiating your own wisdom. You're fearing God and abhorring God.

62:17 You're fearing God. You're fearing God. You're fearing God. You're fearing God.

62:17 You're fearing God. You're fearing God. You're avoiding that which is evil. And then the desire to keep one's reputation.

62:23 Is this a legitimate motive? Absolutely. A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches. Loving favor rather than silver and gold.

62:35 It's a noble thing not to have a reputation that is good but to earn one. To earn one. To be chosen rather than great riches. Loving favor rather than great riches.

62:48 Loving favor rather than great riches. Loving favor rather than great riches. Loving favor rather than silver or gold.

62:52 So these are some of the motivations. And brethren, as I say, this is only a specimen list and you ought to be constantly in searching the scriptures. Say, oh, there's another motivation. There's another one.

63:01 Tuck it away. Pray it in. And then in that counseling session as you're dealing with that sheep, seek to load his conscience with as many biblical motivations as possible. But then the fourth directive for dealing with ingrained patterns of sin, the person must be aware of reality with respect to his sin.

63:21 Now what do I mean by this? Well, Hebrews 3.13 speaks of being hardened through the deceitfulness of sin. Sin is deceitful.

63:31 It doesn't disclose its true colors, its true effect. And it has a hardening effect. Well, you add hardening to deceit and deceit to hardening. And that's a tragic state.

63:42 And therefore, often in pastoral counseling we must labor to bring the person to be aware of reality with respect to his sin. Because, because sin in the true child of God brings a pang of conscience and no one likes pain anywhere of conscience or of body. Whether a thorn in the finger or a thorn in the conscience. We often want relief more than we want release and deliverance from the issue that's bringing the pain.

64:06 And so a person begins to rationalize, well, it's not as though. Well, I'm not actually picking up the pornography. I'm not buying it. I'm not actually going out and having relief.

64:17 You see, I'm not, I'm not, I'm hardening to sin's deceitfulness. And now they come and tell you they have a problem with uncleanness. That person must be made aware of the reality with respect to the sin. What is the sin we're dealing with when we take away all of the fluff that the deceitfulness and the hardening influence of sin have imposed upon that thing?

64:37 That's what I mean by looking at it realistically. Proverbs 7 in verse 14. Proverbs 7 in verse 14. With regard to her activities, notice what she does.

64:48 She extenuates her guilt as a result of a married woman seeking to seduce a naive young man with these words. She says to him, sacrifices of peace offerings are with me this day. I've paid my vows. I'm not a common slut, son.

65:06 I'm a religious woman.

65:08 I've gone to temple today. I've done my religious thing. Isn't it amazing? She's out there in the streets, in the broad places, lying away, caught in, kissed him.

65:18 And the first thing she says to him with an impudent face, she said to him, I'm not a common slut. Sacrifices of peace offerings are with me this day. Have I paid my vows? Therefore, I came forth to meet you.

65:32 Apparently, she makes a connection between her joy in doing her religious service and celebrating by seducing this naive young man. You say, how in the world can that happen? The exceeding deceitfulness of sin. Remember what Jesus said, the time will come when those who kill you will think they render Latria.

65:50 Religious service to God.

65:56 They have a mission of slaying the servants of God. Convinced through the deceitfulness of sin, they're doing God's service. No new thing under the sun, brethren. That's some of what we're facing in these days.

66:09 Men with a mission that they believe is from God to slay his servants, not physically, but their usefulness, their earned reputation, and their passion because they're convinced they're doing God's service. That's how deceitful sinners and that's the potential in my heart and in yours and in the person you're dealing with. And we've got to help them under God to face reality. Proverbs 30 and verse 20.

66:37 Again, only specimen passages. Look at the picture. So is the way of an adulterous woman. She eats, wipes her mouth, said, I've done no wickedness.

66:46 Wait a minute. You've violated the explicit commandment of God. You have violated marriage covenants. But she's persuaded herself.

66:55 Just like someone that eats, wipes their mouth and goes on to their business. I have done no wickedness. Never forget John 3, 19 to 21. This is the condemnation that light has come into the world and men love darkness rather than light because their deeds are evil.

67:11 Neither will they come to the light lest their deeds should be reproved. He that doeth truth comes to the light that his deeds shall be manifested. And remaining sin is no different in its actings than reigning sin in the dominance of reigning sin the unbeliever doesn't want to come to the light. The true believer wants to walk in the light but his remaining sin has the same kind of aversion to light though not the degree.

67:37 And to the extent that someone is practicing evil they don't want to come to light. They want to stay away from light. Extenuate. Excuse.

67:45 Rationalize. And under God we must commit ourselves to be his instruments if he is pleased to bless us to help them to be aware of reality with respect to the sin. The extent of it the nature the nature the nature of it the heinousness of it etc. But then the fifth principle letter E the sinful pattern must be replaced with the opposite grace.

Directions for Treatment of Ingrained Patterns of Sinful or Undesirable Behavior: Replacement and Support

68:06 And often when people are struggling with some ingrained pattern of sin that sin so dominates they don't think of the opposite grace. And this is why I have listed in your text or in your notes the put off put on motif of the scriptures. The put off and the put on motif. Colossians 3 and verse 5 and then again in verse 12 and you're familiar with this throughout particularly the Pauline corpus of the epistles in Colossians chapter 3 and verse 5 put to death therefore your members that are upon the earth fornication uncleanness passion evil desire covetousness verse 12 put on therefore as God's elect holy and beloved the heart of compassion kindness lowliness meekness long suffering etc. the put off the put on Ephesians 4 28 and 29 again a similar motif Ephesians 4 28 I shouldn't say 28 and yes let him that stole steal no more there's the putting off but rather let him labor there's the putting on working that which is good verse 29 let no corrupt speech there's the putting off but the putting on such as is good for building up as the need may be. And then of course I've listed the fruit of the spirit in Galatians 5 22 where there is

69:34 hatred and bitterness the fruit of the spirit is love where there is dejection and sadness born of unbelief there should be joy where there is disruption should be peace etc. This must be the constant goal that the sinful pattern be replaced with the opposite grace. And then letter F suggests a concrete or specific course of action in dealing with the problem. And here I've listed 2 Peter 1 in verse 5 for the principle in 2 Peter 1 in verse 5 Peter writes yea and for this cause adding on your part all diligence in your faith supply virtue and in your virtue knowledge and in your knowledge self-control etc. Here Peter is informing these believers that to acquire these graces will mean that they in the background of God giving us all things that pertain to life and godliness we on our part are to add all diligence these things are not just going to come in a let go let God framework there must be a specific course of action in dealing with the problem I've listed Proverbs 17 27 and 28 we are to be swift to hear we are to be slow to speak Proverbs 17 27 and 28 he that spares his words has knowledge and he that is of a cool spirit is a man of understanding and I've listed

71:03 this text to give an example here's a person that is convinced they have a tendency to dominate conversation and you've identified that and it may not be specifically sinful but they know that it is a violation of some of the general principles of Christian maturity can be sinful in that it could be selfish and it's just an ingrained pattern it was part of their family life part of their upbringing and they've identified they want to deal with it well then you give them some specific things say in any group situation count up the number of people and say I'm going to divide them in half and I'm never going to speak until at least the first half is spoken if there's five people two and a half I won't speak until at least the third person has spoken and so they're in and after a while they actually begin to enjoy listening to other people before they make their contribution you've given them a practical little tool with which to work in mortifying in them the people this tendency to dominate conversation husbands and wives sometimes the same thing you'll come on certain patterns as you're dealing with them and you'll discern it and say look my brother you have a pattern doing this and this you're probably unaware of it as you are as you're breathing may I give you a suggestion how to deal with this and you give them a practical little workable concrete specific course of action to deal with the problem and I've written down there see pages 318 and 319 of the Christian Counselors manual because it gives some very helpful practical suggestions in this area and then

72:32 my final directive is encourage the person to seek the help of others in the body of Christ and here I've listed a number of texts James 5 and verse 16 a text of course which the Roman church has petrified into a totally unbiblical concept of a sacrament but it is the word of God confess therefore your sins not your sins not your faults as the old authorized renders it these are hamartia confess your sins one to another and pray one for another that you may be healed now there must be regulating principles as to what extent in what setting but with all of that conditioning none the less the text is clear this is an explicit commandment of Christ through James that we are to confess our sins one to another there's to be this element of mutual salvation that we are to confess our sins one to another have a mutual supportiveness in dealing with specific sins Galatians 6 1 a man be overtaken in a fault so tell one of the elders and have him make an appointment to deal with it no if a brother be overtaken and one of you be overtaken in a fault you that are spiritual restore such a one in the spirit of gentleness looking to yourself lest you also be tempted 1 Thessalonians 5 14 particularly significant because it comes in the context of the relationship

74:00 relationship of the members of the church to those that are over them in the Lord and they are told to know them and to esteem them highly in love for their work's sake and to esteem them as those who do admonish them. They do admonish them from a position of office and a peculiarly heightened relationship of accountability but after saying be at peace among yourselves, notice verse 14, and we exhort you brethren, all of the brethren you admonish the disorderly you encourage the faint hearted you support the weak you belong suffering toward all and so we need to encourage that when the person comes and says look I'm thankful for whatever help I've been able to give to you, but not only has God given you pastors and teachers for the perfecting of the saints, but he's given the whole body through that which every joint supplies, God has other supplies of grace to pour into you through the other members of the body prayerfully and judiciously taken to the orbit of your confidence spiritually minded people to whom you can render obedience to James 5 16, confess your sins, why should the person struggling with masturbation have to give you a week by week account, you've got too many other things, they say look here's a trusted, do you have a close brother, do you have someone with whom you feel safe, sure yes, alright make yourself accountable to him see if he's willing to have you be accountable

75:28 to him, that you're going to on a weekly basis tell him of your progress and then when we meet a couple months from now you'll know that that accountability that you expressed to me can be validated by brother so and so let me know who, and you set up a network of the body of Christ to minister to this individual so that the whole thing does not rest upon you, Hebrews 3.13 exhort one another daily while it is called today, and then the first Thessalonians 4 passage wherefore comfort one another through these words, Paul assuming that the Thessalonians could be well instructed in the basic theology of the resurrection of the body that would be commensurate for all the saints living and dead at the coming of Christ and that that theology, those words of verses 13 to 17 could be the stuff with which the various members of the body encourage and support one another when their loved ones die and someone comes along and says well they're going to be second class citizens at the coming of Christ first class citizens will be those alive they'd be able to say no, that's not what the spirit of God has said through the apostle, he has said that the dead in Christ shall rise first, the Lord Jesus will give care to his rotting saints before he takes care of his living saints then we that are alive and remain shall be caught up, comfort one another with these words so encourage the person to seek the help of others within the body of

76:56 Christ as they seek to deal with that problem well that's the material I hope to get through this morning and we've gotten through it I give you again as a helpful example of something in the Christian Counselor's Manual this problem solution sheet, what happened, describe the problem, what I did, my response what I should have done, what I must now do just helpful again to put concrete specific directives in dealing with some of these issues and as I've indicated before I hope you will make the Christian Counselor's Manual a book that you do consult when you get into these matters of pastoral counseling has much that is very very helpful in the nuts and bolts application of these principles, at best I'm just giving you an overview of the major issues as I have sought to incorporate them into my own pastoral counseling ministry and as I've tried to cull them from the ministries of others who have been of help to me in this area